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Hey, Psych2Goers. Welcome back to another video. Thank you all so much for being here.
嘿，Psych2Goers，欢迎回来。非常感谢大家的观看。
With your help and support we're able to succeed in our mission to make mental health and psychology more accessible to everyone. So thank you. Now, let's begin.
在大家的帮助和支持下，我们能够成功完成我们的使命，让每个人都更容易获取心理健康和心理学知识，所以谢谢大家。咱们开始吧。
What do you think it takes to be irresistible?
你觉得什么能够让人无法抗拒？
Is it a kindness that shines, a giving heart and happily volunteering in your free time? Or is it buying fancy cars?
是闪闪发光的善良，一颗给予的心，还是在空闲的时候快乐地做一名志愿者？或者是买辆豪车？
Following the latest trends and dating the most popular person in school?
再或者是紧跟潮流，和学校里最受欢迎的人约会？
Whichever way most suits you, there are actually some very simple habits that can help make you irresistible to others.
不管说哪一个最适合你吧，其实有一些非常简单的习惯可以帮助你让别人无法抗拒你。
You'll appear more likable, friendly and people will want to be around you when you incorporate these 10 habits that'll make you irresistible.
当你养成这10个让别人无法抗拒你的习惯时，你会变得更可爱、更友好，别人也会想和你在一起。
Number one: Instill some quiet confidence.
第一：慢慢地树立自信。
What's the difference between confidence and cockiness?
自信和自大的区别是什么？
Acting cocky is more of a boastful show of mock confidence.
自大更多的是一种自吹自擂、假装自信的表现。
Confidence is when you're self-assured with who you are and are secure in your own decisions.
自信是你对自己有信心，对自己的决定有信心。
When you hold your head up with confidence, with clear eyes and a clear heart, you can go far in life.
当你充满自信地昂起头，眼神清澈，心灵清澈，你就能在生活中走得很远。
When you are confident and believe in who you are as a person, that's a very attractive trait.
当你非常自信并相信自己时，这就是一个非常吸引人的特质。
Number two: R-E-S-P-E-C-T Respect Goes a long way.
第二条：尊重，尊重才能走得更远。
There was a school of thought that those who want respect should give respect and that's not wrong.
有一种学派认为，只有给予别人尊重才能得到自己想要的尊重，这句话说得很对。
If you want proper respect and recognition from others you have to give some first, respect, courtesy and basic human decency can do a lot to make a good first impression on those around you.
如果你想从别人那里得到适当的尊重和认可，你首先必须给予别人一些尊重，礼貌和基本的礼仪可以给你周围的人留下好的第一印象。
Number three: Implement the golden rule.
第三：实施黄金法则。
The golden rule states that you should do unto others like you would have them do unto you.
金科玉律(孔子)说：己所不欲，勿施于人。
This means to treat others how you would ideally want to be treated.
就是说你希望别人怎么对待你，你就得怎么对待别人。
If you want to be treated with kindness, dignity and respect, then you should treat others that way as well.
如果你想要被善待，想要尊重，那么你也应该善待别人，给予别人尊重。
Number four: Don't engage in gossip.
第四：不要参与八卦。
Do you think people who gossip and spread rumors can get far in life?
你觉得那些喜欢八卦和散布谣言的人能在生活中走得更远吗？
Generally, people who participate in the rumor mill aren't that popular because they can't be trusted.
通常情况下，参与谣言的人不怎么受欢迎，因为他们不可信。
Spreading around someone's private information or casting supposedly negative judgment on others is painful for those involved.
散布某人的私人信息或对他人做出所谓的负面评价对当事人来说是痛苦的。
Acting this way also reflects poorly on the gossiper because of this. Gossiping is not recommended.
这样做也会给八卦者留下不好的印象，所以不要说闲话。
If you wanna be as irresistible as possible to others, honesty and integrity are much more desirable traits that will draw good people to you.
如果你想尽可能地让别人无法抗拒，诚实和正直是吸引好人的更可取的品质。
Number five: You can't please everyone.
第五：你不可能让所有人都满意。
Do you try to please everyone at your own expense?
你有没有试图牺牲自己的代价来取悦所有人？
Do you tier yourself out trying to make everyone around you happy?
你有没有努力让周围的所有人都开心？
When you use up all of your energy on other people that leaves you very little energy for yourself or other loved ones who may really need it.
