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The Excuse Never Heard
没听说过的理由
A fellow bought a new Benz and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up.
一个人买了一辆新奔驰车，晚上开到州际公路去兜风。车顶篷放了下来，清风吹得他忘乎所以，他决定提起速度来跑一跑。
As the needle jumped up to 80 mph he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him.
当车速表的指针指向时速80英里的时候，他突然发现红蓝色的警灯一闪一闪地跟在后面。
"There's no way they can catch a Mercedes," he thought to himself and opened her up further. His needle hit 90, 100, 110 and finally 150. Then the reality of the situation hit him.
“他们怎么可能赶上大奔呢，”他想着，又加快了速度。指针指到了90，100，110，直到150。最后他终于意识到了现实情况。
"What the hell am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
“我这到底是在干什么？”他想着把车停到路边。
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word, and examined it and the car.
警察走上来，一声不吭地拿走他的驾照查看，又看了看他的车。
Finally he came to the window looking steadily at the driver and said, "I've had a tough shift and this is my last pull over. I don't feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your speeding that I haven't heard before, you can go!"
终于警察走到车窗前，沉静地看着他说：“你是我下班前拦的最后一辆车了，我这个班很辛苦，我现在也不想开罚单了，所以如果你能给我一个我从没听过的超速理由，我就放了你。”
The driver blinked only once while his brain scrambled for a reply.
那个人只惊奇了一下就开始搜肠刮肚地想如何回答。
"Last week my wife ran off with a cop," he said, "and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
“上个星期，我的妻子跟一个警察跑了，”他说，“我怕你追过来是要把她还回来！”
"Off you go," said the officer.
“你可以走了。”
