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All right, Raj has played his phantom warlord card,
好的，拉杰出了幽灵军团卡
And I am going to back him up with my strangling vines.
我就出绞杀蔓藤帮他
Choke on that, sucka.
绞死你，笨蛋
Okay, well, then I'll just cut your vines with my ruby sword.
那我就用红宝石剑砍断你的蔓藤
That's right, I did it. I cut 'em.
没错，我干的，我砍了
I have a question.
我想问个问题
Warlord beats troll, troll beats elf,
军团能吃巨人，巨人能吃精灵
Elf beats water sprite, And basically everything beats enchanted bunny.
精灵能吃水妖，基本上什么都能吃魔法小兔
Unless you have the carrot powder.
除非你有胡萝卜粉
Okay, I've got another question.
我还想问一个问题
When does this get fun?
这有什么好玩的
Are we going to talk? Or are we going to play "mystic warriors of ka-ah"?
我们是要讨论？还是继续玩"卡亚神秘勇士"
Just play a potion card.
出毒药卡
Which one?
哪张
It doesn't matter. You can't possibly win.
哪张都一样你不可能赢了
Sheldon, don't ruin the game.
谢尔顿，别破坏游戏
How could he ruin the game?
他怎么可能破坏游戏
Given the cards that have already been played,
根据已出的卡推算
Penny can only be holding necromancer potions,
佩妮手上只能有巫师毒药
Which are only effective against wraiths and day-walkers, And there are no more of either left to be drawn.
毒药只对幽灵和日行者有效但两个都已经出完了
The cards remaining in the undrawn stack are:
剩下未出的卡是
Four fire weapons, a troll, two ogres and the jewel of osiris.
四张火焰，一张巨人，两张食人怪和冥神宝石
See? Ruined.
瞧，被破坏了吧
Sheldon, that is incredible.
谢尔顿，太厉害了
From your vantage point, it certainly must seem so.
对你来说，当然是厉害
Sheldon has kind of a photographic memory.
谢尔顿有图像式记忆的能力
"photographic" is a misnomer.
"图像式"用词不当
I have an eidetic memory, as I've told you many times.
应该是高清图像式记忆，我说过好几遍了
Most recently last year during lunch on the afternoon of may seventh.
最近一次是去年5月7日中午午餐期间
You had turkey and complained it was dry.
你吃了火鸡，还抱怨太干了
Well, I guess game'over.
看来游戏结束了
Really? Oh, great.
真的，太好了
I mean, aw.
我是说"哦"
- Okay, I gotta go. - Why?
-我得走了，-为什么
Because the last me I didn't go, I ended up playing "mystic warlords of ka."
就因为上次没走我才会玩"卡神秘勇士"
Not "ka. Ka-ah."
不是"卡"，是"卡亚"
Buh-eye.
拜丫儿
See ya.
回见
Still can't believe she's going out with me.
还是不敢相信她和我在一起了
Nobody can.
没人相信
That reminds me I have a bone to pick with you.
这倒提醒我有笔旧账还没跟你算清
What?
什么
You and I made a pact
你我有个约定
That if either of us ever got a hot girlfriend,
我们中谁先追到个漂亮女友
That person would have his girlfriend hook the other guy up with one of her girlfriends.
谁就得让他的女友给对方介绍一个女友
I don't remember that.
我不记得有这回事
June 30th, 2004.
2004年，6月30日
Opening day of Spider-Man 2 at the Amc Pasadena.
《蜘蛛侠 2》在帕萨迪纳AMC影院上映
They only had red icees, no blue.
那里只有红冰极饮料，没有蓝的
Oh, yeah.
想起来了
So you've been with Penny for like a month and a half now.
你和佩妮在一起都有一个半月了
Where's my shorty, morty?
我的妞呢
Howard, you can't hold me to that.
霍华德，你不能要求我这么做
Why not?
为什么不行
Because when I made that agreement, I didn't think I'd ever have a hot girlfriend.
因为当时约定时我没想过能交到一个漂亮女友
And I was positive you ever would.
我当时以为你能交到呢
Hey, how come I wasn't part of this deal?
