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机械版奶酪青酱面包

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You suck at cooking, yeah you totally suck.

你的厨艺弱爆了,完全弱爆了。

Hello, my name is Pimblokto, and today we are going to be cooking grilled cheese with pesto on bread.

嗨,我叫平不洛克多,今天我们做烤三明治和青酱面包。

Delicious bread.

美味的面包。

We're going to use coconut oil on the bread instead of butter.

面包上刷椰子油而不是黄油,

because it's delicious and awesome and it tastes good.

因为椰子油好吃,美味,而且好吃。

Let's get this jar opened.

先把瓶子打开。

Use your magnetispherescope to open the jar.

施展磁性魔力开瓶。

Good job everybody.

大家棒棒。

Simply use the knife to spread some coconut oil.

直接用刀涂上椰子油。

Okay. Time to go old-school, bitches.

服气。还是用经典老办法,混蛋。

If anyone judges you, tell them to go fuck themselves.

要是有人哔哔赖赖,直接让他们滚开。

We are aiming for homogeny here.

我们追求同一。

Homogeny is a beautiful thing.

同一是美的。

If only I had the capacity to understand what beauty is.

我要是理解什么是美就好了。

Now that's looking great. Great job, everybody.

这样看起来挺不错,大家棒棒。

Now, let's shred some cheese.

现在刮一些奶酪。

Simply grab your grater in one hand.

一只手拿刮板。

Grab the cheese.

再把奶酪拿起来。

Aw fuck, that's the wrong side.

草,拿错面了。

There we go.

好了。

Cocksucker.

特么的。

Good job, everybody.

大家棒棒。

Now let's get some pesto onto the bread.

现在涂一些青酱到面包上。

Use your magnetispherescope again.

再次施展磁性魔力。

Alright, we're ready to cook.

好了,可以开火了。

Aw fuck, I forgot the pesto.

草,我忘了青酱。

Spread that shit around real good.

均匀地涂上去。

Now let's get this bread into the pan.

现在把面包放进平底锅。

That crispy sound means that there is a kinetic energy increase to the molecules of the bread,

这个滋滋的声音表示面包分子的动能在增加,

and a chemical reaction starts to take place that results in the bread tasting delicious.

正在发生一种化学反应,导致面包美味度提升。

Now get some grated cheese on there.

现在把刮好的奶酪放上去。

And now you're laughing.

现在你可以开始笑了。

Not literally.

不用真的笑。

Get that other piece of bread on there.

把另一片面包放上去。

And if you want to be a really fancy motherfucker, put some more cheese on top.

要是想花哨一点,可以再放一些奶酪上去。

which will cook in, creating a layer of crispy, cheesy deliciousness that will make your circuits explode.

这些奶酪会融化,形成一层很脆、很有奶酪味外壳,好吃到让你的线路板爆炸。

Ha ha ha. Just kidding. You do not have circuits. You're a human.

哈哈哈,开玩笑,你没有线路板,你是人类。

Sometimes you want to go on a lower temperature.

有时候可以把温度调低一些。

Actually, that temperature is just fine.

其实这个温度也可以。

Take a little peek.

瞄一眼。

Jesus Christ, that looks good.

我的上帝啊,看起来很棒。

I wish I had a mouth.

我要是有嘴就好了。

I think it's time to flip this bitch over.

可以把它翻过来了。

Just take your spatula,

拿起铲子,

and using a first-class lever dynamic with the fulcrum in the middle.

以中间为支点,利用一级杠杆动力学,

Oh shit. We're all gonna die.

草,完蛋了。

Ouch, my hands.

啊,我的手。

Ouch, that hurts.

啊,好疼。

Let's get this bastard out. C'mon.

把面包搞出来。出来啊。

Now, you just want to turn off.

现在关火。

Actually, just leave the stove on until the next time you cook.

其实也可以让炉子烧着,下次直接用。

Now grab your knife and cut it.

现在拿起刀开始切面包。

Good job, everybody.

大家棒棒。

Grilled cheese with coconut oil and pesto.

烤奶酪加椰子油和青酱。

Man, I really wish I could taste this.

兄弟们,我真希望我能尝尝这个面包。

This is actually very frustrating for me.

我真的很遗憾。

YOU SUCK AT COOKING 11100100111111111111

你的厨艺弱爆了110010011111111111

You suck at cooking. Oh my god, you suck.

你的厨艺弱爆了,天啊,弱爆了。

You suck, suck at cooking. Oh my god, you suck.

你的厨艺弱爆了,天啊,弱爆了。

You suck, you suck.

弱爆了,弱爆了,

Oh my god, you suck.

天啊,弱爆了。

重点单词   查看全部解释    
explode [iks'pləud]

想一想再看

vt. 爆炸,驳倒
vi. 爆炸,爆发(感情)

 
dynamic [dai'næmik]

想一想再看

adj. 动态的,动力的,有活力的
n. 动力

 
flip [flip]

想一想再看

vt. 掷,弹,轻击
vi. 翻转

联想记忆
kinetic [kai'netik]

想一想再看

adj. 运动的,动力学的

联想记忆
spread [spred]

想一想再看

v. 伸展,展开,传播,散布,铺开,涂撒
n.

 
layer ['leiə]

想一想再看

n. 层
vi. 分层
vt. 将某

联想记忆
fulcrum ['fʌlkrəm]

想一想再看

n. 杠杆的支点,支点,[动物]转节

联想记忆
temperature ['tempritʃə(r)]

想一想再看

n. 温度,气温,体温,发烧

 
jar [dʒɑ:]

想一想再看

n. 不和谐,刺耳声,震动,震惊,广口瓶
vi

联想记忆
understand [.ʌndə'stænd]

想一想再看

vt. 理解,懂,听说,获悉,将 ... 理解为,认为<

 

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