评论
打印
CHRIS ROCK: 1983 was my first Valentine's Day as a teenager.
1983年我还正处青春期 那是我过的第一个情人节
I never really cared about Valentine's Day before,
之前我对情人节这个概念不屑一顾
but now I couldn't ignore it.
但现在可大不一样了
Valentine's Day makes most people think
一提到情人节 大多数人想到的是
of flowers and candy,
鲜花和糖果
but it reminded me of the gangland massacre in Chicago.
不过我想到的是芝加哥的黑社会大屠杀
Happy Valentine's Day.
情人节快乐
Yesterday, those roses cost $10.
在昨天 这些玫瑰花还只要10美元
Today, they're $110.
几天却一路彪升到了110美元
Even when you're broke,
即使正在闹分手
you have to find a way to tell your woman you love her.
你也得想个法子向你的女友示爱
Hey!
嘿！
You picked the wrong wall today.
这可不是给你私用的
Even if it means getting the crap beat out of you.
即使这样做会招来一顿爆打
On Valentine's Day, love was in the air.
情人节这天 到处都弥漫着爱的气息
You should have seen what they did after they shot him.
倒霉的家伙 你真该看看他们爆打完你之后干了什么
Hey.
嘿
Hi. Happy Valentine's Day.
嗨 情人节快乐
Even at school, Valentine's Day was a big deal,
就连在学校也不例外
and it seemed like everybody
似乎每个人都有收获
was getting something except me.
除了我
Still a few days to go.
还有几天呢
We could still get a card.
我们还有机会能得到情人节卡片
That look means, "If we weren't friends,
换句话说 如果我们不是朋友的话
I'd smack the hope out of you."
我会跟你争女孩的
Hey, I got one. I got a Valentine's Day card.
嘿 有张给我的卡片 我有张情人节卡片！
Cool.
太棒了
Hey, if I got a card,
嘿 如果我也有卡片的话
I know you will.
你一定也有
What's it say?
上面写什么？
Roses are red, violets are blue, you stink like a monkey
玫瑰是红的 紫罗兰是蓝的 你的脸红得像猴子屁股
and look like one, too.
你真像个耍猴的
Happy Valey.
情人节愉快
So much for love in the air.
这就是“爱’的气息
CHRIS ROCK: I didn't have any luck with girls when I was 13.
在我13岁时 非常没有女孩缘
Mostly, I just had a bunch of crushes.
大多数时间 我受到的只是一连串的打击
They call it a crush, because chances are
这样说是 因为有可能
if you open your mouth, you're gonna get crushed.
你一开口就会把事弄得一团糟
他们可能已经提醒过 "她不喜欢你 傻瓜"
but "crush" is just quicker.
但糟糕事却总比预想的要来得快
That's Tangee Brown.
她是Tangee Brown.
Hi.
嗨
All she ever said to me was "hi."
她一共就和我说了这么一句话
That's all I needed.
光这样我已经很满足啦
After that, she became my Bus Crush.
在那之后 她就引发了校车事件
I call it a Bus Crush
我称之为校车事件
because this one happened on a bus.
是因为这回发生在校车上
One time I had an Elevator Crush.
曾经有一次 我在电梯里出了糗
I almost lost my head trying to follow her around.
为了她我可差点丢了脑袋
There was my Window Crush.
那次是我的偷窥丑事
The laws about that were a lot more relaxed at the time.
那时对偷窥事件 法律还没现在管的这么严
There was only one problem with my Bus Crush
对于校车事件 我只有一个麻烦
she had a boyfriend.
她有个男朋友
Why I got to be stupid?
为什么是我的错？
You're the one who lost your hat.
是你把帽子弄掉的
I lost it because I was trying to keep you
我弄掉了帽子是因为
from getting on the wrong bus.
你上错车了 而我要叫住你
Oh, so I'm dumb now?
这么说来 是我变迟钝了？
Yeah, Tangee.
是的 Tangee.
And you're getting on my nerves.
你把我惹毛了
Clyde 我的书还在你这
Here.
给你
You need to read them.
你需要读读
Maybe they'll teach you how to act.
也许你能学会怎么做人
This must be how the drummer felt
这一定就像
watching Ike and Tina fight.
鼓手看待 Ike和 Tina吵架一样 注：50年代tina与著名乐师出身的ike turner因音乐而结缘 并组成ike & tina turner乐
队 可惜因家庭暴力而以离婚告终
Thank you.
谢谢
You want to sit down?
你想坐吗
No, that's okay.
不 站着挺好
Oh, no, it's all right. I like to stand.
噢 没事 我喜欢站着
Thanks.
谢谢
At that moment, somebody could have sold me
那时真该有人给我张
a lifetime bus pass.
终生月票（不占座位 哈哈）
My mother loved Valentine's Day, and why not?
我妈妈喜欢情人节 有什么理由不喜欢呢？
I learned early on, Valentine's Day is not a day for couples.
我很久前就知道 情人节可不是为了情侣而存在
It's a day for women.
是为了女人而定的
If a woman shows up at a man's door empty-handed, big deal.
如果一个女人空手到男友家 稀客光临呀！
But if a man shows up empty-handed,
不过情况相反的话
he may as well not have shown up at all.
那就别再我眼皮底下出现了
Die, you pig!
去死吧 你这头猪！
He won't forget next year.
他会永生难忘的
ROCHELLE: Hello?
喂？
GIRL: Can I talk to Drew?
请问 Drew在吗
No, Drew can't come to the phone right now.
Drew现在不能接电话
We're having dinner.
我们在吃晚餐
I'm his Valentine.
我是他的女朋友
His who?
他的什么？
His Valentine. His only Valentine.
他的女朋友 唯一的女朋友
Okay, bye.
再见
Drew, you need to tell these fast little girls Drew
你得告诉这些乱七八糟的小姑娘
to stop this house all hours of the day and night.
别整天没完没了的烦我们
I told them already,
我已经告诉过她们了
Well, tell them again.
好吧 那就再告诉他们一次
They're all calling here talking about, "Well, tell him
她们都往这打电话要我转达
his Valentine called."
“他的女朋友来过电话了”
I don't have time for that mess.
我可没时间管这些闲事
Relax. Boy can't help it if he's popular.
放轻松点 对一个受欢迎的男生来说 这是势不可挡的
TONYA: Chris, how many Valentine cards Chris
目前为止
did you get so far?
你得到了多少张情人节卡片？
None.
一张也没有
How come girls don't like you?
为什么姑娘们不喜欢你？
Because none of your business, that's why.
因为那不关你事
Don't get mad at me.
别冲我发火
JULIUS: Hey, hey, hey.
嘿 嘿 嘿
Mama, can you help me make
妈妈 你能帮我写张
a Valentine's Day card?
情人节卡片吗
JULIUS: A homemade card.
自制卡片
That's my little girl, saving that money.
那才是我的乖女儿 懂得节约
Sure, baby.
当然了 亲爱的
Who's it for?
给谁呢
My boyfriend.
我的男朋友
Your what friend?
你的什么朋友？
Well, the girl can't help it if she's popular.
对一个受欢迎的女孩来说 这也是势不可挡的
Where'd you get a boyfriend?
你在哪交的男朋友？
At school.
学校
DREW: Hey, Ma, do you have
嘿 妈妈
a place where I can put all my Valentine's Day cards?
有没有地方给我放卡片？
How many you giving out, boy?
你要分发多少张？
Well, I'm not really giving them out.
呃 其实我也不是真的要发掉它们
Girls just keep on giving them to me.
只是姑娘们不停地送给我