我怎么不知道这件事
You had left the refreshment stand in order to indulge in your customary preemptive pre-show urination.
你当时不在小食店，你去解决习惯性提前出现的尿急了
Oh, so that's how it works? I have a teeny bladder and I don't get a hot girlfriend?
就因为这个，就因为我的膀胱小，我就不能有漂亮女友了
Yeah, Raj. That's how it works.
对，拉杰，就因为这个
Damn.
靠
Can I have a napkin?
能给我张纸巾吗
I'm sorry, no.
抱歉，不行
But you have whole bunch of 'em.
你有好几张呢
Yes, I've moved to a four-napkin system.
对，我现在用的是四张纸巾体系
Lap, hands, face and personal emergency.
分别对应腿，手，脸和个人紧急情况
If you like, starting tomorrow, I'll add a guest napkin,
你需要的话，明天开始我会加一张客用纸巾
But I'm afraid there's nothing I can do for you today.
但我今天实在无能为力
Good luck. That's the face napkin.
好运，那是擦脸纸巾
So, have you talked to Penny yet?
你跟佩妮说了吗
No, I haven't.
还没有
Why not?
为什么
Because I've been busy,
因为我很忙
Because I haven't figured out a way to bring it up,
因为我不知道怎么跟她提
And mostly-- and I can't stress how key this is--
最主要的是，"特别强调这点"
Because I don't want to.
因为我不想提
Leonard, pact is a pact. You have to get Penny to fix me up.
莱纳德，约定就是约定你必须让佩妮给我找个伴
It's not that simple.
事情没那么简单
What am I supposed to say? "Penny, do you have any friend? You'd like to never hear from again?"
你要我怎么说佩妮，你有没有？不想再联系的朋友
Come on, I'm smart, I have good job and I have only three percent body fat.
拜托，我那么聪明又有份好工作，而且我的体脂肪率只有3%
It's true.
真的
I've seen him at the beach.
我在沙滩上看过
He's like a human chicken wing.
他就像个人形鸡翅
Leonard, come on.
莱纳德，拜托
Fine. I'll ask if she has a friend for you.
好吧，我会问她有没有适合你的朋友
Hot friend.
要漂亮的哦
- Right. - And tall.
-行 -还要高挑的
I want our kids to be able to Ride Space Mountain before they're 20.
我希望我们的孩子能在20岁前玩飞越太空山(迪士尼乐园)
I'll see what I can do.
我尽力而为
Hey, Sheldon, guess what I heard today?
谢尔顿，猜我今天听到什么
I'd imagine you heard many number of things today.
我能想象你今天听了很多东西
When you arrived at work you undoubtedly heard, "hello, Raj." "How are you, Raj?"
你来上班肯定会听到，"你好，拉杰"？过得如何，拉杰
Given that you're wearing a new sweater-vest,
考虑到你今天穿了件新的羊毛背心，会听到"新背心啊"
And possibly, though far less likely, "nice sweater-vest."
也有可能，虽然可能性很小，听到"羊毛背心很漂亮"
Why don't I just tell you what I heard today.
为什么不干脆让我告诉你今天听到了什么
That would probably save us some time.
因为这可能节约我们的时间
Saturday night at the comic book store, they're having a "Mystic Warlords of Ka-Ah" tournament.
星期六晚上在漫画书店那里将举办一个"卡亚神秘勇士"锦标赛
First prize is $500.
第一名有500美金
If we team up, we'd be unstoppable.
如果我们组队，肯定无敌了
I'm sorry, Raj, but I have no interest in playing a game in which I find no challenge.
对不起，拉杰，对于没有挑战性的游戏我完全不感兴趣
What about the money?
那钱呢
I have money.
我有钱啊
This is other money.
这钱不一样
How does it differ from the money I have?
那这跟我自己拥有的钱有什么区别
Half of it will be mine.
我要拿一半啊
Do you need it to buy a less disturbing sweater-vest?
你需要钱买一件不那么惹人嫌的羊毛背心吗
Leonard, help.
莱纳德，救救我吧
Are you kidding?I couldn't even talk him into giving one of his freakin' napkins.
