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1. You doubt your partner all the time.
1．你总是怀疑另一半。
It's hard to watch your parents go through a divorce or a rocky time, especially if you were younger when it happened. Although most studies show that divorce doesn't eternally "mess up" children any more than those whose parents remain married, it can create some anxiety issues, which can later be translated into a general fear of commitment or rejection, according to Psychology Today. Since you know that a marriages can, and do, end, your attachment styles might be all over the place, depending on how secure you feel with another person.
眼睁睁的看着父母离婚或看着他们度过一段艰难时期并非易事，如果这些情况在你年幼时发生，那么情况更是如此。虽然很多研究表明，与父母没有离婚的孩子相比，父母离婚的孩子并没有被离婚永远"搞砸"，但离婚会造成一些焦虑问题，后期可能会转化为对承诺或拒绝的普遍恐惧，《今日心理学》杂志表示。既然你知道婚姻可以也必定终结，那么你的依恋风格可能十分随意，取决于另一个人带给你的安全感。
2. You talk to everyone *but* your partner.
2. 你向每个人诉说衷肠，但这些人却不包括你的另一半。
No one's perfect, but communication styles are one of the first things we pick up on as kids and teenagers. If your parents weren't good at coming together and hashing things out with each other, or if you didn't see any of that bonding, you might not have picked up on how important talking really is. If your parents were great at complaining about each other to anyone who would listen, you might find yourself talking about your relationship to friends instead of going right to the source with your needs.
人无完人，但沟通方式是孩童时代（儿童和青少年时期）就首先学会的事情。如果你的父母不善于聚在一起、总是怼对方，或者你看不见他们之间的情感纽带，那你可能还没有认识到谈话的重要性。如果你的父母非常善于向那些愿意倾听的人抱怨对方，那么你也可能会和你的朋友谈论你们的恋情，而不是带着你的需求直接找另一半交流。
Richard Weissbourd, the psychologist behind the Harvard University study about talking to kids about love, recommended that parents have their kids watch shows with "good" marriages, like Friday Night Lights and Blackish. That sounds totally silly, but if your parents weren't great at disagreeing with each other, you might want to channel when it comes to talking about your needs in a relationship.
哈佛大学一项研究（和孩子谈论爱）的心理学家理查德·韦斯伯德建议父母给孩子看一些婚姻幸福美满的电视节目，比如《胜利之光》和《喜新不厌旧》。虽说听起来很蠢，但如果你的父母不擅长顶撞对方，那在感情需求方面，你可能想要换个频道。
3. You withhold information.
3. 你对信息有所保留。
Just like gossiping about your partner's bad habits can be a sign of bad communication, so is hiding things from your main squeeze. You know the old "don't tell mom" trope? You have to kick the idea of thinking that some things are better left unsaid. Dr. Michele Kerulis, professor of counseling at Northwestern University told Bustle that little white lies can lead to major trust issues.
就像闲聊另一半的坏习惯可能是沟通不良的迹象一样，对另一半有所保留也是一个迹象。你知道这句老话吗"不要告诉我妈"？你不能再继续认为有些话还是不说为好了。美国西北大学的咨询教授迈克尔·克瑞斯医生对Bustle说道，善意的谎言可能会造成重大的信任问题。
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