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Is there someone in your life who makes you feel emotionally exhausted just by being around them?
在你的生活中，是否有这样一个人，他的存在让你感到身心疲惫？
Or leaves you feeling upset, anxious, or stressed out, whenever you spend time with them?
或者是和他们在一起会让你感到不安、焦虑或压力山大？
If there is, then you should watch out, that person might be an Energy Vampire.
如果是这样，那么你应该注意了，这个人可能是精力吸血鬼。
Energy Vampires aren't at all like those people you dislike or disagree with.
精力吸血鬼并不都是那些你不喜欢或三观不一的人。
It is not a matter of you simply finding it hard to get along with them.
这不仅仅是你觉得很难与他们相处的问题。
In fact, most Energy Vampires tend to be close friends or family members,
实际上，大部分精力吸血鬼都可能是亲密的朋友或家人，
always exploiting you and zapping away your energy, without you knowing it.
总是在不知不觉中利用你，消耗你的能量。
They're stubborn, manipulative, intitled, and self-absorbed.
他们固执、控制欲强且以自我为中心。
They are people who want to have you at their beck and call.
他们是想让你听他们使唤的人。
They call or use you as a psychological punching bag to feel good about themselves.
他们会利用你，把你当作让他们自我感觉良好的心理沙袋。
Does this sound unsettlingly familiar to you?
这听起来是不是很熟悉呢？
If you want to find out whether you are in a situation like this, here are six signs you are dealing with an Energy Vampire.
如果你想知道自己是否身处这样的情况之中，以下是你在和精力吸血鬼打交道的6种迹象。
1. They like to play victim.
1. 他们喜欢扮演受害者。
Energy Vampires usually don't take responsibility for their mistakes.
精力吸血鬼通常不会为自己的错误负责。
They can't hold themselves accountable for the part they play when things go bad
当事情变糟时，他们无法对自己所扮演的角色负责，
but instead, blame everyone else for what happens to them. They are manipulative.
但相反，他们会为自己的遭遇而责怪他人。他们控制欲很强。
For example, they may constantly guilt trip you into feeling sorry for them, doing favors for them and staying by their side.
例如，他们可能会不断地让你感到内疚，让你觉得对不起他们，帮他们的忙并支持他们。
Based on a study by Lobel and Taiber, people who behave like this often struggle with extremely low-self esteem
根据Lobel和Taiber的一项研究，有这样行为的人自尊心很低
and seek constant validation from others as a coping mechanism.
并不断寻求他人的认可，以此作为一种应对机制。
Thus, they come off as needy, clingy, and sometimes even co-dependent on those around them
因此，他们给别人的印象是很黏人，有时甚至会依赖周围的人。
2. They are narcissistic.
2. 他们很自恋。
Energy Vampires are known to be highly self-absorbed. Have you ever found yourself dealing with someone
众所周知，精力吸血鬼非常自私。你有没有遇到过这样的人，
who constantly only ever wanted to talk about themselves and never listened to anything you had to say?
他总是只想谈论自己，从来不听你说什么。
Well, people like this are often charismatic and smooth-talking, which makes it harder to stay away from them.
这样的人通常都很有魅力，能言善辩，这也让你很难远离他们。
Often times they have little to no capacity for empathy, and will usually only pretend to care about you when it benefits them.
通常情况下，他们几乎没有同情心，只有在对他们有利的时候才会假装关心你。
They might expect you to always put them first and be upset with you when you don't give in to their demands for attention or praise.
他们可能希望你总是把他们放在第一位，当你不满足于他们对注意力或表扬的要求时，他们会对你感到不安。
Do you know someone like this in your life? Perhaps, you might relate to being a narcissist but feel no shame.
你周围有这样的人吗？也许，你可能觉得自己是一个自恋者，但并不为此感到羞耻。
Self-awareness is Key! If you enjoy our content so far, don't forget to subscribe for more psychology and mental health content!
自我意识是关键！如果你还喜欢我们的内容，不要忘记订阅我们的频道获取更多关于心理学和精神健康的知识！
3. They want to dominate you.
3. 他们想要控制你。
Do you know someone who is loud-mouthed and loves to feel superior over others?
你是否认识某个爱说大话、喜欢高人一等的人？
Chances are, individuals like this are actually deeply insecure about themselves.
