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Hey, guys, you ever see a photo in the news and think that headline could be much better? Well, I'll show you what I mean.
朋友们，如果你光看新闻照片，认为标题可以更好些？我向大家说明一下。
It's time for News and Improved. Here we go. News and Improoooooooooved.
又到了《新闻整改》时间，来吧，新闻整改啊。
For example, check out this first photo. The original headline was Trump Optimistic About Middle East.
例如，看看第一张照片，原始标题是小特对中东局势感到乐观。
That headline could definitely be improved because if you only looked at the photo, the headline could've been
标题可以改一下，因为如果你光看照片，标题可以是，
Dad Still Printing Out Directions From MapQuest.
老爸依然从MapQuest地图网站上打印方向。
Uh, hold on a second. Nope, we're almost d...nope. Check out this next photo.
等一下，我们即将，哦哦，看看下一张照片。
The original headline was Rick Perry Approves Nuclear Exports. If you only looked at the photo,
原始标题是里克·佩里批准核出口，如果光看照片，
the headline could've been Local Man Starting to Wonder If Gas-Station Sushi Was a Mistake.
标题可以改成，当地一男子开始好奇“加油站厕所”是否是个错误。
This next headline says, Harris Campaigns in Atlanta. The headline could've been Fun and Clearly Pre-Game Before Coming to Church.
下一个标题是，哈里斯在亚特兰大参加竞选集会，标题可以改成在做礼拜之前进行热身赛。
Wow. Yeah! Going to church! This next headline was Cohen Claims to Have Additional Evidence.
哦哦，没错，去礼拜，下一个标题是科恩宣称有更多证据。
The headline could've been Local Man About to Make This UberPool an Absolute Nightmare.
标题可以改成，当地一男子即将让优步拼车成为噩梦。
Hold on! Sorry, hold on a second. Can you put this... Can you just put this by your feet? Thanks. I got to go first.
等一下，对不起等一下，你能不能把这个放在...你能不能放在脚边？谢谢，我第一个下车。
This next headline was Beto O'Rourke Ramps Up Campaign.
下一个标题是贝托·奥鲁克为竞选助力。
Headline could've been Dad Chooses Most Embarrassing Way Possible to Spot Son in Crowd.
标题可以变成，老爸选择了最尴尬的方式在人群中找儿子。
Jason! Jaso...Hey, Jason! Jas...Is that... No, you're not Jason. Jason! Oh, sorry, you're the most popular kid in school. Where's Jason? My son. Jason!
杰森，杰，杰森，你不是杰森，杰森，对不起，你是学校最出名的孩子，杰森在哪？我的儿子，杰森。
This next headline was Attorney General Promises to Release Mueller Report.
下一个标题是司法部长承诺公布米勒报告。
Headline could've been Man on Magic Mushrooms Tells Everyone to Shut Up and Give Floating Octopus a Chance to Talk.
标题可以变成，在魔幻蘑菇里的男子告诉所有人闭嘴，给漂浮章鱼一个说话的机会。
Here him out! This next headline was Americans Feeling Effects of Trump Tax Plan.
听他说完，下一个标题是美国人感受到了小特税法方案的影响。
Headline could've been Man Desperately Tries to Flag Down the Flight Attendant For a Barf Bag.
标题可以改成，一男子渴望拦下一名空姐要呕吐袋。
The gas-station sushi. Gas-station sushi. And finally, this headline was Only One Blockbuster Store Remains in Business.
加油站的厕所，没错，加油站的厕所，最后一个是只有一家Blockbuster影碟商店还没有倒闭。
Headline could've been Kids Flock to New Museum of Ancient Technology.
标题可以改成，孩子们簇拥着前往新开的古代技术博物馆。
That's all the time we have for News and Improved everybody.
这就是今天的《新闻整改》时间，朋友们。
