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最凶悍的优步司机来咯

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Let's get to some news here. Big news out of Washington. Today, Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy announced he's retiring,

来看看新闻,来自华盛顿的大新闻,最高法院法官安东尼·肯尼迪宣布退休,
which means President Trump will pick his replacement. When asked which judge he'll choose, Trump said,
这就意味着小特将选择接替者,当被问到将选谁来接任时,小特说
Either Adam Levine or Blake Shelton. They're both a little edgy, for different reasons.
亚当·莱文或是布雷克·谢尔顿,他们都是易激动型,原因各种各样。
After 30 years on the bench, Kennedy is retiring from the Supreme Court.
在任30年,肯尼迪将离开最高院。
He's 81 years old, so he's going to go from sitting around in a robe all day to
他今年81岁了,他将从每天穿着法官袍
sitting around in a robe all day. So it's going to be very difficult,
到每天穿着长袍,这对他来说很难,
but he'll figure it out. So after Kennedy announced his retirement, Donald Trump Jr. sent a tweet, and this is real.
但他一定能处理得很好,随着肯尼迪宣布退休,小特朗普发了推特,这是真事。
It said, OMG! Just when you thought this week couldn't get more lit...
他说老天,当你为本周发生的事情醉了时,你一定不会想到,
I give you Anthony Kennedy's retirement from #SCOTUS.
高院肯尼迪的退休才最劲爆。
Everyone who read that was like, well, the word lit is ruined. So now what are we going to do, think of a new word?
人们读完这条推特后说,醉了这个词毁了,我们现在怎么办?想一个新词吗?
Some more political news. Earlier today, Trump spoke to a group of young people at the White House.
来看看其他政治新闻,今天早间,特朗普对白宫年轻人说了这样一番话。
At one point, he talked to them about NASA. Take a look.
小特谈及了美国宇航局,来看看。
If you don't what you're doing, find something else. If you don't love NASA, if you don't love space,
如果你不好好做事,那就找点别的做,如果你不喜欢宇航局,那就离开这个行业,
do something else. And for the people that do, get over there and be with the space cadets, right?
做点别的,对于那些留下来的人,好好与太空学员工作。
As soon as he said, If you don't love what you're doing, find something else, half the room cleared out.
话音刚落,如果你不喜欢自己做的事情,找点别的做,屋里一半人走了。
They go, Oh, well, I'm out of here if that's the choice.
我们离开了,这是我们的选择。
Get this, it's rumored that Trump might attend the World Cup Final in Russia on July 15th.
有传言称小特将出席7月15日的世界杯决赛。
if he does, he'll spend the whole time hoping that he and Vladimir Putin get shown on the kiss cam. He's like, Oh, no!
如果真的如此,小特和普京将经常出现在“接吻镜头”中,他说老天,难以置信,
I can't believe this! I can't believe what we have to do. I mean, what are we supposed to do? I don't know.
真不敢相信我们做了什么,我们应该这么做?不知道。
I'm so embarrassed. Speaking of Trump, he's in a twitter feud with Harley-Davidson
太尴尬了,说到小特,他在推特上和哈雷戴维森吵了起来,
since they announced that they're moving some jobs overseas.
哈雷戴维森宣布将部分就业转移到海外。
When people heard Trump was feuding with Harley-Davidson, they just assumed it was another porn star.
当人们听说小特和哈雷戴维森吵起来时,还以为这是另一个色情明星。
And you go, No, no. The motorcycle. The motorcycle.
不是不是,这是摩托车,摩托车。
Some entertainment news, The new cast of The Bachelor in Paradise was just announced.
来看看娱乐新闻,新《天国的男子汉》演员阵容公布。
When ABC asked them if they could take off work for six weeks for filming, they were like, Oh, we don't have jobs.
当ABC电台向他们询问,能不能抽出六个月拍摄时,他们说我们没有工作。
What? We'll be there tomorrow. You guys see this? Oprah made a cameo in this week's episode of The Handmaid's Tale.
什么?我们明天就来,听说了吗,在本周的《使女的故事》中,奥普拉制作了一个小浮雕。

prirde.jpg

And this was fun. By the end of the show, all the handmaids had new cars. Really?

