Friends老友记 Episode 1014:The One With Princess Consuela
can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Mike: Woo-wo-hey-hey-hey... Can we not talk about that right now?
Phoebe: All right, prude... Look, Monica and Chandler really love this house. You are not gonna talk them into staying here.
Joey: Hey, hey... I can convince people to do anything, you know. I bet I can even get Mike to do that "thing". What is it?
(Phoebe whispers something in Joey's ear, but after hearing it he jumps up, shocked)
Joey: I AM NOT GONNA HELP YOU DO THAT! Goodbye! (he leaves)
[Scene: A restaurant. Rachel enters.]
Rachel: (to maitre d') Hi, I'm here to see Mr. Campbell... with Gucci. The reservation is probably under Gucci. It's spelled like Gukki, which could be confusing.
Maitre d': Mr. Campbell's not here yet. Let me show you to his table.
(They walk to the table, but Rachel suddenly gasps. Sitting there is Mr. Zellner, her boss from her current job at Ralph Lauren.)
Rachel: Oh my God! That's my boss. You have to seat us somewhere else.
Maitre d': I'm sorry. That's always Mr. Campbell's table.
Rachel: But my... but my boss cannot see me. I'm interviewing for another job.
Maitre d': I know. With Gukki
Rachel: Sssshhhh!
Mr Zellner: Rachel?
Rachel: Hi... I'm on a date...
Mr Zellner: (confused) That's great!
Rachel: Yeah, it is. Yeah, you know, it's tough. Single mom, career... You gotta get out there.
Mr Zellner: Well, you got uhm... good energy.
Rachel: Oh.
Mr Campbell: Rachel?
Rachel: Yes, hi!
Mr Campbell: James Campbell...
Rachel: Hi! (to Mr. Zellner) Excuse us.
Mr Campbell: Please... (shows her to sit)
Rachel: Okay. Oh, yeah... (whispering to Mr. Zellner) Oh he's cute!
Mr Campbell: So... your resumé is quite impressive. (Mr Zellner who sits behind Rachel shrugs)
Rachel: Wha... My resumé? I wouldn't... I wouldn't call my online dating profile a resumé.
Mr Campbell: Dating profile? I-I-I'm talking about the work resumé.
Rachel: (starts singing la la la la) Whatever happened to just singing for no reason? Huh?
Mr Campbell: Maybe people... found it weird.... So, why do you want to leave Ralph Lauren?
Rachel: What? I-I don't.
Mr Campbell: You don't?
Rachel: No, I-I-I love it there.
Mr Campbell: Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
(Rachel mimes and mouths to Mr. Campbell "That is my boss", pointing to Mr. Zellner)
Mr Campbell: What?
(Rachel now silently whispers "That's my boss".)
Mr Campbell: That's Hugo Boss?
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr. Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
[Scene: A counter at a government building. Phoebe's waiting in line.]
Phoebe: (to the woman behind her) This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself. (she turns around and the clerk behind the counter heard her.) But you obviously haven't.
Clerk: How can I help you?
Phoebe: I need to change my name, please. See, I need to change it because I'm-I'm hiding from the law. (the clerk shows no change in expression whatsoever) You're fun.
Clerk: You need to fill out this form. (motions for the next person in line)
Phoebe: Okay, well, I just don't, I don't know how it works exactly. See, my name is Buffay and my husband's name is Hannigan, so is it supposed to be Buffay-Hannigan or Hannigan-Buffay?
Clerk: It can be anything you want.
Phoebe: Well, not anything, I mean...
Clerk: Yeah... anything.
Phoebe: Oh, this could take a while.
Clerk: Get out of my line.
Phoebe: Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Hey Pheebs.
Phoebe: Oh, not anymore. I changed it today.
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry, Mrs. Hannigan.
Phoebe: Wrong again! Apparently you can change it to anything you want. So I though
Mike: Woo-wo-hey-hey-hey... Can we not talk about that right now?
Phoebe: All right, prude... Look, Monica and Chandler really love this house. You are not gonna talk them into staying here.
Joey: Hey, hey... I can convince people to do anything, you know. I bet I can even get Mike to do that "thing". What is it?
(Phoebe whispers something in Joey's ear, but after hearing it he jumps up, shocked)
Joey: I AM NOT GONNA HELP YOU DO THAT! Goodbye! (he leaves)
[Scene: A restaurant. Rachel enters.]
Rachel: (to maitre d') Hi, I'm here to see Mr. Campbell... with Gucci. The reservation is probably under Gucci. It's spelled like Gukki, which could be confusing.
Maitre d': Mr. Campbell's not here yet. Let me show you to his table.
(They walk to the table, but Rachel suddenly gasps. Sitting there is Mr. Zellner, her boss from her current job at Ralph Lauren.)
Rachel: Oh my God! That's my boss. You have to seat us somewhere else.
Maitre d': I'm sorry. That's always Mr. Campbell's table.
Rachel: But my... but my boss cannot see me. I'm interviewing for another job.
Maitre d': I know. With Gukki
Rachel: Sssshhhh!
Mr Zellner: Rachel?
Rachel: Hi... I'm on a date...
Mr Zellner: (confused) That's great!
Rachel: Yeah, it is. Yeah, you know, it's tough. Single mom, career... You gotta get out there.
Mr Zellner: Well, you got uhm... good energy.
Rachel: Oh.
Mr Campbell: Rachel?
Rachel: Yes, hi!
Mr Campbell: James Campbell...
Rachel: Hi! (to Mr. Zellner) Excuse us.
Mr Campbell: Please... (shows her to sit)
Rachel: Okay. Oh, yeah... (whispering to Mr. Zellner) Oh he's cute!
Mr Campbell: So... your resumé is quite impressive. (Mr Zellner who sits behind Rachel shrugs)
Rachel: Wha... My resumé? I wouldn't... I wouldn't call my online dating profile a resumé.
Mr Campbell: Dating profile? I-I-I'm talking about the work resumé.
Rachel: (starts singing la la la la) Whatever happened to just singing for no reason? Huh?
Mr Campbell: Maybe people... found it weird.... So, why do you want to leave Ralph Lauren?
Rachel: What? I-I don't.
Mr Campbell: You don't?
Rachel: No, I-I-I love it there.
Mr Campbell: Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
(Rachel mimes and mouths to Mr. Campbell "That is my boss", pointing to Mr. Zellner)
Mr Campbell: What?
(Rachel now silently whispers "That's my boss".)
Mr Campbell: That's Hugo Boss?
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr. Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
[Scene: A counter at a government building. Phoebe's waiting in line.]
Phoebe: (to the woman behind her) This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself. (she turns around and the clerk behind the counter heard her.) But you obviously haven't.
Clerk: How can I help you?
Phoebe: I need to change my name, please. See, I need to change it because I'm-I'm hiding from the law. (the clerk shows no change in expression whatsoever) You're fun.
Clerk: You need to fill out this form. (motions for the next person in line)
Phoebe: Okay, well, I just don't, I don't know how it works exactly. See, my name is Buffay and my husband's name is Hannigan, so is it supposed to be Buffay-Hannigan or Hannigan-Buffay?
Clerk: It can be anything you want.
Phoebe: Well, not anything, I mean...
Clerk: Yeah... anything.
Phoebe: Oh, this could take a while.
Clerk: Get out of my line.
Phoebe: Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Hey Pheebs.
Phoebe: Oh, not anymore. I changed it today.
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry, Mrs. Hannigan.
Phoebe: Wrong again! Apparently you can change it to anything you want. So I though
