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How to Annoy Your Co-workers
怎样惹怒同事
1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17-inch paper, 99 copies.
1. 将复印机设置为缩印一半的大小，加黑，A3纸，复印99份。
2. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
2. 在任何天气情况下都开着前风挡雨刷，好让它随时“在调试中”。
3. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
3. 对别人说的事都报以“这只是你的想法”的回答。
4. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
4. 用“根据预言所说”来结束你所有的发言。
5. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
5. 用双手使劲捂住耳朵来暗示谈话该结束了。
6. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
6. 把纸张从中间装订起来。
7. Ask your co-workers what gender they are.
7. 问同事们他们的性别。
8. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
8. 做陈述的过程中，不时地像鹦鹉一样点点头。
9. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. 练习发出传真机和“猫”的声音。
10. During meetings, disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
10. 开会时，拆开你的笔，“不小心”把笔芯弹出来。
11. ALWAYS TYPE WITH CAPS-LOCK ON
11. 全部用大写字母打出
12. type only in lower case
12. 全部用小写字母打出
13. Don'tuseanypunctuationeither
13. 不要使用标点符号或空格
14. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook.
14. 问同事们诡秘的问题，然后把他们的回答记在小本子上。
15. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
15. 嘟嘟囔囔一些诸如“心理侧面图”之类的东西。
