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Okay. Next person is going to sing Teenage Dream by Katy Perry
好 下一位将演唱凯蒂·佩里的《少女梦》
who is pretty now but used to have very horrible acne.
大美女凯蒂以前可是痤疮大丑女呢
This is the third Teenage Dream in 45 minutes.
短短的45分钟里 我都听了三遍《少女梦》了
Why don't I just close my nuts in the cashier's drawer?
我用收银机夹暴自己蛋蛋都没这么难受呢
Come on up now girl named "Stacey."
上场吧 史黛丝小姐
I got this.
这事儿交给我吧
Look I don't know you but I like you.
虽然我不认识你 但我对你有好感
And I respect both hair choices.
我也很尊重你发型的"二"样化
I hate karaoke.
我恨死卡拉OK了
I can't afford to have any more hate in my head.
我脑袋里 憎恨已经满档
My hate is at capacity.
恨意一触即发
Sit this one out I'll comp your cobbler.
你不献唱 我就送你个水果派
What did you do?
你这是干嘛
I saved Earl's nuts.
拯救厄尔快疼爆的蛋蛋
Pick up! Hot food. Pick up.
上菜 美味出炉 快上菜
Calm your bells down Oleg.
别对我猛按铃 奥列格
Not my stations.
不是我服务的区
Where's Caroline?
卡洛琳呢
Would it make you jealous if I said
如果我说她刚和我在后边
she was back here with me?
"激情"了一番 你会吃醋吗
Jealous? No.
吃醋倒不会
Pissed? Probably.
生气是肯定的
Because we're busy and it would take me all that time
店里超忙 我还要花时间解开
to get the duct tape off her mouth and hands.
你用来捆绑她以逞兽欲的胶布
What are you doin' in here snow white?
你在里面干嘛呢 白雪公主
If you're lookin' for one of your dwarves
如果想找你的小矮人
he's out there holding the mic.
其中一只在外面拿着麦克风呢
Look my bite is off.
瞧 我的咬合错位了
See I did the bite test.
这是我做的咬合检查
The number seven incisor is crossing over number nine.
第七号牙和第九号牙重叠了
Hold up. You know the names of your teeth?
慢着 你还知道自己牙齿的编号名吗
Don't you?
你不知道吗
I don't even know the name of my father.
我连我亲爹的名字都不知道
Ow I just bit my tongue.
哎哟 我刚咬到舌头了
Ah! Number 12 just joined the party.
第十二号也来瞎搅和了
I'd stop doing that right now.
快停止你这举动
You just made it into Oleg's spank bank.
你这一幕被存进奥列格的意淫银行了
Congratulations.
恭喜你哟
What am I gonna do without my bite guard?
牙齿保持器没了 我还怎么活啊
My teeth don't know where to go.
我的牙会到处乱跑的
Well maybe they should just backpack for a couple of years
就让它们去旅行个几年 找到人生方向
so they figure it out.
就不会乱跑了
Listen perfect teeth
听好了 美牙妹
this is a nightmare for me.
这是我人生中的恶梦
The technical term for this is "advanced bruxism."
用专业术语来说就是"中重度磨牙症"
And the technical term for you is "overly dramatic."
专业术语来说 你有"过度小题大做症"
Yesterday you freaked out 'cause we were out of toilet paper.
昨天家里没厕纸你就哭天喊地
Just hold it till you get to work like everybody else.
憋到上班的时候再上就好啦 大家都这样