开什么玩笑？我甚至不能说服他给我一张狗日的餐巾纸
Wow, you really are a genius.
天呐，你真是个天才
Not really.
不算吧
I googled how to do that.
我其实是在网上搜到的这些花式
So, listen...Have you ever made a pact with someone?
问一下，你有跟谁有过约定吗
You mean like a pinky swear?
你是说那种拉勾勾誓言吗
Okay, fine, like a pinky swear.
好吧，就算是那种拉勾勾誓言
Well, in the first grade, my friend Rosie and I made a pact to marry Bert and Ernie.
一年级时候，我和我朋友萝茜约定要嫁给毕特和恩尼
You know, from Sesame street?
你知道的，芝麻街里面(美国木偶剧)
I'm familiar with Bert and Ernie.
我跟毕特和恩尼还蛮熟的
Then we find out we both wanted Ernie.
然后我们发现都想要嫁给恩尼
We didn't speak again until middle school.
我们直到中学都没再说过话
Over puppets?
就因为那个木偶
The heart wants what the heart wants, Leonard.
各人心头所好啊，莱纳德
Okay.
好吧
Speaking of what the heart want-
说到心头所好
Um, a long time ago, I made a pact with Wolowitz that kind of involves you.
很久以前，我跟沃罗威茨有个约定，其中牵涉到你
Okay, I don't know where you're going with this,
我不知道接下来你要说什么
But tread carefully because it may be the last conversation we ever have.
但你最好小心点，因为我们可能因此玩完
No, no, nothing like that.
不，不，不是那样的
The deal was that if either of us ever got a girlfriend,
交易说的是如果我们当中任意一个有女朋友了
We'd have her fix the other one up with one of her friends.
我们就要她介绍她的朋友 给约定的另一方
And you thought it's a good time to bring this up right after sex?
你觉得这种事适合在激情过后马上说吗
Well, I sure as hell wasn't going to bring it up before sex.
我只是很确定在激情之前不会说
And during, I was trying to remember what I read on google,so...
而在激情进行时，我在尽力回想在谷歌上看到的花式
I'm not hooking Wolowitz up with one of my friends.
我绝不会介绍我的朋友给沃罗威茨，
It doesn't have to be a good friend.
不一定是要好朋友啊
And you know that deep down inside, Howard's a really nice guy.
而且你也知道他内里其实是个很好的人
The problem isn't what's on the inside.
这问题不在于他的内里
It's the creepy candy coating.
在于他令人毛骨悚然的淫荡外表
Will you at least think about it?
你能好歹考虑一下吗
Just as a favor to me?
就当是帮我个忙
Oh, great thing about ernie, was he never asked me for anything.
我最喜欢恩尼的一点 就是他从不求我什么
He just gave.
他只给予
Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it.
有了，有了，有了，有了，有了，有了
Betty and Veronica?
《贝蒂与维罗妮卡》
Hey, Sheldon, the new Greelantern figurine's coming in tomorrow. Want me to set one aside for you?
谢尔顿，新的《绿灯侠》手办明天就到了，要我给你留一份吗
Thank you. You just robbed me of the opportunity to stumble upon the figurine
谢谢。你刚刚夺走了我从无意中找到手办
And make the oh-so-satisfying journey from discovery to desire to possession.
那种从发现到渴望到占有的持续快感的机会给抢走了
All right, I won't set one aside for you.
好吧，那我不给你留了
But I must have it.
但我必须要拥有它
- Okay, I'll set one aside for you. - Thank you.
-行，那我给你留着，-谢谢
You know, I can buy all these things online. I come here for the personal service.
你知道我本可以在网上买这些的，我来这是为了个性化服务的
Hey, Stuart, is the Wil Wheaton signed up for the Mystic Warlords tournament the Wil Wheaton from Star Trek?
斯图尔特，威尔·惠顿报名参加了这个神秘勇士锦标赛吗？就是《星际迷航》里的那个威尔·惠顿吗
Yeah, he lives around here. Big gamer.
他住在这附近，狂热玩家
Excuse me.
