Friends老友记 Episode 1013:The One Where Joey Speaks French
eling comforted and satisfied!
Ross: (acknowledging the last part of her sentence) Well...
Rachel: Oh stop that!
Ross: I can't believe this. I was just being a good guy. I treated you with respect and understanding.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, that is so hot. (She walks around him to the other side)
<">Ross: Hey, I was looking out for you.
Rachel: Oh, really, well Ross, you know what? I am a big girl. I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
Ross: I gotta say, I have not had sex a lot of times before, this is the worst ever.
Rachel: Oh, really, really? Well, it wasn't very good for me either. (She turns to leave and Ross over takes her and stands infront on her, his back to the row of doors leading to the hospital rooms)
Ross: Hey you know what? You know what? To avoid this little thing in the future, let's just say, you and me, never having sex again.
Rachel: What?
Ross: That's right, sex is off the table. (The door starts to open behind him and Dr. Green emerges) I am never having sex with you again. (Rachel stays quiet and after a few moments Ross realizes what has happened. He turns abruptly) Dr. Green, are you feeling better? (Rachel's dad glares at him with a deadly look)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica and Erica enter, Chandler is in the kitchen.]
Chandler: Hey! How was lunch?
Erica: (To Chandler) We had a good time. By the way, I wanted to ask you something. It would really mean a lot to me, if the baby was a boy, that you name him after my father, Jiminy Billy Bob (Monica smiles at Chandler and he looks shocked and scared, getting no support from his wife)
Chandler: (struggling) Oh, really?
Erica: No! (To Monica) You we're right, that was fun! I'm gonna go finish packing.
Chandler: O-okay. (steps closer to Monica and speaks softly) So, is she gonna take the test?
Monica: Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
Chandler: Oh God. It's shovely-Joe, isn't it?
Monica: (smiling) No it's not.
Chandler: How do you know?
Erica: Well, it turns out that Erica didn't pay much attention in Sex Ed class, because the thing she did with that prison guy... it'd be pretty hard to make a baby that way.
Chandler: Oh God! What was it? The thing that we hardly ever do or the thing we never do?
Monica: The thing we never do.
Chandler: (nods in appreciation) Shovely Joe!
[Scene: The theatre where Joey is auditioning. Phoebe enters when Joey's on stage and she sits down. He hasn't seen her.]
Director: Whenever you're ready Joey.
Joey: Right. (clears his throat) Dja bu bu Claude. Uh, c'est la pu les la lu blah bloo.
Casting assistant: I'm sorry, what's going on?
Joey: Dude, come on! French it u-up!
Director: Joey, do you speak French?
Joey: Toutes la smore! Bu blu-ay bloo blah ooh! Pfoof!
Director: You know what. I think this audition is over. (Joey looks disappointed, but understands.)
Phoebe: (in a French accent) Uh, excuse me. Uh, I am Reginé Philange. I was passing by when I heard this man speaking the regional dialect of my French town of Estée Lauder.
Director: You really think this man is speaking French?
Joey: Sa-sa-saw!
Phoebe: écoutez, je vais vous dire la vérité. C'est mon petit frère. Il est un peu retardé. (Translation: Listen, I will tell you the truth. He's my little bother. He's a bit retarded.)
(The director looks at Joey and he nods.)
<">Phoebe: Alors, si vous pouviez jouer le jeu avec lui... (Translation: So, would you please just humor him?)
Director: (to Joey) Good job, little buddy. That was some really good French. But I think we're gonna go with someone else for the part.
Joey: Ah. All right. But my French was good?
Director: It was great.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Oh-hoh! Ha-hah! See!
Phoebe: (to the director) Merci. Au revoir. (Translation: Thanks, goodbye.)
Joey: Yeah-hah. Toute-de-le-fruit.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment.
Ross: (acknowledging the last part of her sentence) Well...
Rachel: Oh stop that!
Ross: I can't believe this. I was just being a good guy. I treated you with respect and understanding.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, that is so hot. (She walks around him to the other side)
<">Ross: Hey, I was looking out for you.
Rachel: Oh, really, well Ross, you know what? I am a big girl. I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
Ross: I gotta say, I have not had sex a lot of times before, this is the worst ever.
Rachel: Oh, really, really? Well, it wasn't very good for me either. (She turns to leave and Ross over takes her and stands infront on her, his back to the row of doors leading to the hospital rooms)
Ross: Hey you know what? You know what? To avoid this little thing in the future, let's just say, you and me, never having sex again.
Rachel: What?
Ross: That's right, sex is off the table. (The door starts to open behind him and Dr. Green emerges) I am never having sex with you again. (Rachel stays quiet and after a few moments Ross realizes what has happened. He turns abruptly) Dr. Green, are you feeling better? (Rachel's dad glares at him with a deadly look)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica and Erica enter, Chandler is in the kitchen.]
Chandler: Hey! How was lunch?
Erica: (To Chandler) We had a good time. By the way, I wanted to ask you something. It would really mean a lot to me, if the baby was a boy, that you name him after my father, Jiminy Billy Bob (Monica smiles at Chandler and he looks shocked and scared, getting no support from his wife)
Chandler: (struggling) Oh, really?
Erica: No! (To Monica) You we're right, that was fun! I'm gonna go finish packing.
Chandler: O-okay. (steps closer to Monica and speaks softly) So, is she gonna take the test?
Monica: Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
Chandler: Oh God. It's shovely-Joe, isn't it?
Monica: (smiling) No it's not.
Chandler: How do you know?
Erica: Well, it turns out that Erica didn't pay much attention in Sex Ed class, because the thing she did with that prison guy... it'd be pretty hard to make a baby that way.
Chandler: Oh God! What was it? The thing that we hardly ever do or the thing we never do?
Monica: The thing we never do.
Chandler: (nods in appreciation) Shovely Joe!
[Scene: The theatre where Joey is auditioning. Phoebe enters when Joey's on stage and she sits down. He hasn't seen her.]
Director: Whenever you're ready Joey.
Joey: Right. (clears his throat) Dja bu bu Claude. Uh, c'est la pu les la lu blah bloo.
Casting assistant: I'm sorry, what's going on?
Joey: Dude, come on! French it u-up!
Director: Joey, do you speak French?
Joey: Toutes la smore! Bu blu-ay bloo blah ooh! Pfoof!
Director: You know what. I think this audition is over. (Joey looks disappointed, but understands.)
Phoebe: (in a French accent) Uh, excuse me. Uh, I am Reginé Philange. I was passing by when I heard this man speaking the regional dialect of my French town of Estée Lauder.
Director: You really think this man is speaking French?
Joey: Sa-sa-saw!
Phoebe: écoutez, je vais vous dire la vérité. C'est mon petit frère. Il est un peu retardé. (Translation: Listen, I will tell you the truth. He's my little bother. He's a bit retarded.)
(The director looks at Joey and he nods.)
<">Phoebe: Alors, si vous pouviez jouer le jeu avec lui... (Translation: So, would you please just humor him?)
Director: (to Joey) Good job, little buddy. That was some really good French. But I think we're gonna go with someone else for the part.
Joey: Ah. All right. But my French was good?
Director: It was great.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Oh-hoh! Ha-hah! See!
Phoebe: (to the director) Merci. Au revoir. (Translation: Thanks, goodbye.)
Joey: Yeah-hah. Toute-de-le-fruit.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment.
