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Dear Liz: A co-worker and I have just started dating. I want to keep it secret (who knows how long it will last), but he feels we are better off being upfront. He's not my manager, but he does manage a team I'm friendly with and work with frequently. What's the best course of action? Hush-hush or here-we-are? - J.M., 25
亲爱的丽兹：我最近和同事约会了。我想要保守这个秘密（毕竟谁知道这段恋情能持续多久呢），但他觉得公开这段感情对我俩都好。他不是我的经理，但他的确管理着一个团队。我和他的团队关系很好，也经常一起工作。最佳行动方案是什么呢？是保密还是公开？--25岁的J.M.
Dear J.M.: Workplace romance is a very tricky issue. Thankfully we've evolved from the days when most office romances were between secretaries and bosses which was not exactly politically correct. Not to mention the old "she slept her way to the top" theory that didn't help women if they started to like a co-worker. Today, the line between work life and personal life which was once black and white has now become many shades of gray. In some cases, our life has become our work or some semblance of it. And how could it not be when we spend far more time at work building those relationships than anywhere else in our lives? It doesn't lend us much time to meet other people and build other communities.
亲爱的J.M.：办公室恋情是件非常棘手的问题。还好，现在的办公室恋情已经不是美女秘书恋上老板了，那样的感情在政治上是不对的。更别提人们常说的老话了"她是因为和老板睡过才坐到今天的位置的"，所以如果是和同事约会，其他人就不会说闲话了。而今，以往黑白分明的私人生活和工作生活已经变成了灰色区域。在某些情况下，我们的生活变成了我们的工作或和工作有点类似。所以，当时间都花在工作上时，我们怎么可能还在其它地方和别人谈恋爱呢？我们根本就没有太多的时间和他人约会或建立自己的社交网啊。
Additionally, Millennials (now the largest generation in the workforce) are shifting the culture with their desire for more collaboration and common spaces; it's no wonder socializing at work is on the rise. A recent Vault.com study revealed that 57% of people have participated in some type of office relationship.
此外，千禧一代（工作场所中人数最多的一代）正在转变文化，他们希望有更多的合作和共享空间，因此，在工作中社交也就不足为奇了。Vault.com最近的一项研究揭示：57%的人都有过办公室恋情。
With that said, this is definitely not a *green light* for people to start dating on a whim. Office romances need to be handled very delicately by identifying what phase you are in and adhering to the following guidelines:
话虽这么说，但对于一时兴起而约会的人来说这绝非"绿灯"。你需要非常细腻的判定自己所处的恋爱阶段，遵守以下的准则，这样才能妥善处理好办公室恋情。
Phase 1: A Budding Romance
第一阶段：恋情萌芽
If you are in Phase 1-feeling the flutters but not sure if it will go the distance-be cautious:
如果你正处于第一阶段--感到飘飘然，但不确定这段感情会走多远：
Keep it quiet in the early stages: This is between you and your romantic interest only. Do not let other people connected to your work know about it even if they are good at "keeping secrets." It's not fair or smart to bring anyone else in, word travels fast and your reputation is on the line.
早期阶段保密：这件事只能你和你的约会对象知道。不要让其他和你有工作关系的人知晓，即使这些人很会保密也不行。让其他人参与进来是不公平的，也是不明智的，因为谣言总是散播的很快，到时候你有可能名声不保。
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