几天前情人节才刚过，小伙伴们都是怎么过的？

身边有“大撒狗粮”的，也有自己一个人潇洒浪漫的。

但我也相信很多人既不是那种婚姻爱情幸福甜蜜的状态, 也不是母胎单身, 而是有约会对象；

但是似乎就是那种若即若离, 没有确定下来的关系.

Now we've just gone through Valentine's Day, did you celebrate with your significant other？Are you still single？

Or are you in a situation where you are dating someone but it's not exactly a relationship.

You and your partner have fun together and may even be intimate, physically and emotionally.

But you haven't made a commitment to each other or even discuss the future together.

Now you have the exact word in English to describe just that.

所以今天的Buzzword我们就来说说, 英文里用来形容 “友人以上, 恋人未满” 的这个词Situationship.

Situationship is a combination of situation and relationship.

So if you are dating someone, but when people ask you whether you are in a relationship, your answer is, well, it's complicated.

Then you're probably in a situationship.

Situationship

Less than a relationship, but more than a casual encounter or friends with benefit, a situationship refers to a romantic relationship that is and remains undefined.

其实要说situationship它最大的特点就是还没有定性；

两个人在一起很亲密, 会做很多恋人做的事儿, 但是并没有所谓正规的名分, 也没有正式的讨论过将来.

And apparently this is becoming a trend, especially in the young generation.

Now if you look at the society nowadays, our expectations of relationship has changed.

People are getting married later in life and many people are eager to explore relationships in a less structured way without pressure to commit as they prioritize self-knowledge and developing as individuals.

那之所以situationship会成为一个潮流, 主要是因为现代人特别是年轻人的婚恋观出现了很大的改变.

人们越来越晚婚, 而且比起感情婚姻承诺这些东西, 更愿意去考虑个人自身的发展.

Especially Gen-Z, 特别是Z世代, 也就是相当于中国的95后00后, they take an especially pragmatic approach to love and sex, and subsequently aren't prioritizing establishing committed romantic relationships the same way their older peers once did.

他们对于婚恋性爱的观点倾向于更加实用主义, 用句更通俗的话来讲, 可能就是“谈恋爱不如搞钱重要”.

That doesn't mean however that they're not expressing interest in romance and intimacy entirely.

Rather they're finding new ways to satisfy those wants and needs that fit better into their lives.

Now because this is such an increasingly popular trend, the term Situationship after starting to gain notable traction late in 2020, has hit an all-time high in Google search traffic last year.

而Situationship这个词也从2020年底就开始被人逐渐的关注, 一直到去年在Google Search上面的热度是一路飙升.

Having said all that, how do you know if you're in a situationship not a relationship, here are some of the characteristics of a situationship.

01 Situationship 的特点

如果你不知道自己的关系到底是不是属于situationship, 可以根据以下几个特点来看看你有没有躺枪.

First of all, a situationship is undefined, 关系没有定性.

You and your partner may not have had the “what are we” conversation to define a relationship. You don't really know if you’re boyfriend girlfriend, lovers, or what are you.

Number two, there's no consistency, 无法有稳定的预期.

It can be hard to know what to expect from your partner.

For instance, you may not know when you're gonna see them next, how long they're going to take to respond to your text and so on and so forth.

基本上什么见面回信息都是随缘.

There is no mention of the future. 不言未来.

The connection between you two is superficial. 两个人之间的链接和交流比较浅层.

You may spend time together or maybe even be intimate. But you may not have developed a deep emotional connection, or had any meaningful in depth conversation.

Number five, the relationship is based on convenience. 方便才见, 不会优先考虑对方.

You and your partner may not prioritize each other or go out of your way to see each other. Instead, you may tend to make spur of the moment plans based on convenience.

一般见面都是我今天正好有空, 咱们一起看个电影吃个饭, 很少会专门推掉别的事情去安排约会.

And also the relationship may not be exclusive, 并不是或者不一定是一对一的关系.

You may not even have discussed exclusivity and one or both of you may be dating other people.

02 Situationship VS Relationship

Now, like I said earlier, Gen Zers or the younger generation, they're increasingly embracing this less than steady relationship called situationship, maybe because they are more focused on the search of personal professional and financial stability rather than a committed relationship.

So of course there are advantages and drawbacks of a situationship.

既然有那么多人想要谈situationship而不是relationship, 它必然有它的好处.

Advantages

The biggest advantage of a situationship is that there is less responsibility.

People who tend to gravitate towards situationships are those who want the emotional connection and intimacy in a compartmentalized way.

Compartmentalized指的是那种可以非常清晰划分自己生活情感的人, 就是非常拎得清, 基本上属于恋爱脑的反面.

They can have emotional presence and connection in person; but when apart, they can have their own freedom.

追求的是见面享受亲密感, 分开有自己的独立空间.

A situationship in this sense can offer a fun, stress-free way to enjoy the benefits of a relationship without a major emotional commitment.

Disadvantages

But there are many disadvantages. One of the major disadvantages of a situationship is that you and your partner may have different expectations for the relationship.

Maybe you expected to be more serious or maybe your partner does.

Even if you agreed on this situationship dynamics, when you entered the situationship, one person might grow to want more from it than the other is willing to give.

这种situationship里面最大的问题也就是两个人的需求不对等, 或者开始对等后来逐渐的一个人会想要的更多, 而另外一个人给不了.

It can also be stressful to be in a relationship without stability or consistency.

特别是如果你是那种很需要安定感安全感的人, 从这样的situationship里面你大概率会找不到.

What to do if you find yourself in a situationship rather than relationship.

It's very important to be honest about your feelings and to be very open to ask for what you want and to communicate your position.

If you feel like the situationship is not enough for you, make sure that you avoid the passive approach, and just openly talk to your partner about it and see if he or she is willing to take the next step.

Remember whatever type of relationship we're in, ultimately, it is to make our life better.

Now let's move on to the sample sentence.

新词拓展

Example 1：

-The younger generations are increasingly gravitating towards the romantic grey area known as situationships.