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Imagine that you're getting ready to go to a party.
假设你正准备去参加一个聚会。
You feel excited, but also nervous, and you've got this feeling in your stomach almost like another heartbeat.
你感到兴奋，但也有点紧张，你觉得胃部好像也在怦怦跳。
There's something holding you back, holding you back from getting too happy.
有什么东西在阻止你，不让你太开心。
"No, you mustn't get too happy. Better to be cautious, otherwise, something bad might happen."
“不，你不能太过开心。最好还是谨慎一点，不然会发生不好的事情的。”
You start wondering, "Who should I talk to when I get there?
你开始思考：“到了那儿之后我要跟谁讲话呢？
What if no one wants to talk to me? What if they'll think I'm weird?"
如果没有人跟我说话怎么办？如果大家都觉得我很奇怪怎么办？”
When you arrive at the party, someone comes up to you and starts talking with you,
等你到达聚会现场，有人来跟你聊天，
and as this is happening, your mind starts racing, your heart begins pounding,
你的大脑就开始飞速转动，你心跳加速，
you start sweating, and it feels almost like you're dissociating from yourself, like it's an out-of-body experience,
身上开始出汗，感觉就像你的意识跟身体分离了一样，
and you're just watching yourself talk.
像是你在看着自己跟别人对话。
"Keep it together," you say to yourself, but you can't.
“冷静点”，你对自己说，但你做不到。
And it's just getting worse: after a few minutes of conversation,
你的症状变得越来越严重：聊了几分钟之后，
the person you've been speaking to leaves, and you feel utterly defeated.
跟你聊天的人离开了，你觉得整个人都很挫败。
This has been happening to you in social situations for a long time.
这种情况经常在你面对的各种社交场合发生。
Or imagine every time you go out, and you're in crowded places, you feel this panic starting to arise.
设想一下，每次你出门，走在拥挤的人群中，你就开始感受到这种恐惧。
When you're surrounded by lots of people, like on a bus, you start to feel hot, nauseous, uneasy,
当你被很多人包围，比如在坐公交的时候，你会觉得热，反胃，各种不适，
and to prevent this from happening, you start avoiding a lot of places which makes you feel lonely and isolated.
为了防止出现这样的情况，你开始避免出现在一些会让你觉得被孤立的场合。
You or the person in both of these scenarios have anxiety disorders,
你以及适用以上症状的人都患有焦虑症，
and what I can tell you is that anxiety is very common, much more than people think.
我想说焦虑是非常普遍的现象，比很多人想象的要普遍的多。
Right now, one in 14 people around the world have an anxiety disorder,
现在，世界上十四分之一的人都患有焦虑症，
and each year, it costs over 42 billion dollars to treat this mental health problem.
每年用于治疗这种精神健康问题所花的费用达到了420亿美元。
To show you the impact that anxiety has on someone's life,
焦虑给人的生活带来的影响，
I will just mention that anxiety can lead to depression, school dropout, suicide.
包括但不仅限于导致抑郁、辍学和自杀。
It makes it harder to focus, and to hold down a job, and it can lead to relationship breakdown.
它让人难以集中精神，正常工作，还会导致亲密关系的破裂。
But a lot of people don't know this, that's why,
但很多人并不清楚这一点，正因为这样，
a lot of times, people sweep anxiety under the rug as just nerves that you need to get over,
很多时候人们只把焦虑当作你需要去克服的一种障碍，
as a weakness, but anxiety is so much more than that.
或是一种弱点，但焦虑症远不是如此。
A reason why so many people don't think it's important is that they don't know what it is.
很多人不把焦虑当回事就是因为他们并不了解它。
Is it your personality? Is it an illness? Is it a normal sensation? What is?
焦虑是你性格的一部分吗？它是一种疾病吗？它是人的一种常规感觉吗？它到底是什么？
That's why it's important to differentiate what is normal anxiety from what is an anxiety disorder.
因此区分正常的焦虑和焦虑症就十分重要。
Normal anxiety is an emotion that we all get when we're in stressful situations.
正常的焦虑是我们在身处于让我们感到有压力的环境时会感受到的一种情绪。
For example, let's say, you're out in the woods, and you come face-to-face with a bear.
