评论
打印
Thank you so much. Have a seat. We're going to start tonight, thank you.
非常感谢 请坐 今晚的节目即将开始 谢谢
We're going to start tonight. We're going to talk about Gary Johnson.
今晚的节目现在开始 我们先来聊聊加里·约翰逊吧
You know Gary Johnson, the third party libertarian candidate running for president.
你们知道这个人吗 他是一个第三方党派自由主义党的总统候选人
Now a lot of you right now, you may be thinking, you know, I don't really like Trump
可能你们中很多人现在在想 我既不喜欢特朗普
or Hillary, what has this other guy got to offer?
也不喜欢希拉里 这个人有什么特别之处吗
Well, let's find out.
我们看看就知道了
Who's your favorite foreign leader? Who is my favorite?
你最喜欢的外国领导人是哪位 我最喜欢的外国领导人吗
Any one of the continent, any one of the continent in the country,
对 任何一个大洲 任何一个国家
name one foreign leader you respect and look up to. Anybody.
说出一个你喜欢的尊敬的外国领导人 任何人都行
I was with Shimon Peres. I'm talking about living, go ahead.
我选西蒙·佩雷斯 我指的是在世的 选吧
We have to do this, anywhere, any continent. Name a foreign leader you respect.
一定要说 任何国家 任何一块大陆 选一个你最尊敬的外国领导人
I guess I'm having an Aleppo moment in the former president of Mexico type of.
我对墨西哥前任总理那样的都有点阿勒颇了
I'm giving you the whole world, anybody in the world you like.
我说的范围是全世界 任何一个你喜欢的都行
Forget running for president.
别竞选了
I am not sure Gary Johnson should be allowed to vote like Gary Johnson if you didn't
我不是很确定加里·约翰逊有没有投票权 你们可能不知道
know is in favor of legalizing marijuana and I think it's clear that
加里支持大麻合法化 我觉得很明显他本人对这个问题
he has done a lot of personal research on this issue.
做过很多研究
Like he couldn't name one foreign leader.
如果他说不出某个外国领导人的名字
He should have just made one up. Nobody would know.
编一个不就行了 反正没人会注意到
If I told you the prime minister of Trinidad and Tobago was Carl bin Ardi.
我要是跟你说特立尼达和多巴哥的总理叫卡尔·本·阿迪
You are not going to go, yeah, isn't their Preem Keith Rolely?
你肯定不会回答 他们的总理不是叫基斯·罗利吗
Now you are going to go, this is the strangest interaction I've ever had in a men's bathroom.
那你再接 这是我见过发生在男洗手间的最奇怪的对话
But Gary's excuse is he was having an Aleppo moment if you don't know a few weeks ago
加里理由是 他都阿勒颇了 如果你们不知道什么意思的话 在几周前的另一场采访里
in another interview, he was famously stumped when he didn't know Aleppo was a capitol in Syria.
他狠狠的丢了回脸 因为他连阿勒颇是叙利亚的主要城市都不知道
And you know you have to have a lot of gaffes when you are Gary Johnson and you go, oh,
所以 如果你是加里·约翰逊 你要是说 天 我刚来了个加里·约翰逊
man, I just pulled a Gary Johnson.
那你真的是出丑了
That is classic me.
这就是优秀的我
Now I think it's safe to say we're talking to a few more viewers here tonight
我们今晚的观众比平时多了一些
because today is national coffee day. So—
因为今天是国家咖啡日 所以——
A guy down here went yeah!
这个人刚激动地大喊了一声 耶
Imagine a lot of people at home are like I don't know what it is, I just can't get to sleep. Oh look.
想想看 很多呆在家里的人会觉得 不知道那是个什么节日 反正我睡不了了 看
Yeah, national coffee day today, coffee shops all over the country celebrated by giving out free coffee.
对今天是国家咖啡日 全国的咖啡店都开始庆祝节日 他们给大家提供了免费咖啡
Now I want everyone, take a look under your seats, right now.
现在我想让大家每一个人 看看自己的椅子下面 现在就看
Have a look under there.
看看椅子底下
If anyone finds a blue pen, I dropped it at rehearsal.
有谁看见一只蓝色的钢笔了吗 我刚彩排的时候弄掉了
What did you think we were going to have hot coffee under there?
你们想什么呢 还以为我会给你们准备热咖啡吗
Here's the thing, coffee isn't just a delicious beverage, it's also a way to express yourself.
咖啡不仅美味 还是一种可以用来表达自我的东西
In fact there are some Baristas who make a living actually drawing art on the coffee, art like this.
有一些咖啡师就可以通过在咖啡上画画谋生比如这种
Which is amazing. It's not just unicorns, they can do portraits, landscapes, sports logos.
非常神奇 不仅仅是独角兽 他们还会画人物肖像 风景 还有运动项目的标志
In fact, the only things these Baristas can never draw is the words
实际上 咖啡师们唯一画不出来的东西 就是
I'm proud of you from their father's mouth.
从他们父亲嘴里说出来的那句 我为你感到骄傲
