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This is not real. This is not real. This is not real. This isn't happening.
这不是真的。这不是真的。这不是真的。这不会发生的。
Kate, tell me this isn't really happening.
凯特，告诉我这不是真的。
I hear there's something you don't like the looks of.
我听说有些让你不爽的事情。
We discovered a very large comet.
我们发现了一颗很大的彗星。
Oh, good for you.
哦，还不错啊。
It's headed directly towards Earth.
它在冲地球飞来。
This comet is what we call a planet killer.
这颗彗星就是我们所说的星球杀手。
At this exact moment, I say we sit tight and assess.
此时此刻，我建议我们先静观其变。
Sit tight and assess? Sit tight? And then assess.
静观其变？先按兵不动，再评估？
The sit tight part comes first. Then you got to digest it. That's the assessment period.
按兵不动是第一位的。然后你得消化这个消息。需要一个评估期。
This is the worst news in the history of humanity. They blew us off.
这是人类历史上最坏的消息。他们根本不在乎我们。
What do we do? We have to release the information.
我们该怎么办？我们必须公布这个信息。
So we just leak it.
所以我们直接把它泄露出去。
Our guests today have made a pretty big discovery in space.
今天的嘉宾在太空中有了重大发现。
How big is this thing? Can it destroy my ex-wife's house? Is that possible?
这个东西有多大？它能毁掉我前妻的房子吗？有这个可能吗？
There's a 100% chance that we're all going to die! Kate? Okay.
我们都百分之百会死的！凯特？好的。
Well, the handsome astronomer can come back anytime, but the yelling lady, not so much.
好吧，英俊的天文学家可以随时回来，但是那个大吼大叫的女士，就还是不要了。
We're gonna get the news out, one way or another.
不管怎样，我们都要把消息传出去。
It's real and it's coming.
这是真的，而且它就要来了。
FBI!
联邦调查局！
Jesus Christ, you could have just called me.
天啊，你们可以直接给我打电话啊。
This comet contains 30 trillion dollars' worth of material.
这颗彗星内含有价值30万亿美元的物质。
What do trillions of dollars matter if we're all gonna die?
如果我们都要死了，几万亿美元又有什么用？
Oh no, what if we're rich? That would be terrible!
哦，不，如果我们很富有会怎样呢？太可怕了！
Let's do this!
我们上吧！
You guys discovered a comet? I have a tattoo of a shooting star on my back.
你们发现了一颗彗星？我背上有个流星纹身。
Oh, that's terrific.
哦，那太棒了。
This could be a complete disaster.
这可能是一场大灾难。
This is already a disaster.
这已经是一场灾难了。
Are you that girl from TV that said we're all gonna die? No. Yo, bro! What up?
你就是那个在电视上说我们都会死掉的女孩吗？不是。哟，伙计！怎么样？
You'll never take me alive!
你休想活捉我！
There it is! A giant comet hurtling its way towards the Earth! Can you see it?
在这里！一颗巨大的彗星冲向地球！你能看到吗？
I can't! My head is in a bag!
我不能！我的头在袋子里！
I did have the FBI put that bag over your head. They don't do that. The CIA does, but I made them do it.
我确实让联邦调查局把袋子罩在你头上了。他们不会那样做的。这通常是中情局做的，但是我让他们这么做的。
You know, I had a feeling.
我就知道。
It's a good feeling, 'cause that is what I did. It was funny and cool.
这预感很好，因为就是我做的。这很有趣也很酷。
