评论
打印
All right, welcome back welcome back, do you enjoy us
欢迎回来 欢迎回来，大家玩的开心吗？
I have taken control of this show tonight
今天晚上的节目将由我来主持
Normally, this program is hosted by that tonight, it is being hosted by this
通常情况下，节目都是由那边那位主持的 但是今天，我来了
Look, this seems like a good opportunity to explain the origin of all the hatreds and bitternesses between me and Jimmy kammel
今天貌似是个很好的机会，给大家讲讲我和吉米之间所有怨恨痛苦的渊源
I think it's time people finally know the truth
是时候让大家了解事情的真相了
Jimmy bumps me from his show every night, because
吉米每天晚上在节目中挤兑我
Jimmy always wanted to be an actor, and unfortunately for him
是因为吉米一直很想成为一名演员，但是很遗憾的是
I....I beat him out for every role that he ever truely wanted it
他真心想要饰演的每个角色最后都被我拿下了
Jimmy has audition for every movie I've ever been in
我参演的每部电影吉米都有去参加试镜
that's true, every single one of them and how many did he get?
是真的，每一部电影 那么他拿到了几个角色呢？
None So he hates me and, Look! I know it seems hard to believe, so
很遗憾，一个都没有 所以他对我心生怨恨 我知道这很难让大家相信
to prove it to you guys, I..I called every casting director in town to get tapes of all of Jimmy's audition
所以为了证明我说的是真的，我给电影的选角导演打电话并且拿到了吉米去参加试镜的录像带
You guys wanna see it? Yeah! Fine
你们想看吗？想看 嗯
Yeah, now I'm sorry Jimmy, I'm gonna have to show I mean, yeah, go ahead, you can roll it
对不住了吉米，我要把录像带拿给大家看看 好了，可以开始放了
This is Jimmy Kammel ready for the role of Will Hunting
吉米试镜《心灵捕手》
Oh, I got a number how do you like them,Apples? Try one more time Again?
诶，我拿到了一个号码牌 你觉得苹果怎么样？再试一次？再读一次？
How do you like them? Apples? Do you like Apples? I have them
你觉得苹果怎么样？你喜欢苹果吗？我有货哦
So you are the guy running for office, aren't you? You bet I am
你就是那个参加竞选的人，是吗？我是
And judging from you speech, you are not wining?
从你演讲的内容来看，你输了？
Well, that what happens when you are a part of the Adjustment Bureau What are you doing?
事情已成定局 这是命运规划局的安排 你在干嘛？
Sorry, what's...what's he doing? I just is planing on that stretching the..
不好意思，他在干嘛？我就是跟摄像机互动一下，伸展下筋骨
No, you can't do it to the camera when you....
不，你对词的时候不应该看着摄像机
So you are the guy running for that? You bet I am You are gonna let me finish
你就是那个......对，我就是 呃，你要先让我说完我的台词
You know this movie is an animated, right? uh?
这是一部动画电影，你知道吧？啥？
It's a voice-over audition What? A voice-over audition
你要做的是配音 配音
But why am I in the costume Hi, kids I'm happy feet two OK, cut
那我为什么要换装 嗨，孩子们，我是快乐大脚2号哦 好，停
My beak kicks off eye Ok, next Picture？ Nope, thanks
噢，我的喙戳到了我的眼睛 好的，下一个 要我的大头照片吗？不，谢谢
Judging from your speech, you are not wining
从你的演讲内容来看，你输了？
That's what happens, when you are a part of the Adjustment Bureau Ok
这是命运规划局的安排，事情就是这样 嗯
Are you say that camera was I supposed to look at?
你是说我对词的时候应该看着那台摄像机吗？
No, just what you do it to it Oh, to you Have you done this before?
不是，是看着我 对着你哦！你之前有过经验吗？
Whenever you are ready. You are adorable. Was that you saying I'm adorable,too?
你准备好就开始了 你好可爱！你会觉得我也很可爱吗？
well, that's why we bought a zoo yeah
这就是我们为什么要买下这座动物园 嗯
Before we start I just clarifying am I..am the stucky? or the stucker? I mean who stuck to who here?
在我们开始之前 我想先弄清楚，我们到底是谁贴着谁呢？
I don't. I'm sorry is that matter for the process? Really?
不好意思，这对我们工作有意义吗？
It's part of my process, it does matter. Who the hell are you?
有意义，对我有意义 请问你是哪位？
I'm Jimmy Kammel, and I'm stuck on you Who looking the Matt Damon
我是吉米 我要黏着你了 谁知道马特·达蒙在哪儿啊？
Go do it The movie is called Stuck on you've even do it ....hey hey, hey, hey
快去找 这部电影叫贴身兄弟 嘿嘿嘿.....
I don't know what this is, is this like a pity reading or something
我不知道这是个什么情况？这是因为同情而组织的会面还是？
No, no, you are here on your own American. Don't.. don't do that
噢不，你是凭实力得到这个角色的
That's.. I've been come..you came here since she is her own.Ameican
我是被选上的......你告诉她她是凭实力得到这个角色的吗？
I've been cost an.. She thinks it's a pity meeting How do you like dump Apples?
她以为是因为同情让她过来的 你觉得苹果怎么样啊？
Next How do like them? Apples?
下一个 你觉得它们怎么样？苹果？
I swear to god if I even feel somebady behind me, there is no measure without.... stop....um
我发誓，如果我感觉到后面有人跟踪我，你无法估量......停
we should just.. yes So we will start it again You ready?
不好意思，我们得重来一遍 你准备好了吗？
Just give us an action again. I swear to god if I even feel somebady behind me
重新开始 我发誓，如果我发现有人跟踪我......
There's no measure....What you doing? What you doing? you read my part
你在干嘛？你在干嘛？你读了我的台词
No, my this, you are the other part. I'm Jason Born. I thought I was really for Born
你的台词是另外一段 我是杰森·伯恩 我以为我是杰森·伯恩呢
Yeah? Why would you? I mean, I played it in the first two movies, why would you read my part?
呃，你以为？我的意思是，这部电影前两部都是我演的，你怎么能不知道，抢了我的台词呢？
I didn't see the first two movies
前两部电影我没看
And thank you, since you spoiler alert. I'm supposed to those alert
你剧透了，剧透了
what goes on here? I mean he didn't say Spoiler Alert I'm, really, I'm sorry yet Spoiler Alert
他这是怎么了？他没说剧透警告 实在是不好意思 剧透警告