比如，你在一片森林里，跟一只熊打了个照面。
This will probably make you feel a little bit anxious, and you'll probably want to start running like crazy.
这时你可能会有点紧张，你可能会想疯狂的逃跑。
This anxious feeling that you get is good because it protects you,
这种紧张的情绪是好的，因为它会保护你，
it saves you, and it makes you on a hightail it out of there,
救你的命，它让你快速逃离这个境地，
although maybe it's not such a good idea to start running when you see a bear.
尽管看见熊后立马逃走不是个很好主意。
I really don't think you can outrun a bear.
我觉得你应该跑不过熊。
Anxiety helps us meet our deadlines at work and deal with emergencies in life,
焦虑会帮我们去应对工作中的截止日期以及处理生活中的紧急事件，
but when this anxiety emotion is taken to the extreme and arises in situations which don't pose a real threat,
但当这种焦虑的情绪达到极致并且开始出现在对你没有威胁的环境中时，
then that's when you might have an anxiety disorder.
你有可能就患上了焦虑症。
For example, people with generalized anxiety disorder worry excessively and constantly about everything going on in their lives,
比如，患有焦虑症的人们普遍会持续地过度担心生活中的一切事情，
and they find it very difficult to control this worry.
他们会发现自己控制不了这种担忧的情绪。
They also have symptoms like restlessness, fear,
他们还会出现烦躁，恐惧的情绪，
they find it hard to fall asleep at night, and they can't concentrate on tasks.
晚上睡不着，工作时无法集中精神。
In spite of whatever kind of anxiety you might be suffering from, there is something that you can do to lower it.
无论你面临的焦虑是哪一种，总是有办法可以减轻这种症状的。
It works, and it's simpler than you may think.
它很有效并且比你猜想的要简单得多。
All too often, we're given medication for mental disorders, but it doesn't always work in the long run.
通常我们会给患有精神疾病的患者开药，但药物并起不了长期作用。
Symptoms often come back, and you're back to where you started.
这些症状总是反复，你又回到原来的状态中。
So here's something else to consider:
所以你应该考虑一下这一点：
the way you cope or handle things has a direct impact on how much anxiety you're experiencing,
你处理事情的方式对你感受到的焦虑的多少会造成直接影响，
and if you tweak the way you're coping, then you can lower your anxiety.
所以如果你改变处事方式，你就可以减轻自己的焦虑。
In our study at the University of Cambridge,
我们在剑桥大学的研究表明，
we showed that women living in poor areas have a higher risk for anxiety than women living in richer areas.
生活在贫困地区的女性患焦虑症的风险高于生活在富裕地区的女性。
These results didn't surprise us, but when we looked closer,
这些结果并不意外，但进行更谨慎地观察后，
we found that women living in poor areas, if they had a particular set of coping resources, they didn't have anxiety,
我们发现生活在贫困地区的有应对技巧的女性并没有患有焦虑症，
while women living in poor areas without these coping resources had anxiety.
而生活在贫困地区却没有这些技巧的女性患有焦虑症。
Other studies showed that people who had faced extreme circumstances,
其他研究也表明，面临过极端环境，
who had faced adversity, been through wars and natural disasters,
比如逆境，战争或自然灾害的人，
if they had coping resources, they remained healthy and free of mental disorders,
如果他们手中有应对的资源，就可以保持身心健康，免受精神疾病的困扰
while others, facing the same hardships but without coping skills went on a downward spiral and developed mental disorders.
而其他人，如果他们面临着同样的困难却没有正确的应对技巧，就会陷进漩涡，患上精神疾病。
So what are some of these coping resources, and how can we use them to lower our anxiety?
那么这些应对的技巧是什么，我们应该怎样利用他们来减轻焦虑呢？
And before I dive into what they are, I'd like to point out -- and I think this is so interesting
在开始研究我们是什么这个问题之前，我想指出一件事--一件有意思的事，
you can develop these coping resources or coping skills on your own through the things that you do;
你完全可以通过自己所做的事自己开发出应对的技巧和资源，
you can take charge of your anxiety and lower it, which I think is so empowering.
