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The most important phrase you'll ever say in a meeting isn't "Please" or "Thank you." It isn't "How are you?" to open the meeting or "What are the next steps?" to close the meeting. No, the most important phrase you'll ever say in a meeting is:
你在会面时说的最重要的一句话并不是会面开始时的“请”或“谢谢”，也不是会面结束时的“下一步是什么？”。非也，你在会面时说的最重要的一句话是：
How can I help you?
我能为你效劳吗？
My father-in-law taught me to show your friendship first. There's no better way to show that you care about the person you're meeting with than to genuinely, authentically ask her what you can do to help.
我的岳父教导我要先展现自己的友好。没有什么比真诚地问你会见的人你有什么能为他做的更能显示你的关心了。
There are two possibilities when you ask how you can help:
当你这么问时有两种可能：
1) The person will tell you, thereby giving you an opportunity to help, after which the person you helped will feel compelled to return the favor, and help you.
1）此人会告诉你，从而给了你帮助他的机会。那以后他会觉得有义务回报你的好意，于是也帮助你。
2) The person won't tell you, instead politely declining, but then she will still feel like you care, and will be emotionally invested in helping you.
2）此人不会告诉你，相反会礼貌地拒绝，但是她会因此觉得你关心她，所以在那之后会在感情上倾向于帮助你。
Either way, establishing that you care and that you're there to help is a powerful emotional bond. It's a paradox, I know - you're not meeting with someone to find out how you can help, you're likely meeting to get something sold, or bought, or done. But it's through helping that you'll gain trust, and eventually, influence.
不论如何，表达你关心对方而且你随时准备好了帮助对方是一个非常有效的感情纽带。我知道这是个悖论。你并不是为了看看你有什么能帮助某人的才去和他会面的，你可能只是去卖些什么、买些什么或者做件什么生意。但通过帮助，你能收获信任，最终获得影响力。
Nine months ago, Michael Kislin, a financial advisor, met with me for the first time, and asked me, "How can I help you?" I told him about my startup venture Likeable Local, and said I could use some introductions to technology investors. He asked me a bunch of questions to learn more, and soon after, introduced me to several people he thought could help me. Then I called him to thank him, and thought to ask him to tell me more about what he did. I soon became a client of Michael's.
九个月前，迈克尔·基斯林，一位金融顾问，第一次与我见面，他问我：“有什么能为你效劳的？”我告诉他关于我在Likeable Local创业的事，并且告诉他我要为技术投资人准备一些介绍。他问了我大量的问题，随后他介绍了我一些他认为能帮到我的人。之后我打了个电话给他谢谢他，并且请他告诉我更多关于他所做的工作的事情。不久后我成为了他的客户。
Three weeks ago, I met with an employee for a 1-on-1 for the first time, and asked her, "How can I help you?" She told me how I could help make her job easier, more productive and more efficient. I helped her, and now she's more productive than ever before.
三周前，我第一次1对1地会见了一位员工，并问她：“有什么能为你效劳的？”她告诉了我怎么做能够帮助她使她的工作更轻松、更有效率。我帮了她，而她现在比以往任何时候都更有效率。
If it seems simple, it is. It doesn't matter whether it's a customer, a prospect, or a colleague you're meeting with - we all like to be cared about, and we all can use some help. Just make sure you're genuine, never contrived, and ask in your next meeting, "How can I help you?"
要是这看上去很简单，确实是。不论你会见的是一位顾客，一位发展对象还是同事。我们都喜欢被关心，而我们也都能够提供一些帮助。只是要确保你很真诚，从不做作，从下次会面开始问，“我能为你效劳吗？”
