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Have you ever met someone so seemingly happy and upbeat that it completely blindsided you to find out that they were dealing with some very dark and serious feelings or that they had suffered a terrible tragedy in the past that left them emotionally traumatized?
你曾经有没有遇到过表面看似快乐乐观的人但背后却在应对一些非常黑暗严肃的感情，或者他们过去经历过什么可怕的悲剧以致情感受到了创伤？
While we'd all like to think we'd know if something was wrong with someone we're close to, or that we'd easily be able to tell if a loved one of ours was feeling down or unhappy,
我们都想知道自己身边亲近的人是不是遇到了什么问题，也想知道我们所爱的人是不是情绪低落活着不开心，
the truth is, you never really know everything that's going on in another person's life. You only know as much as they're willing to show you.
然而事实是，你永远不会真正了解另一个人生活中发生的一切，你知道的只是他们愿意告诉你的。
And if the startling rates of suicide and untreated depression are anything to go by, we all need to do a better job of looking out for our loved ones.
如果自杀率和未治疗沮丧的惊人比例可以作为依据的话，我们都需要更好地照顾自己所爱之人。
So, how can you tell if someone is secretly unhappy? Well, here are seven warning signs you need to look out for.
那么，如何判断一个人其实是不开心的呢？下面是你需要注意的7个警告信号。
Number one, they deflect serious conversations and questions.
第一，他们会转移严肃的谈话和问题。
Whether it's through humor, sarcasm, or just by being downright dismissive, when someone is secretly unhappy, you'll start to notice how often they deflect serious questions and conversations.
无论是通过幽默、讽刺，还是完全的轻蔑，当某人私下里不开心时，你会注意到他们经常转移严肃的问题和谈话。
They never really talk about anything important going on in their lives anymore, and they've stopped confiding in you as much.
他们不再真正谈论自己生活中发生的任何重要的事情，也不再向你吐露心声。
Even when you know they're going through something like failing a class or dealing with their parents' divorce, you just can't get them to open up about it.
即使你知道他们正在经历一些事情，比如功课不及格或父母离婚，你也无法让他们向你敞开心扉谈论这些事情。
At best, they'll shrug, laugh it off, or make some wordy remark that makes it seem like it's no big deal to them.
最好的情况是，他们会耸耸肩，一笑置之，或者说一些冗长的话，让自己觉得没什么大不了的。
Number two, they give short responses.
第二，他们的回答很简短。
Another common way people tend to deflect topics they don't feel comfortable talking about is by giving short, clipped responses.
转移自己不喜欢谈论的话题的另一种常见方式是给出简短的回答。
So if you've noticed your friend or family member talking a lot less and being more curt than usual, then that should be your first clue that something is definitely wrong.
所以，如果你注意到自己的朋友或家人说话比平时少，而且更粗鲁，那么这应该是你的第一个线索，说明肯定出问题了。
Have they stopped talking to you or texting you as much?
他们有没有突然话变少了，信息也发得少了？
Do they stay uncharacteristically quiet in conversations now, or don't give you their opinions when asked?
他们有没有在谈话的时候异常地安静？或者在被问问题时不说自己的观点。
Apathy and disinterest are some of the early signs of depression.
冷漠和不感兴趣是沮丧的早期迹象。
Number three, they unexpectedly cancel plans at the last minute.
第三，在最后一刻突然取消计划。
Has your loved one been canceling on you a lot lately?
你爱的人最近有经常放你鸽子吗？
Have they been showing up uncharacteristically late or started skipping school or missing work? Try to talk to them about it and ask them why.
他们有没有一反常态地迟到或者开始逃学、旷工？试着和他们谈谈，问问为怎么回事。
Even if their reason seems plausible and they reassure you that everything is fine, keep a close eye on them, anyway.
即便他们的理由看似合理并向你保证一切都好，但无论如何要密切关注他们。
If they start to bail on things that are important to them like that recital they've been rehearsing for for months,
如果他们开始放弃对他们来说很重要的事情，比如已经排练了好几个月的演出，
or that competition they worked so hard to get in, then that's a red flag that you shouldn't ignore.
或者他们努力争取的比赛，那么这就是一个你不应该忽视的危险信号。
Number four, they sleep a lot.
第四，嗜睡。
Did you know that oversleeping is one of the most noticeable symptoms of depression?
你知道吗？睡过头是沮丧最明显的症状之一。
Just like with insomnia, which is the inability to sleep, any significant disturbance in your sleeping pattern is a marker for depression.
就像失眠(无法入睡)一样，任何明显的睡眠障碍都是沮丧的标志。
Hypersomnia is when you oversleep and are sleeping too much.
