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Okay, yeah, my uncles are bald, but my Aunt Edna is one of the hairiest women you'll ever meet, so...Sweet lady. Always tickles when she hugs me.
好吧我的叔叔都是秃头，不过我阿姨埃德娜将是你见过的头发最茂盛的。挺和蔼可亲的。抱我的时候老是会痒痒。
What now? I have to make peepee.
又怎么了？我要尿尿。
Listen, I'm sorry about all of Sheldon's interruptions. He can be a bit of an eccentric.
听着，谢尔顿老是来打扰，我为此抱歉，他的举止是有点古怪。
If by "eccentric" you mean passiveaggressive East Texas blowhole, I agree.
要是你说的"举止古怪"是指他表面看起来支持我们实际却老在背地里捣乱我很同意。
I think tonight was a very good start.
我觉得今晚是个很不错的开端。
Me, too. Are you sure you're okay postponing intercourse until our relationship is past the initial viability test?
我也是。在我们的关系通过"生存能力大考验"之前你确定不和我发生关系？
No problem. I'm very skilled at postponing intercourse. I guess I'll call you and we'll arrange another evening.
没问题，我对延迟交配很在行。我会再打给你的，哪天晚上再过来。
Yes, I believe protocol dictates that you wait a minimum of 18 hours before you call so I'm not repulsed by your cloying eagerness.
没错，根据约定你至少得在18个小时之后才打给我，不然我会对你如此猴急反感的。
Sure. Again, it's your decision. You're the man.
当然。再说一遍，这是你决定的，你是男人。
It wasn't my cat. It was an experiment designed by this guy named Schroedinger.
那不是我的猫，是一个叫薛定谔的家伙设计的实验。
From the Charlie Brown cartoons?
查理布朗动画里的人物？
No, he was some kind of scientist. Let me start again. Oh, hey, Leonard.
不他是个啥科学家的，我们从头来过。 嘿兰纳德。
Hello. Leslie. hi. Okay, well, good night. Okay, well, good night. Call me. Right.
好啊。莱斯莉。你好。好吧晚安啦。好吧晚安啦。打给我哦。好。
Okay, good night. Uh, what? Had a great time. Ciao.
晚安 什么？今晚很高兴再见。
I'm sorry, I am not going back to the renaissance fair.
对不起我可不想再去什么文艺复兴节了。
Come on, Sheldon. There's so few places I can wear my jester costume.
行了谢尔顿，我还能穿小丑服去啥别的地方。
I don't care. There are far too many historical anomalies for my comfort.
我不管。这么多奇怪的人和物打着历史的名号。
Okay, how about this? You can go dressed as a Star Trek science officer exploring a planet similar to Earth in the 1500s.
你看这样如何？你可以打扮成星际迷航里的科学家，在十五世纪探索一个和地球类似的行星。
You mean, like Spock? Sure. Fascinating.
你是说像尖耳朵史波克那样？没错。太棒了。
Hey, fellow scientists...Sheldon.
嘿科学家同事们。谢尔顿。
Why don't we all move over there so Leslie can join us? Yeah, let's do it.
我们不如坐那儿吧，这样莱斯莉就能一起了。好，我们过去吧。
If you're having trouble deciding where to sit, may I suggest one potato, two potato? Or as I call it, the Leslie Winkle experimental methodology.
如果你不知道该坐哪儿，我建议你念"一个土豆两个土豆"，或者按我的叫法，莱斯莉温科的实验方法论。
Don't make this hard for me. It's not hard. It's simple.
别让我左右为难。这又不难，简单得很。
You can either sit with me, your friend, colleague and roommate or you can sit with an overrated scientist you might have sex with.
你可以和我，你的朋友同事兼室友坐一起，或者你可以要睡的，被高估的科学家坐一起。
You're right, it is simple.
你说对了，这很简单。
Hey, Sheldon. Penny. Third floor tonight mixing it up?
嘿谢尔顿。佩妮。今晚坐三楼，拌嘴升级了？
I still don't understand why you don't just go to dinner or something.
我还是不明白你为啥不去吃个饭之类的。
All right, let's say I go to dinner alone, and during the meal, I have to use the restroom.
好吧，就说我一个人去吃饭吧，在用餐期间我肯定得去洗手间。
How do I know someone is not touching my food?
我怎么知道别人没碰过我的食物？
Good night, Sheldon.
晚安谢尔顿。
Penny, hold on. Are you sure things can't work out with you and Leonard?
佩妮等等，你肯定你和兰纳德没可能了？
Excuse me? I'm just wondering if you really gave it the old college try.
什么？我只是想知道你会不会努力试试。
Or in your case, the old community college try. Okay, where is this coming from?
放在你身上就是去社区学院试试。干嘛要提起这个？
Leonard is upstairs right now with my archenemy. Your archenemy?
兰纳德和我的宿敌在楼上。你的宿敌？
Yes, the Dr. Doom to my Mr. Fantastic. Dr. Octopus to my SpiderMan, the Dr. Sivana to my Captain Marvel. I get it, I get it, I get it.
没错，就像毁灭博士对我的神奇先生，章鱼博士对我的蜘蛛侠，西瓦纳博士对我的神奇队长。明白了明白了。
Do you know, it's amazing how many super villains have advanced degrees.
真是奇妙，这些超级大坏蛋都有很高的学历。
Graduate school should probably do a better job of screening those people out.
研究生院该好好做做工作把他们筛选出去嘛。
Sheldon, come back. You're losing me.
谢尔顿快说正题，你把我弄晕了。
It's Leslie Winkle, Penny. She belittles my research.
佩妮我说的是莱斯莉温可，她鄙视我的研究。
Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. She called me "dumb ass." I know. I heard.