有意思的是,在故事结束时,所有的使女都拥有了新车,真的?
Yeah. No spoilers, but it was really interesting. Guys, as you all know, it is Pride Month,
我不是在剧透,但非常有意思,大家知道这个月是骄傲月,
and last weekend was the big Pride Parade here in New York.
上周末纽约举行了盛大的同志骄傲大游行。
And celebrations are still happening to honor the LGBTQ community.
庆祝LGBTQ群体的活动还在继续。
Here to talk about it right now are Tonight Show correspondents Julio Torres and Patti Harrison.
今天来到节目中的是《今夜秀》记者胡里奥·托雷斯和派帝·哈里森。
Welcome, guys. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being here. Hi, Jimmy. Thank you for having us.
欢迎你们,谢谢做客节目,谢谢,你好吉米,谢谢大家。
Yes, and Happy Pride. Oh, Happy Pride. Happy pride to you both.
同志骄傲月快乐,同志骄傲月快乐,你们也一样。
So tell me, did you guys go to the parade this past weekend?
你们上周末去大游行了吗?
Well, yes, Jimmy. But as two powerful queers. we've heard a lot of complaints from straight people asking,
当然吉米,作为两个怪人,我们听到了许多异性恋民众的呼声,
why are there only Gay Pride parades and not Straight Pride parades?
他们说为什么只有同性大游行,而没有异性大游行?
Really? And you know what? They've got a point. So we've taken it upon ourselves to organize the first official Straight Pride parade.
真的吗?他们有自己的观点,所以我们自愿承担组织第一场官方异性大游行的责任。
Wait a second. Straight Pride parade? Yes, but we don't know straight culture that well,
等等,异性大游行?但我们不太清楚异性文化,
and we wanted to bounce some ideas off you first. Yes, because, well, no offense, but you're the straightest guy we know.
所以想让你来听听我们的意见,但不是冒犯啊,你是最异性的异性者。
None taken, yeah. So here are ideas for possible floats in the Straight Pride parade.
一点都不冒犯,来看看异性大游行的一些小意见。
Okay, these are possible floats for the Straight Pride parade. Here we go.
来看看异性大游行的一些小意见,来看看。
Yes. Okay. So, what about a salute to polo shirts one size too big?
比如这个,向大号POLO衫敬礼?
That's interesting. I didn't realize they could make a float out of that, but that's good.
有意思,不知道他们是怎么想的,但很好。
Yeah, we checked and they can. Oh, okay. We were also thinking, a man and a woman on a date
我们查了,他们可以,再比如约会的男女,
where the woman's method of flirting is just that she lightly smacks his arm and says Stop.
而女性的调情方式是,她轻轻地抽打他的胳臂,然后说停。
Very interesting idea for a float. Okay, or how about a dinner party where the women offer to clear the table,
有意思,比如在晚餐派对上,女性提出要清理桌子,
the men stay seated, and no one is disturbed? Okay. Interesting. Interesting, but it sounds a little bit too specific.
男人就一直坐着,没人感到心理不平衡?有意思,但这个很具体了。
But I see where going. Or what about two guys posing in a picture together,
我知道你的意思,比如两个人一块照相,
and they are both pointing to each other in the picture to, I guess, keep track of who all is in the picture.
两人互相向对方指,记录照片中的某某。
Okay, yeah, all right, okay. I could see that, maybe.
明白明白,不错不错。
Or maybe, a couple having sex in the dark. Did you know that straight people turn off the lights when they're having sex?
再比如夫妻俩在黑夜中发生性关系,你知道异性恋者会选择关灯?
And the woman actually keeps her bra on. That's not true. That's not.....all right.
而女性其实是穿着胸罩的,这不是真的,好吧这算一个。
One more. What have you got, Patti? For sure. I got this. Just imagine coming down Fifth Avenue,
再说一个派帝,比如说这个,想想一下走在第五大道上,
a float that is someone karaoke-ing Come On, Eileen, while the next person in line to sing submits their song request to the deejay
某人唱着来吧艾琳,而第二名递给DJ的歌曲依然是
and it is also Come On, Eileen. That's fantastic. That's a good idea. Julio Torres and Patti Harrison, everybody!
来吧艾琳,好主意好主意,掌声送给胡里奥·托雷斯和派帝·哈里森!
I like those ideas. Thank you so much. I like those ideas.
我喜欢这些想法,非常感谢,谢谢你们。
Make those floats out of that, why not? Stop.
说出你的想法,为什么不呢?别说了。
I read that a group of shareholders at Facebook might be plotting to get rid of Mark Zuckerberg.
听说脸书股东们正计划罢免马克。
And their plan would be way more likely to work if Mark wasn't spying on them, using Facebook. So, I mean...
如果马克没有用脸书监视他们的话,他们的计划应该好实现。
And finally, this is very exciting. NASCAR legend Dale Earnhardt Jr. is my guest on the show tonight!
最后来看看,纳斯卡车赛传奇小戴尔·厄恩哈特今晚将做客节目。
He recently retired from racing. Now he's just the most terrifying Uber driver you could get.
他最近刚刚退休,他应该是最恐怖的优步司机了。
You guys, we have a great show tonight. Give it up for The Roots!
今晚的节目很精彩,掌声送给紫金合唱团。

重点单词   查看全部解释    
entertainment [.entə'teinmənt]

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n. 娱乐

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pride [praid]

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n. 自豪,骄傲,引以自豪的东西,自尊心
vt

 
retiring [ri'taiəriŋ]

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adj. 腼腆的,隐居的,不喜社交的 动词retire的

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offense [ə'fens]

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n. 过错,冒犯,触怒,犯规,犯罪,进攻

 
episode ['episəud]

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n. 插曲,一段情节,片段,轶事

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embarrassed [im'bærəst]

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adj. 尴尬的,局促不安的,拮据的

 
feud [fju:d]

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n. 长期不和,争执 n. 封地 v. 长期斗争,结世仇

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figure ['figə]

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n. 图形,数字,形状; 人物,外形,体型
v

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legend ['ledʒənd]

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n. 传说,传奇

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cameo ['kæmiəu]

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n. 刻有浮雕的宝石或贝壳 n. (文艺或戏剧)小品,小

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