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Now the question is, "how do we overcome this perfectionism, this constant knot in our stomach?
而问题在于 “我们如何克服完美主义这个解不开的结呢”
How do we overcome this living in the future,
我们如何克服活在未来中的感觉
being afraid of the present because what if I fail?
因为害怕失败而害怕当下的感觉
And I started to describe a few methods: the first one is
我讲了一些方法 首先是
being aware of it-being aware of what I want to change and what I want to maintain.
认识它 认识到我想改变什么 我想保持什么
Remember Ellen Langer's study-about getting a more nuance understanding
还记得埃伦·兰格的研究吗 关于更确切地了解
of what it is that I want to change. Because for very long time, I couldn't,
我到底想改变什么 因为长久以来
couldn't become less of a perfectionist because associated with
我都是个完美主义者 因为总是想着
perfectionism, with also success, my subconscious were stopping me
完美 总是想着成功 我的潜意识让我没法
from letting go of perfectionism because I thought that also means
摆脱完美主义 因为我会认为那就意味着
throwing out baby with bath water, i.e. my success.
把宝宝和洗澡水一起冲走了 也就是成功被冲走了
But now that I have a more nuance understanding of perfectionism
但现在我更确切地了解了完美主义
which is an incapacitating fear of failure,
它就是一种对失败的无法抑制的恐惧
and I understand that I can still be as ambitious and not give up my success,
我明白了我仍然可以充满抱负 而无需放弃成功
and yet enjoy the process-that's a better understanding.
同时享受这个过程 这是更好的理解
And now I can move forward. So the first step is awareness.
这样我就能继续前进 因此第一步就是认识
After we have awareness, it's about going back to Dweck's notion of rewarding effort.
在我们获得了认识之后 就是徳韦克关于工作回报的概念
Remember, Carol Dweck was able to change students
记住卡罗尔·徳韦克能够在短短几小时内
and adult's mind set with as little as a few hours.
就改变学生和成人的思维模式
And sometimes, this mind set has been set in them from a very young age.
有时候 这些思维模式在他们非常小的时候就已经奠定了
The fixed versus the malleable mind set. And Carol Dweck by teaching them
思维模式是固定的 还是可塑的 卡罗尔·徳韦克通过教他们
the malleability, the neuroplasticity-how our brain constantly changes
可塑性 神经的可塑性 我们的大脑是时刻在变化的
by teaching them that to focus on the journey, on the effort,
通过教他们关注过程 关注所付出的努力
as opposed to the outcomes, as opposed to the intelligence,
而不是结果 或者最后的成就
was able to change their mind set.
从而改变他们的思维模式
