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There’s one way to be rational, there are many ways to be irrational. We could be irrational
有一个招数让你变得理性，但有更多的招数会让你变得不理性。我们因为不理性
by getting confused, not taking actions, being myopic, vindictive, emotional. You name it.
变得困惑，拖延，目光短浅，报复心强，情绪化。凡是你能说的出的。
There’s lots of ways to be wrong. And because of that there’s not one way to fix it.
犯错有许多方式，也因为它不只一种方式改正。但
But one interesting way to try and inject some rationality is to think from an outsider’s perspective.
一种有趣方式是，尝试融入一些理性的东西，以局外人的观点思考。
So here’s what happens. When you think about your own life you’re trapped
所以，这就是事情的进展。当你以你自身的观点思考你
within your own perspective. You’re trapped within your own emotions and feelings and so on.
被困住的生活。你就已经被你自己的情绪和感性以及等等之类的东西给困住了。
But if you give advice to somebody else all of a sudden you’re not trapped
但是，如果你给某些人建议，你又突然不会被
within that emotional ，combination ，mish mash ，complexity， and you can give advice that is
这些内在的情绪，组合，混乱，错综复杂的东西给困住，你还能给出一些建议
more forward looking and not so specific to the emotions. So ，one idea is to basically
对生活更有期望，以及，也不会容易情绪化。所以，一个十分简单的主意就是
ask people for advice. So if your falling in love with some person, good advice is to
向其他人寻求帮助。所以，当你爱上某人，最好的建议是
go to your mother and say, “Mother, what do you think about the long term compatibility of that person.”
问你的妈妈:“妈，你觉得和这个人长期相处如何呢?”
You’re infatuated, right. When you’re infatuated you’re not able
你已经被迷住了。当你被迷住的时候你会不能
to see things three months down the road. You’re saying I’m infatuated.
看到事情的进展。你就说，我被迷住了。
I’ll stay infatuated forever and this will never go away. Your mother being an outsider is not
我永远不会从迷惑中走出来了。你的母亲是一个局外人并不会
infatuated and she could probably look at things like long term compatibility and so on.
被迷住，她看事情有长远的目光，以及，等等。
But there’s other ways to do it which is not to be advisors to other people but
但是，还有除成为他人顾问之外—也成为
to be advisors for ourselves. So for example in one experiment we asked people, we said
我们自己的顾问这样的方法。让我们以一个实验里我们问别人的问题为例，我们问别人,我们会(对他们)说
look, you went to your doctor.
看，你就是你自己的医生。
They gave you this diagnosis. You know that the thing that the doctor recommended is much
他们给你这个诊断。你明白这个医生推荐的事更加
more expensive and there are other things that would be much cheaper. Would you go for
珍贵，这就使其它的事不那么珍贵。你会想要寻求
a second opinion? And people say no, my doctor recommended it. How could I not take their
另外的意见吗?人们都会说:“不，这是医生的建议，我为什么不采纳
advice? How could I say can you please refer me for a second opinion? Then we asked another group.
他们的建议？” 我们很难对他说，“你能参考一下我的意见吗？”然后我们询问另一些人。
We said here is the situation. If this happened to your friend would you recommend
我们解释具体情况。如果这种事发生在你的朋友身上，你会向他
that they go for a second opinion? People said absolutely. How could you not go for
提出另一个建议吗？人们都会说:“当然!”。你应该要
a second opinion? So one idea is to try and get ourselves from an outside perspective.
提出另一个意见。所以，这个很好的方法就是—努力使我们自己得到外界的观点。
You look at the situation and then you say to yourself if this was about somebody else,
你面对这种情况，然后问自己，如果一个十分重要的人
somebody I love and care about and then when this situation what would I advise them?
对一些我爱和关心的人，出现了这种情况，我应该怎样建议他们？
And you would realize that often your advice will be different and often a more rational, useful perspective.
然后你就会意识到，其实你的意见常常起了作用，也常常更有理性，更有个人见解的独特性