嗜睡症是指睡过了头，睡得太多。
People often turn to sleep when they feel lost and empty where they can wink out and no longer have to worry about the world around them.
当人们感到失落和空虚时，他们常常会睡着，这样他们就可以闭上眼睛，不再担心周围的世界。
They may be unmotivated to get out of bed and spend most of the day sleeping and laying in bed.
他们可能没有动力下床，会把大部分时间都花在睡觉和躺在床上。
Even when they do get up, they'll still feel exhausted and have little to no energy.
即便他们真的起床了，但仍会觉得筋疲力尽，没什么精神。
Number five, they prefer to be alone more than usual.
第五，他们比平时更喜欢独处。
When someone tries to push you away, it's often subtle and happens gradually over time.
当有人想推开你的时候感觉通常是很微妙的，而且是随着时间的推移逐渐发生的。
They may go from canceling plans to not bothering to make any plans with you altogether.
他们可能会从取消计划到懒得和你一起做任何计划。
And though they may tell you something else, the real reason why is because they find themselves wanting to be alone more and more often.
虽然他们可能会给你一些其他的理由，但真正的原因是他们发现自己越来越想要独处。
So if they stop posting online, responding to messages, or returning your calls, it's because they're emotionally withdrawing and isolating themselves from others as a way of coping with the unhappiness that they're struggling to repress.
所以，如果他们停止发朋友圈，回复信息，或者回你的电话，那是因为他们在情感上退缩，把自己孤立于他人，作为一种应对自己努力压制不快乐的方式。
Number six, they've become timid and don't want to announce their presence.
第六，他们变得胆小，不想宣布自己的存在。
Once confident, animated and easygoing, you've noticed a change in the person in front of you.
曾经自信、活泼、随和，你注意到自己面前的这个人变了。
Their smile doesn't seem as genuine anymore, or their laughter as easy.
他们的笑容不再那么真诚，也不会那么轻易展现。
They've stopped dressing up and maybe even stopped bothering with their appearance altogether.
他们不再精心打扮，甚至可能完全不再在意自己的外表。
They dress in clothes that they can hide in like hoodies and sweatpants, and they don't like to draw any attention to themselves.
他们穿着可以隐藏自己的衣服，比如帽衫和运动裤，他们不喜欢引起任何人的注意。
They walk quietly in small strides, and usually duck their head down while they do.
它们迈着小步安静地走着，通常都低着头。
They make themselves small by taking up as little space as possible, and keep their hand gestures to a minimum.
他们通过占用尽可能少的空间来使自己变小，并尽量减少自己的手势。
And number seven, they're easily upset.
第七，他们很容易不开心。
Finally, but perhaps most importantly, if someone gets easily upset in a way that's uncharacteristic of them, then it's most likely because there's some emotional turmoil that they're trying to conceal from everyone else.
最后也可能是最重要的一点，如果某人很容易心烦意乱，但平时并不是这样的状态，那么很可能是因为他们想要想其他人隐瞒一些情绪上的混乱。
It's especially troubling if this person is usually level-headed, calm and mild-mannered, but has suddenly become easily distressed or angered.
如果这个人平时头脑冷静、举止温和，但突然变得很容易沮丧或生气，那么这就非常令人不安了。
They're now quick to snap at those around them or cry over something that wasn't meant to hurt their feelings.
现在的他们会对周围的人发火，或者为一些无意伤害他们感情的事情哭泣。
And the moment you try to comfort them or tell them to calm down, they'll start to insist that everything's fine, that it's nothing, but you should know better than to fall for it.
当你想要安慰他们或者让他们冷静下来的时候，他们会开始坚持说一切都好，没什么，但你应该知道不要轻信。
So, do you relate to any of these signs we've mentioned here? Did anyone in particular come to mind while watching this video?
那么，你身边存在有这种迹象的人吗？你在看这个视频的时候有没有想到某个人呢？
If you have a friend, family member, or a loved one in your life, you think maybe struggling with feelings of serious unhappiness or depression, don't hesitate to reach out to them and offer a helping hand.
如果你生活中有朋友、家庭成员或爱人，你认为他们可能正在和极度的不快乐或沮丧作斗争，一定要向他们伸出援手。
Lend them a sympathetic ear, and reassure them that you're here for them in these troubling times.
同情地倾听他们的诉说，让他们相信在自己困难的时候你会在他们身边。
Most of all, try to help them get in touch with a mental health care professional as a way of showing your support.
最重要的是，要试着帮助他们联系心理健康专家，以此来表示你的支持。
