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On the last night, I gave a big reading at the National Poetry Club.
在最后一天晚上，我在全国诗歌俱乐部做了一场读书会。
And at the end of the reading,
在读书会结束的时候，
Katharine Kidde of Kidde, Hoyt And Picard Literary Agency,
凯德公司的凯瑟琳·凯德和霍伊特与皮卡德文学社的人
walked straight up to me and shook my hand and offered me representation, like, on the spot.
径直走向我与我握手，当场让我做他们的代表
I stood there and I kind of went deaf.
我像失聪了一样站在那里。
Has this ever happened to you?
这种事发生在各位身上过么？
And I almost started crying
我几乎要哭了出来
because all the people in the room were dressed so beautifully,
因为所有屋子里的人都如此华丽
and all that came out of my mouth was:
然而我却只能说
"I don't know. I have to think about it."
“我不知道，我要再想想”那样的话。
And she said, "OK, then," and walked away.
她说：“当然。”然后离开了。
All those open hands out to me, that small, sad stone in my throat
尽管很多人伸来了橄榄枝，我仍然如鲠在喉
You see, I'm trying to tell you something about people like me.
各位，我尽量告诉大家像我这样的人的感受。
Misfit people -- we don't always know how to hope or say yes or choose the big thing,
不适者经常不知道怎样期待和回答，也不知道在大事面前如何选择。
even when it's right in front of us.
哪怕它们就在我们面前。
It's a shame we carry.
这是我们身上的耻辱。
It's the shame of wanting something good.
这是想接受美好时，就会有的耻辱。
It's the shame of feeling something good.
这是想感受美好时，就会有的耻辱。
It's the shame of not really believing we deserve to be in the room with the people we admire.
这种耻辱让我们不敢相信，我们应该和那些我们敬仰的人站在同一个屋檐下。
If I could, I'd go back and I'd coach myself.
如果可以回到过去，我要像那些
I'd be exactly like those over-50-year-old women who helped me.
50多岁的女人告诉我的那样告诫自己。
I'd teach myself how to want things, how to stand up, how to ask for them.
我要教自己去诉说我的需求，站起来，要回属于我的东西。
I'd say, "You! Yeah, you! You belong in the room, too."
我会跟我自己说：“你！就是你！你应该在这个屋子里。”