当你把所有的精力都用在别人身上时，留给自己或其他真正需要的人的精力就会很少了。
Being a people pleaser also, isn't seen as a very attractive trait because it gives the impression that you are insecure and lacking in self-esteem.
“讨人喜欢”也不被认为是很有吸引力的特质，因为这会给人留下缺乏安全感和自尊的印象。
Nobody can please everybody. After all we are pizza.
没有谁能让所有人都满意，毕竟我们都只是馅儿饼。
Number six: Be yourself.
第六：做你自己。
How are you, your most authentic self?
你是一个怎样的人？最真实的你是怎样的？
How are you living out your personal truth?
你是如何实践你的个人真理的？
One of the best traits to have is to simply be who you are and to own that.
最好的品质之一就是做你自己并掌握这一特质。
When you are genuine and true to yourself you'll attract others who are genuine too.
当你对自己真诚时，你也就能吸引那些真诚之人到你身边。
Like-minded individuals will be attracted to you because they recognize that you're confident in who you are.
志同道合的人会被你吸引，因为他们知道你对自己很自信。
Number seven: Radiate positive energy.
第七，散发正能量。
Don't you feel warmed by someone when they give you a genuine smile as they pass by?
当有人经过你身边给你一个真诚的微笑时，你会不会觉得很温暖？
It stops you for a second and you feel a little lighter.
这个微笑会让你驻足，会让你感觉更轻松。
All it took for you was a genuine kind, happy smile. You can do that for others too.
你所需要的只是一个真诚、善良、开心的微笑。同时你也可以把这个微笑赠与他人。
When you radiate positive energy it makes other people feel better as well.
当你浑身都散发着正能量时，你身边的人也会感觉更好。
And that can attract a lot of people to you.
这可以吸引很多人。
Eight: Real kindness is what matters.
第八，真正的善良才是最重要的。
Real genuine kindness is very important to foster in your own life but can also make you irresistible to others.
在你的生活中培养真正的善良是非常重要的，但也会让别人无法抗拒你。
Do you like to volunteer? Do you help out at a soup kitchen or help raise funds for charities?
你喜欢做志愿者吗？你有在施舍处帮过忙或者为慈善机构筹集过资金吗？
When you show off your kind, giving heart people will respond to that and readily accept that about you, they'll like to be around you because you show them genuine kindness and acceptance.
当你表现出你的善良和善心时，人们会对此做出回应并欣然接受你，他们会喜欢和你在一起，因为你表现出了真诚的善良和接受。
Number nine: Have a good listening ear.
第九，做一个好的倾听者。
Have you heard of the term active listening?
你听说过“积极倾听”这个词吗？
Active listening is when you properly respond and reciprocate to what someone's saying to you.
“积极倾听”就是恰当地回应别人对你说的话。
You aren't distracted looking at your phone or interrupting whoever's speaking when you engage in active listening.
当你在积极倾听时，你不会分心看手机或打断别人说话。
Having a good listening ear is an irresistible trait to have because people will wanna talk with you more and be more inclined to open up to you since you're such a good listener.
做一个好的倾听者是一种不可抗拒的品质，因为别人会想和你进行更多的交谈，会更倾向于和你敞开心扉，因为你是一个很好的倾听者。
And number 10: Offer your support.
第十，为他人提供你的支持。
Everyone has things they need to get off their chest and is in need of someone to talk to at times.
每个人都有想倾诉的心事，有时需要有人倾诉。
If someone comes to you and chooses to confide in you, don't take that for granted.
如果有人来到你身边并选择向你倾诉，不要认为那是理所当然的。
Even if you don't have much to offer in the way of advice or problem solving, you'll instill a trusted bond with this person when they know that they can come to you with their problems.
即便你没有什么建议或解决问题的办法，当他人知道他们可以向你倾诉他们的问题时，你就会逐渐与他建立起信任的关系。
Just listening to them and being there for them and letting them know that they are heard, respected and supported can go a long way with their impression of you when you tell them that you're there for them.
只要倾听他们的心声，陪在他们身边，让他们知道你会倾听他们的心声，尊重他们，支持他们，这会大大提升他们对你的印象。
So what habits will you use to make yourself irresistible to others? Let us know in the comments below.
那么，你会养成哪些习惯来让别人对自己无法抗拒呢？请在下方的评论区告诉我们。