你可以控制你的焦虑并降低它，我觉得这些是很有用的。
Today I'll be talking about three coping resources, and the first one is feeling like you're in control of your life.
今天我来讲三个应对方法，第一就是要对自己的生活有控制感。
People who feel like they're more in control of their life have better mental health.
认为自己对生活的控制力强的人精神更加健康。
If you feel like you're lacking in control in life,
如果你认为自己缺乏对生活的控制力，
then research shows that you should engage in experiences that give you greater control.
调查显示，你应该去过让你感觉控制力更强的生活。
I'll show you what I mean:
我解释一下：
do you sometimes find that you put off starting something because you just don't feel ready enough?
你是否有时会因为觉得自己没有准备好而推迟做某事？
Do you find it hard to make decisions like what to wear, what to eat who to date, which job to take up?
你是否觉得难以决定要穿什么衣服，吃什么食物，跟谁约会，接受哪份工作？
Do you tend to waste a lot of time deciding what you might do while nothing gets done?
你是否经常浪费很多时间在下决定上，以至于最后什么事都没有做好？
A way to overcome indecision and this lack of control in life, is to do it badly.
克服犹豫不决和对生活缺乏控制感的一个办法就是，把这件事做的不完美。
There's a quote by writer and poet GK Chesterton that says, "Anything worth doing is worth doing badly the first time."
作家兼诗人GK·切斯特顿说过：“值得要去做的事第一次可以做的不完美。”
The reason why this works so well is that it speeds up your decision-making and catapults you straight into action,
这条规则有效的原因就在于它逼你快速决定并立刻开始行动，
otherwise, you can spend hours deciding how you should go about doing something or what you should do.
否则，你就会花好几个小时去决定你要怎么做以及做什么。
This can be paralyzing and can make you afraid to even begin.
这个过程会麻痹你，让你害怕开始。
All too often, we aim for perfection, but never end up doing anything
更普遍的现象是，我们一开始就追求完美，但最终一事无成，
because the standards that we set for ourselves are too high, they're intimidating,
因为我们给自己定下的目标太高，它让我们望而生畏，
which stresses us out so we delay starting something, or we might even abandon the whole thing altogether.
让我们承受的压力太大以至于迟迟不敢开始，甚至我们还有可能会干脆放弃这件事。
Do it badly frees you up to take action.
不追求完美可以让你放手去做。
I mean you know how it is:
你们懂的：
so often, we want to do something perfectly we can't start until it's the perfect time, until we've got all the skills,
我们总是想把某件事做的尽善尽美，于是就一直等最佳的时机出现，等掌握了全部的技巧才开始做，
but this can be daunting and stressful so why not just jump into it just do it however, without worrying if it's good or bad?
但这些东西会让人畏缩，会让人压力倍增，那为什么不放下一切直接开始呢，管它做的好或是坏。
This will make it that much easier to start something and as you're doing it badly to finish it,
这样一来，开始做一件事就简单得多，而当你并没有完美的完成后，
and when you look back, you'll realize, more often than not, that actually it's not that bad.
当你回头看，你会发现，结果其实也没你想象的那么糟糕。
A close friend of mine who has anxiety started using this motto, and this is what she said,
我的一个患有焦虑症的好朋友也开始用这一法则为座右铭，她说，
"When I started using this motto, my life transformed.
“当我开始信奉这一法则时，我的生活发生了改变。
I found I could complete tasks in much shorter time periods than before.
我发现我完成任务的时间比以前缩短了很多。
Do it badly gave me wings to take risks, to try something differently, and to have way more fun during the whole process.
不追求完美给了我冒险和尝试不同方法的勇气，也让我在整个过程中获得了更多乐趣。
It took the anxiety out of everything and replaced it with excitement."
它带走了焦虑，取而代之的是兴奋。”
So do it badly, and you can improve as you go along.
不追求完美，你就可以取得进步。
I'd like to ask you to think about this: if you start using this motto today, how would your life change?
我想让大家思考一个问题：如果你今天开始使用这一原则，你的生活将会发生怎样的变化？
The second coping strategy is to forgive yourself, and this is very powerful if you use it.
