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We are about to make hat history. Or as I like to call it, "Hatstory."
我们要书写帽子的新历史了。我更愿意称之为"帽史"
Early man had hours and hours to scratch his weary head. But what about today's busy times? Thank you, squire.
先民们无所事事终日可以自挠头皮。而今快节奏社会哪来时间挠？谢谢你，小卢子。
Great thing about this? You can wear it anywhere. Hit it, buddy.
这项伟大的发明妙在何处？你可以随时随地都戴上。开秀吧，伙计。
Oh! It's like a thousand tiny angels are line dancing on my sca--
我靠！就像成千上万的小天使在我的头皮上开舞林大会......
I...it looks like we got a slight malfunction in a rear nogginizer. Oh! Shut her down! Shut her down, buddy!
我去，似乎头部按摩仪出了点小故障。不要啊！快关了！快关了啊，伙计！
It's not working! - My hair! It's got my hair! Okay! Fine. That--I'm fine.
停不了啊！-一剪没啊！发如血啊！好吧！算了。我没事。
Forgot about that feature. It's an exfoliating...scrub. Buddy, can you grab the safety shears?
去他妈的神奇功能吧。简直是剥头皮。儿子，给老爸把安全剪拿来。
You know what, Phil? Keep it up. And I admire you and Manny. I know what it's like to stare down skepticism from a loved one.
我告诉你，菲尔，坚持就是胜利。我欣赏你和曼尼。我明白被心爱的人质疑的滋味。
Cam, not now. -Why not now? It's Thanksgiving. Families gather. Issues come up.
小卡，现在不是时候。-有什么不行？感恩节良辰吉日啊。家人团聚。问题爆发。
Only if you bring them up.
问题也是你提出来才有的啊。
It's healthy to get things out in the open. Y'all know my punkin chunkin story, or do you need a refresher?
打开天窗说亮话对谁都好。你们都听过我的射南瓜轶事吧，要不要我再帮你们复习一下？
We've heard it. -Oh, several times.
我们听过。-好几遍呢。
I love it. With Cody and the friends? Yes. So you know how it ends. But the question is, who here thinks I made that up?
我喜欢那个故事。是和科迪还有别的朋友一起的那个吗？没错。所以你们知道故事结局吧。但问题是，觉得我瞎编的举手。
Oh. Well, doesn't that tell the whole story right there?
看吧，简直是泾渭分明，清清楚楚啊？
Here we have the skeptics, the dream-squashers...the Pritchetts.
这边是我们的怀疑派，打压别人梦想的人，普里契特一家。
And here we have the dreamers, the artists, the visionaries. Sweet Caroline!
而这边是梦想家，艺术家和有远见的人。苍天大地啊！
So we're supposed to believe that you make a-a pumpkin fly across a football field.
难道要让我们相信你让一个南瓜飞过了整个足球场。
Yeah. I can prove it to you right now. Let's go to the football field.
对。我现在就能证明给你们看。我们去足球场。
Yes! Let's do this. I'd love to end this.
行！去就去。我希望争议就此结束。
Yeah! Let's settle this! Dreamers versus Pritchetts! Bravo! Bravo! When I say "Punkin," You say "Chunkin"! -Punkin! Punkin! - No, no, no!
就是！我们去比试一场吧！梦想家对普里契特一家！太棒了！我说南瓜你说射！-南瓜！南瓜！-不，停下来！
Hold it! I did not just cook for eight hours so you people could run off to prove some asinine point that's only gonna make half of us feel bad!
站住！我做了8个小时的饭菜不是为了让你们跑出去证明些愚蠢的观点，输掉的那一方会很难过的。
Come on! Show a little respect.
拜托！尊重下我的劳动成果好吗。
Turkey smells great, sweetheart.
火鸡闻起来很香，亲爱的。
Is that turkey? Because something smells like chicken. -Okay, let's settle this. - Yeah. Vamos, vamos! Jay, I drive! -When I say "Punkin," You say "Chunkin"! Punkin! Chunkin!
那是火鸡吗？我怎么觉得闻起来像鸡味（胆小鬼）。-好吧，我们一决胜负吧。-太好了。大家来吧！杰，我开车！-我说南瓜你说射！南瓜！射！