其实这样的人非常缺乏安全感。
They are afraid of appearing weak or foolish and so they overcompensate by intimidating others
他们害怕表现出脆弱或愚蠢的一面，所以他们通过恐吓他人
and exerting their dominance over those around them. They put you down, in order to feel good about themselves.
和对周围的人施加控制来过度补偿。他们贬低你，是为了让自己感觉良好。
They also feel insecure about your success and achievements because they fear being out-done.
他们对你的成功和成就感谢不安，因为他们害怕被超越。
A study by Nagi and Davis, suggests that highly competitive and likely Type A personalities have a neurotic need to beat others.
Nagi和Davis的一项研究表明高度竞争和A型人格有打败别人的神经质需求。
4. They create unnecessary drama.
4. 他们制造了不必要的戏剧。
Chaos can be exhilarating for an Energy Vampire as long as they are at the centre of attention.
对精力吸血鬼来说，只要自己是注意力的中心，混乱就是令人兴奋。
They tend to have an exaggerated sense of self-importance and they enjoy playing the sympathy card on others
他们往往有一种夸大的自负感，并且他们喜欢打同情牌。
This is why they thrive in crisis, and love to create problems, either for themselves or others, making mountains out of molehills.
这就是为什么他们在危机中茁壮成长，喜欢给自己或他人制造麻烦，小题大做。
They gossip and make trouble wherever they go in order to distract themselves from the emptiness they feel.
他们到处说长道短，到处惹是生非，为的是把自己从空虚的感觉中解脱出来。
They go to great lengths just to feel intense emotions, even when they are negative.
他们竭尽全力只是为了感受强烈的情绪，即使那些情绪是消极的。
5. They constantly criticize you.
5. 他们总是批评你。
If someone constantly criticizes you and makes you feel bad about yourself, they might be toxic to your mental health.
如果有人总是批评你，让你觉得自己很糟糕，那么他们可能对你的精神健康有害。
They prey on your insecurities and emotionally manipulate you. While it seems obvious enough,
他们利用你的不安全感，操纵你的情绪。虽然这看起来很明显，
sometimes it can be difficult to recognize this behaviour in others, especially if they are someone close to you.
但有时很难辨认他人的这些行为，尤其是如果这些人是你亲近的人。
People like this often seem friendly on the outside but deep down
这样的人通常表面看似友好，但在内心深处，
they might already be harbouring malicious intentions towards you.
他们可能已经对你怀有恶意。
6. They exploit your kindness.
6. 他们利用你的善良。
Based on a study by Grosz and others in 2015, compassionate and caring people are prime targets for their abuse.
基于Grosz和他人2015年的研究，富有同情心和爱心的人是他们遭受虐待的首要目标。
If ever you have come into contact with an Energy Vampire
如果你碰巧和精力吸血鬼打过交道，
and shown them any sympathy or understanding, they are likely to use your good nature against you.
并且对他们展现过任何同情或理解，那么他们可能会利用你的善良对付你。
For example, they take advantage of you by coercing you into doing things you don't wanna do.
例如，他们利用你，强迫你做你不想做的事。
These people will demand a lot more than you can give.
这些人所要求的会远远超过你所能给予的。
Establishing healthy boundaries with others is incredibly important.
与他人建立健康的界限是非常重要的。
If someone is weighing you down and taking a toll on your emotional well-being, this person isn't worth keeping in your life.
如果有人让你感到沮丧，对你的情绪健康造成损害，这个人不值得成为你的朋友。
Too much company with an emotional vampire can be detrimental to your mental health, so recognize the signs and know your limitations.
和一个情绪化的吸血鬼过多的交往对你的精神健康是有害的，所以要认识到这些迹象并知道自己的局限性。
Do you know anyone who fits the descriptions of an Energy Vampire? And how did you deal with them?
你有认识的人符合以上对精力吸血鬼的描述么？你是如何和他们打交道的？
Let us know in the comments section below. Share this with someone you think would benefit from this as well.
请在下方评论告知。请和需要的人分享本期视频。
Don't forget to click the like button and subscribe for more psychology content. And as always thanks for watching!
不要忘记点赞并订阅已获得更多心理学内容。一如既往，感谢收看。
