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Do you ever wonder about how you turned out the way you are or why some adults are more uptight than others
你有没有想过你是怎么变成现在这样的，或者为什么有些成年人比其他人更紧张不安，
wle others are fun and delightful as cliche as it sounds it all comes back to your childhood.
而另一些人则有趣又令人愉快，这一切都要回溯到你的童年。
Depending on the households we grew up in some of us may cringe at the thought
根据我们成长的家庭的不同，我们中的一些人可能会对这种想法感到畏缩，
while others may look starry-eyed as they grow nostalgic.
而另一些人可能会因为怀旧而显得天真乐观。
Before we begin with this video, we want to remind you that it's never too late to change your future.
在我们开始这段视频之前，我们想提醒你，改变你的未来永远不会太晚。
Even if certain past events put you in a stronger likelihood of outcomes.
即使过去的某些事件让你更可能出现某些结果。
Here are eight ways your childhood affects your lifestyle.
以下是八种童年影响你生活方式的方法。
One if your parents were highly strict you may grow up to be codependent.
如果你的父母对你很严格，你长大后可能会与人相互依赖。
Did you have an overbearing mother who picked out every outfit for you
你有没有一个专横的母亲为你挑选每一件衣服，
or an inflexible father who made you practice more sports instead of hanging out with your friends?
或是一个固守己见的父亲，他让你做更多的运动，而不是和朋友们一起玩？
Even if they mean well or believe that they're doing what's best for you.
即使他们是善意的或者相信他们在做对你最好的事。
Helicopter parenting has harmful side effects a big one being that you're more likely to grow up codependent.
直升机养育法具有有害的副作用，一个很大的副作用是你更有可能在成长过程中与他人相互依赖。
As an adult you might rely on your partner to take care of the chores or have trouble adapting to work life.
作为一个成年人，你可能会依赖伴侣来处理家务，或者很难适应工作生活。
Two, if your parents have a broken marriage it changes your romantic demands.
第二，如果你的父母婚姻破裂，这会改变你对浪漫爱情的需求。
It's like Pam said from the office when you're a kid, you assume your parents are soul mates.
就像帕姆在办公室说的，当你还是孩子时，你认为你的父母是灵魂伴侣。
But unfortunately this isn't always the case.
但不幸的是，情况并非总是如此。
Divorce rates are skyrocketing in America.
美国的离婚率正在飞涨。
Now up to 40 to 50 percent of married couples more likely to end up in a divorce.
现在高达40%到50%的已婚夫妇离婚的可能性更大。
If your parents separated, especially if the event happened during your early childhood,
如果你的父母分居了，尤其是在你幼年时期，
studies show that you're prone to having higher demands when it comes to romantic relationships.
研究表明，涉及到恋爱关系时，你很容易有更高的要求。
You may expect your partner to show a higher degree of morality, loyalty and compassion, so you can trust them better.
你可能希望伴侣表现出更高的道德、忠诚和同情心，这样你就能更好地信任他们。
Three, if your parents micromanage you, you're more likely to develop depression.
第三，如果你的父母对你进行微观管理，你更容易患上抑郁症。
Ok, we talked about codependency.
好吧，我们讨论了相互依赖。
But depression is also a damaging side effect of authoritarian parenting.
但是，抑郁也是专制型管教的一个有害的副作用。
When you grow up with parents who do all the decision-making for you,
当你和为你做所有决定的父母一起长大，
it makes you assume that you're not competent enough to problem-solve on your own.
这会让你认为你没有足够的能力独自解决问题。
Instead of listening to you and nurturing you to learn from your mistakes,
他们通常会强迫你做出决定，即使是那些决定让你不开心，
they often force decisions onto you even ones that make you unhappy.
也不倾听你的意见，培养你从错误中吸取教训。
This can lead to feelings of worthlessness and low self esteem which follow you into adulthood, manifesting into depression.
这会导致无价值感和自卑感，伴随你进入成年期，表现为抑郁。
Four, if your parents watch TV with you when you were a toddler instead of reading to you, it can suppress your communication skills.
第四，如果你的父母在你蹒跚学步时和你一起看电视，而不是给你读书，这会抑制你的沟通能力。
We always see those commercials of mothers reading to their babies, but this advertisement actually has value.
我们经常看到母亲给孩子读书的广告，但这个广告确实有价值。
It turns out that if your parents expose you to more television as a toddler instead of flipping through books,
事实证明，如果你的父母让你在蹒跚学步时看更多的电视而不是翻阅书籍，
this can hinder your communication skills.
这会阻碍你的沟通能力。
Studies have shown that when a mother and child watch TV together, the mother makes viewer comments to the child.
