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Honey, this will help.
宝贝，吃点这个，你会好受点。
So, I finally catch up to her and she says this relationship is going too fast and we have to slow down.
我追上她，然后她说…这段感情发展太快我们得放慢脚步。
Uff.
哦。
That is never good
那绝不是好事。
Then I got all needy and clingy.
于是我就变得，很空虚又很黏人。
Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe it's not so bad. How did you leave it?
等等，或许不算太糟。你们怎么结束的？
She said she'd call me.
她说她会再打给我。
Ohh!
哦。
Oh God.
哦天啊。
Welcome to our side of the tunnel.
恭喜你到我们这一国来。
This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
对了，这个冰淇淋味道好烂。
Yeah, well that's that lo-cal, non dairy, soy milk junk. We sort of, we save the real stuff for those really terminal cases.
因为这是低卡无乳脂豆浆制的假冰淇淋，我们把真正的留到实在无法挽留了才吃。
You know, when you start get screwed over all the time, you gotta switch to low-fat.
若你一直被搞得一团糟你就要换成低脂的。
Yeah, you do.
没错，你得这么做。
So, you don't think I'm terminal?
你不认为我已无法挽留了？
Well, no, not at all, you're not terminal, you just, you just need some damage control.
不尽然，你并非无法挽留我们只要防止事情恶化。
Okay, okay. So, should I call her?
好，我该打电话给她吗？
Nooo!
不。
This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone,
这段时间很重要，一旦你发现自己的手又伸向电话，
then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
你就去买鞋子，不然就洗个泡泡浴，若你希望她回来你就得开始表现冷漠。
She has to know that your not needy.
她必须知道你不是那么需要她。
Right. So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into her on purpose.
And then act aloof.
所以你要做的就是，假装不经意地碰到她，然后表现得很冷漠。
So I'm not, not gonna lose her?
这样我就不会失去她了？
Oooh, honey, you're not a total loser.
甜心，你不是个弱者啊。
I said, 'So I'm not gonna lose her?'
我是说“我就不会失去她了？”
Oh.
哦。