噢小可爱，我很抱歉。她叫我"傻蛋"。我知道，我听见了。
Given this situation, I have no choice but to withdraw my previous objections to your illconsidered relationship with Leonard.
在这种情况下，我不得不收回之前对你和兰纳德欠考虑关系的反对。
Oh, gee, well, thank you for that. But I think for now, Leonard and I are just gonna stay friends.
噢，谢谢你这么做，不过就现在而言兰纳德和我还是做朋友比较好。
No, that response is unacceptable to me.
不行，这个回答我无法接受。
Sheldon, you are a smart guy. You must know... I'm "smart"? I'd have to lose 60 IQ points to be classified as "smart."
谢尔顿你是个聪明人，你得知道...我是聪明人？要被归为聪明人我得去掉60点智商才行。
Are you gonna let me talk? I'm sorry.
你还让不让我说了？ 对不起。
You must know that if Leonard and Leslie want to be together, nothing you can do is gonna stop it.
你得知道要是兰纳德和莱斯莉要在一起的话你做什么都是阻止不了的。
You continue to underestimate my capabilities, madam.
小姐，你再次低估了我的能力。
Okay, let me put it this way. If you're really Leonard's friend, you will support him no matter who he wants to be with.
好这么说吧，如果你真是兰纳德的哥们，无论他和谁在一起你都会支持他的。
Wait a minute. Why am I doing all the giving here?
等一下，为什么都是我让步？
If Leonard's really my friend, why doesn't he have to support me an my hatred of Leslie Winkle?
如果兰纳德真的是我的哥们他怎么就不支持一下我对莱斯莉温可的厌恶之情？
Because love trumps hate. Oh, now you're just making stuff up. Okay, good night, Sheldon.
因为爱胜过厌恶。噢你可真会胡说。好吧，晚安了谢尔顿。
Oh, Mario, if only I could control everyone the way I control you. Hop, you little plumber, hop, hop, hop.
马里奥，要是我能像控制你一样控制他人该多好。跳啊，你个小水管工，跳跳跳。
When the two of you reach a natural stopping point, I'd like to have a word.
等你们自然地结束以后我有话要说。
The word is "peepee." Just do it.
如果你要说"尿尿"去就是了。
Leonard, you're my friend, and friends support their friends apparently.
兰纳德你是我朋友，朋友互相支持那是显然的。
So I'm withdrawing my objection to your desire to have a relationship with Leslie.
所以我收回对你和莱斯莉交往的反对。
Thank you. I will graciously overlook the fact that she is an arrogant, subpar scientist who actually believes loop quantum gravity better unites quantum mechanics with generally relativity than does string theory.
谢谢。我会和蔼地远眺这位傲慢而不合格的，相信环量子引力更好地联系起量子力学和广义相对论而不是弦理论的科学家。
You kids have fun.
你们自娱自乐吧。
Hang on a second. Loop quantum gravity clearly offers more testable predictions than string theory.
等等，环量子引力明显比弦理论提供了更多可证的预测。
I'm listening. Amuse me.
我在听呢，逗我笑吧。
Okay, well, for one thing, we expect quantized spacetime to manifest itself as minute differences in the speed of light for different colors.
好，一方面来说我们期待量子化的时空能够证明在光速下不同颜色的细小差异。
Balder dash. Matter clearly consists of tiny strings.
胡言乱语，物质显然是由细小的弦组成的。
Are you gonna let him talk to me like that?
他这么同我说话你就坐视不理？
Okay, well, there is a lot of merit to both theories.
好吧，两种理论各有各的优势。
No, there isn't. Only loop quantum gravity calculates the entropy of black holes.
不是这样的，只有环量子引力能算出黑洞的熵值。
Sheldon, don't make that noise. It's disrespectful.
谢尔顿别发出那种声音，太不尊重人了。
I should hope so. It was a snort of derision.
我正是这么想的。那是嘲笑的鼻音。
You agree with me, right? Loop quantum gravity is the future of physics.
你同意我的对吧？环量子引力是物理学的未来。
Sorry, Leslie, I guess I prefer my space stringy, not loopy.
抱歉莱斯莉我比较同意弦理论而不是环理论。
I'm glad I found out the truth about you before this went any further.
我很高兴能在我们的关系有进展前看到了真相。
Truth? What truth? We're talking about untested hypotheses. It's no big deal.
真相？什么真相？我们在讨论未经证实的假说，有什么大不了的。
It isn't? Really? Tell me, Leonard, how will we raise the children?
真的没什么大不了的？兰纳德告诉我，我们怎么教育我们的孩子。
I guess we wait until they're old enough and let them choose their own theory.
我猜我们会等他们长大了自己选吧。
We can't let them choose, Leonard. They're children! Wait. Where are you going?
怎么能让他们自己选，他们是孩子！等等你上哪儿去？
I'm sorry. I could have accepted our kids being genetically unable to eat ice cream or ever get a good view of a parade.
对不起，就遗传角度而言，我们的孩子不能吃冷饮也没法在游行时看得更远，这些我还都能接受。
But this? This is a deal breaker.
但是这个？这是原则问题。
Look on the bright side. What's the bright side? Only nine more months to Comiccon. Oh, yeah.
要看到好的一面。哪有好的一面？离动漫展只有九个月了。噢是啊。
Captain, I'm getting an unusual reading.
队长，发现异常情况。
Yeah, that's great. You guys want a corn dog?
那很好啊。你们要来根玉米肠么？
Yeah. That's a temporal anomaly. Corn dog's didn't come into existence till the first half of the 20th century.
好啊，时间异常，玉米肠是二十世纪中叶才出现的。