研究表明，当母亲和孩子一起看电视时，母亲会对孩子发表评论。
Whereas if she reads to her child, it promotes the child to ask questions and a higher response rate from the mother.
而如果她读给孩子听，会促进孩子提出问题，并提高母亲的回答率。
Five, if you copied your parents a lot, you're more likely to be open to other cultures.
第五，如果你经常仿效父母，就更有可能对其他文化敞开心扉。
Did you often imitate your parents growing up?
你在成长过程中，经常模仿父母吗？
Even if the actions didn't always make sense, you knew that they had some sort of purpose.
即使这些行动并不总是有意义的，你也知道它们具有某种目的。
Researchers had an adult show a child how to open a box with sticks.
研究人员让一个成年人教孩子用棍子打开盒子。
Even though it's more practical to use their fingers, when children imitate the behaviors of their parents, they're more likely to adapt to cultural norms.
尽管用手指更实际，但当孩子模仿父母的行为时，他们更容易适应文化规范。
That's because cultural beliefs and customs may not always be seeing as practical and can even be outdated,
这是因为文化信仰和习俗可能并不总是被视为实用的，甚至可能过时，
but when the individual is open to learning them, they also have the ability to be more culturally aware.
但当个人愿意学习它们时，他们也有能力对文化更加了解。
Six, if you were spanked as a child, you may become sneakier as an adult.
第六，如果你小时候被打屁股，成年后你可能会变得更狡猾。
In some countries, it is now illegal to spank your child because it's seen as physical abuse.
在一些国家，打孩子屁股是违法的，因为这被视为身体虐待。
Depending on the severity of spanking, it has harmful side effects ranging from academic problems to health ones,
根据体罚的严重程度，它会产生从学业问题到健康问题的有害副作用，
such as dying at a younger age of cancer heart diseases and respiratory diseases.
比如在年轻时死于癌症、心脏病和呼吸道疾病。
But did you know that you're also more prone to being a sneaky adult?
但你知道你更容易成为一个狡猾的成年人吗？
Author Daniel Pink states that trying to influence a child's behavior
作家丹尼尔·平克说，试图通过奖励和惩罚来影响孩子的行为，
by offering rewards and punishment does not always result in the desired behavior.
并不总是会产生想要的行为。
In fact children who were spanked may work harder to avoid being punished.
事实上，被打屁股的孩子可能会更努力以避免受到惩罚。
Seven, if your parents have a drug or alcohol addiction, you're susceptible to perfectionism.
第七，如果你的父母有毒瘾或酒精成瘾，你很容易成为完美主义。
Do you know someone who is serious has a good work ethic and is a bit of a perfectionist?
你知道一个严肃的人有良好的职业道德，还会有点完美主义吗？
Chances are they might have grown up being a parent to their own parents?
他们长大后有可能成为自己父母那样的父母？
When a child has parents who are alcoholics or drug addicts, they never had the opportunities to let loose in how fun.
一个孩子的父母是酗酒者或吸毒者时，他们从来没有机会放纵自己的乐趣。
Instead they had to grow up faster than the other children and take care of household responsibilities.
相反，他们必须比其他孩子成长得更快，还要承担家庭责任。
On the other hand some children may adopt the habits of their parents
另一方面，有些孩子可能会养成父母的习惯，
which can manifest into depression anxiety and feelings of worthlessness.
表现出抑郁、焦虑和无价值感。
Eight, if you have a close relationship with your father, you're more likely to enter healthier relationships.
第八，如果你和你父亲关系密切，就更有可能进入更健康的关系。
We've all probably heard of the term daddy issues when someone grew up without a father around.
我们都可能听说过“父亲问题”一词，就是在没有父亲的情况下长大。
Unfortunately, research only continues to show it's true.
不幸的是，研究继续证明这是真的。
One study examined the quality of father-child relationships among three groups, orphans, children of divorced parents and children in stable families.
一项研究考察了三组父亲和子女的关系质量，分别是孤儿、离异父母的子女和稳定家庭的子女。
Results showed that the children, whether they were male or female with a close relationship with their father,
结果显示，与父亲关系密切的孩子，无论男孩还是女孩，
were more common than those who didn't.
都比那些没有这种关系的孩子更正常。
When we are able to love our parents and learn to be patient with them,
当我们能够爱自己的父母，并学会对他们有耐心时，
we are more likely to do the same for our romantic partners.
就更可能对我们的浪漫伴侣做同样的事情。
Which of these points do you relate to?
你和以上几点哪些相关联？
Did you know that your childhood can also affect your lifestyle, check out our video here.
你知道自己的童年也会影响你的生活方式吗，看看我们的视频吧。
Thanks for watching.
感谢收看本期节目。
