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Controlling your anger requires a desire to understand its source, and to take action to tamp it down.
You Will Need
Time
Quiet
A notebook
Visualization techniques
A sense of humor
Step 1: Count to 10（发脾气之前，心里默默倒数10下）
Declare a “time out” when you feel anger rising. Remove yourself from the situation. Counting to 10 can buy time to defuse your temper.
Step 2: Do something physical（让自己忙碌起来，出去走走，或者跑跑来缓解气氛）
Take a brisk walk or go for a run to exhaust an angry impulse. Swim, dig in the garden – anything that may interfere with the rush of negative feelings.
Step 3: Keep an anger log（将生气时，自己的想法写下来，这样可以帮助自己消气）
Log your thoughts in writing when anger intrudes. Recording these moments limits the effects of your rage.
Yoga and meditation can also temper the effects of rage.
Step 4: Practice deep breathing（快生气时，深呼吸来调整自己的情绪）
Correct patterns of thought through deep breathing, or visualize pleasant memories. Use a mantra or a private word that triggers a peaceful reflection. Listen to relaxing music.
Therapists and anger management professionals are trained to help you defuse anger.
Step 5: Practice expressing anger（试着将自己的愤怒情绪倾诉给第三方，来缓冲自己的愤怒）
Practice expressing anger to a neutral party. This allows you to clear the air before exhibiting behavior you might regret.
Carry small objects or pieces of paper with advice. These items can serve as cues to avoid sudden eruptions.
Step 6: Use “I” statements（在表述自己的想法时，最好用“我”开头，这样不会冲到其他人）
Think carefully before you speak. Use “I” statements, such as “I feel as if…,” so that you don’t offend someone by placing blame and escalating tensions.
Step 7: Use humor（试着用幽默的方式来缓和尴尬的场面）
Use humor to defuse friction. But be careful not to overestimate your charm.
Step 8: Ask yourself what you want（问问自己你最想要的是什么，事后多想想，自己的方式，多加改进）
Analyze what look, tone, speech, action – even breathing – you exhibited in anger. Return to the original situation and attempt a different approach.
Stress from anger sparks electrical changes in the heart that can lead to heart attacks.