打扰一下
Are you saying that wil wheaton aka Ensign Wesley Crusher on Star Trek: The next generation
你是在说威尔·惠顿，也就是出演了《星际迷航: 下一代》中卫斯理·柯洛夏少尉的那位
Is going to be participating in your tournament?
将会参与你的锦标赛吗
Oh, I'm sorry, did I rob you of the opportunity to stumble onto that for yourself?
很抱歉，我又剥夺了你发现这个的机会吗
You don't understand.
你不明白的
Growing up, I idolizedle Wil Wheaton. Wesley Crusher had an eidetic memory just like me.
我从小到大一直以威尔·惠顿为偶像的卫斯理·柯洛夏有和我一样的高清图像式记忆
Ooh, what a coincidence. Maybe you can discuss with him while you're playing in the tournament.
天呐，多么神奇的巧合啊，你也许可以跟他在锦标赛中讨论一下
Sign here. I was such a fan That in 1995, I traveled ten hours by bus
-在这签字，-我是他的粉丝回想1995年，我坐了10个小时的汽车
To a sci-fi convention in Jackson, Mississippi,
到密西西比州的杰克逊市参加科幻大会
Wearing my Starfleet Academy cadet uniform
穿着我的星舰学院实习生制服
In order to meet Wil Wheaton
就是为了见威尔·惠顿
And get him to autograph my mint in-package Wesley Crusher action figure
还有让他在我珍藏的未拆封的卫斯理·柯洛夏手办上签名
Ooh, it'll be like a reunion then.
啊，那这不就是重逢了嘛
Sign here.
在这签字
My arduous journey, however, was for naught.
然而我艰苦的旅行却一无所获
Although advertised to appear, he did not show up.
尽管广告说他会出现，却最终没来
It was at that moment, I vowed eternal hatred for Wil Wheaton.
就在那一刻，我发誓要永远憎恨威尔·惠顿
Okay, great, you can tell him you hate him.
太棒了，你可以告诉他你恨他
Sign here.
在这签字
It might also interest you to know that Wil Wheaton
也许你们会想知道威尔·惠顿
Currently ranks sixth on my all-time enemies list--
在我的永远的敌人名单里暂排第六
Right between director Joel Schumacher, who nearly destroyed the batman movie franchise,
排名就在差点毁掉蝙蝠侠系列电影的导演乔·舒马赫
And Billy Sparks, who lived down the street from me and put dog poop on the handles of my bicycle.
和比利·斯派克之间他住在我家后面一条路上曾经把狗屎放在我自行车的把手上
Okay, I get it. He's a bad guy. Sign here.
好的，我明白了，他是坏人。在这签名
In the words of Khan Noonien Singh. In the immortal Wrath of Khan, "he tasks me."
引用不朽的《可汗的愤怒》中，可汗努尼安辛格的一句话，"他让我受难"
He tasks me and I shall have him."
他让我受难，我要和他较量到底
No doubt, sign here. From hell's heart, I stab at thee."
毫无疑问，签名吧。我渡尽劫波，刺出复仇之剑(《白鲸记》)
All right, raj, looks like you're teamed up
好了，拉杰，看来你的队友名叫
With "die, Wil Wheaton, die."
"威尔·惠顿，去死去死"
So, tell me more about the future mother of my children.
好，多说说我未来孩子他妈嘛
She's adorable, howard. I think you'll like her.
她很讨人喜欢，霍华德，你一定喜欢她
Great.
赞
So what did you tell her about me? Did you mention the body fat?
你是怎么和他描述我的提了我的体脂含量了吗
No, I thought that would be a nice surprise for her.
没有，我想给她个惊喜
Good, good.
好，很好
I just told her you're an aerospace engineer,
我就说你是航天工程师
You speak five languages--Six if you count klingon.
通五种语言是六种，还有克林贡语
Girls don't count klingon, Howard.
女孩儿可不鸟克林贡语，霍华德
Right?
对不?
Right.
没错
Oh. And I told her you have an unhealthy attachment to your mother.
我还告诉她说你对你妈有不正常的依恋情结
What?
不会吧
I'm kidding.
说笑而已
Another delightful surprise for her.
又一个意外惊喜啊