第二种应对方式是原谅自己，如果你使用这个方法，就会发现他很有效。
People with anxiety think a lot about what they're doing wrong, their worries, and how bad they're feeling.
有焦虑症的人会想很多他们做的错事，他们担心的事，回想他们的心情有多糟糕。
Imagine if you had a friend who constantly pointed out everything you're doing wrong, and everything that was wrong with your life.
想想看你的朋友不停的指出你做了什么错事，告诉你你有多不幸。
You would probably want to get rid of this person right away, wouldn't you?
你可能会想马上理她远远的，不是吗？
Well, people with anxiety do this to themselves all day long. They're not kind to themselves.
有焦虑症的人每天都在对自己做着一样的事。他们对自己不够友善。
So maybe it's time to start being kinder with ourselves, time to start supporting ourselves,
也许是时候对我们自己善良一点了，是时候开始支持自己了，
and a way to do this is to forgive yourself for any mistakes you think you might have made just a few moments ago to mistakes made in the past.
具体办法就是原谅自己的过错，包括你几分钟之前犯下的以及过去犯下的。
If you had a panic attack and are embarrassed about it, forgive yourself;
如果你害怕某件事并对此觉得尴尬，原谅自己；
if you wanted to talk to someone, but couldn't muster up the courage to do so, don't worry about it, let it go;
如果你想跟某人聊天，但是没有勇气，别担心，放过自己；
forgive yourself for anything and everything and this will give you greater compassion towards yourself.
原谅自己的一切，这会让你给自己更多的同情心。
You can't begin to heal until you do this.
只有开始你才能治疗自己。
And last but not least, having a purpose and meaning in life is a very important coping mechanism.
最后但最重要的是，生活中有一个目标或是意义是最有效的应对方法。
Whatever we do in life, whatever work we produce, however much money we make,
无论我们做什么，无论是什么工作，无论我们挣多少钱，
we cannot be fully happy until we know that someone else needs us,
我们要到知道有人需要我们的时候才会完全开心起来，
that someone else depends on our accomplishments, or on the love that we have to share.
需要有人依赖于我们的成果或是我们分享的爱。
It's not that we need other people's good words to keep going in life,
并不是我们需要别人夸赞的言语鼓励我们好好生活，
but if we don't do something with someone else in mind, then we're at much higher risk for poor mental health.
而是如果我们做某件事的时候心里没有想着某个人，我们的精神状况就面临着更大的风险。
The famous neurologist Dr. Victor Frankel said,
著名的神经学家维克多·弗兰克尔博士说过，
"For people who think there's nothing to live for and nothing more to expect from life,
“对于那些觉得生活没有目的性的人来说，
the question is getting these people to realize that life is still expecting something from them."
最重要的事就是帮助他们意识到生活对他们还有所期待。”
Doing something with someone else in mind can carry you through the toughest times.
做事的时候心里想着一个人可以帮助你渡过难关。
You'll know the why for your existence and will be able to bear almost any how; almost any how.
你会明白存在的意义，会有能力去承担几乎一切，几乎一切。
So the question is do you do at least one thing with someone else in mind?
问题在于，你有没有至少在做一件事的时候心里想着某个人？
This could be volunteering, or it could be sharing this knowledge that you gained today with other people,
这件事可能是志愿服务，或者可能是把你今天学到的东西分享给其他人，
especially those who need it most, and these are often the people who don't have money for therapy,
特别是那些最需要知道的人，这些通常是没有钱去治疗的人，
and they're usually the ones with the highest rates of anxiety disorders.
也是焦虑症最严重的人。
Give it to them, share with others, because it can really improve your mental health.
把这些知识分享给他们，因为这也同样有利于你的精神健康。
So I would like to conclude with this:
我想于此做个总结：
another way you can do something with someone else in mind is finishing work that might benefit future generations.
还有一件让你心怀别人的事情就是去做可能惠及后代的事。
Even if these people will never realize what you've done for them, it doesn't matter,
即使这些人永远也意识不到你为他们做了什么，也没关系，
because you will know, and this will make you realize the uniqueness and importance of your life. Thank you.
因为你会知道，并且你会意识到自己生命的独一无二和重要性。谢谢。
