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So my story starts on July 4, 1992, the day my mother followed her college sweetheart to New York City from Egypt.
我的故事从1992年7月4号开始，那一天我的妈妈跟着她大学恋人，从埃及到了纽约。
As fireworks exploded behind the skyline, my father looked at my mother jokingly and said,
烟花在他们身后的天际线上绽开，爸爸看着妈妈，开玩笑说道：
"Look, habibti, Americans are celebrating your arrival."
“看，Habibti，美国在庆祝你的到来。”
Unfortunately, it didn't feel much like a celebration when, growing up,
不幸的是，实际的感觉并不像是庆祝，在我长大的时候，
my mother and I would wander past Queens into New York City streets,
我的妈妈和我会经过皇后区进入纽约城的街道，
and my mother with her hijab and long flowy dresses would tighten her hand around my small fingers
我的妈妈戴着头巾，穿着长长的裙子，用手紧紧地牵着我的手指，
as she stood up against weathered comments like,
面对着那些”老生常谈“般的侮辱话语：
"Go back to where you came from," "Learn English," "Stupid immigrant."
“从哪儿来回哪儿去”，“去学英语”，“愚蠢的移民”。
These words were meant to make us feel unsafe, insecure in our own neighborhoods, in our own skin.
这些话语，让我们在自己的社区深深地感到不安。
But it was these same streets that made me fall in love with New York.
但是也正是这些同样的街道让我爱上了纽约。
Queens is one of the most diverse places in the world,
皇后区是世界上最多元的地方之一，
with immigrant parents holding stories that always start with something between three and 15 dollars in a pocket,
在这里移民家长们的故事往往这么开头，比如口袋里只有三到十五美元，
a voyage across a vast sea and a cash-only hustle sheltering families in jam-packed, busted apartments.
比如一段长长的跨洋航行和一份只有现金的零工，可以让家庭住在拥挤不堪的公寓里。
And it was these same families that worked so hard to make sure that we had safe microcommunities, we, as immigrant children,
同样是这些家庭，他们非常努力地工作以确保我们--移民的下一代可以有安全的小社区，
to feel affirmed and loved in our identities.
可以对自己的身份确信并热爱。
But it was mostly the women.
但是这大部分是女性。
And these women are the reason why, regardless of these statements that my mom faced, she remained unapologetic.
正是因为这些女性，当我的妈妈面对那样的言论时，她没有道歉。
And these women were some of the most powerful women I have ever met in my entire life.
这些女性是我整个人生中遇到的最有力量的女性之一。
I mean, they had networks for everything.
我的意思是，任何事情，她们都有关系网。
They had rotations for who watched whose kids when,
她们有轮换制，要求谁什么时候照看谁的孩子，
for saving extra cash, for throwing belly dance parties and memorizing Koran and learning English.
她们会存下额外的现金，会举办肚皮舞派对，会记忆古兰经并学习英语。
And they would collect small gold tokens to fundraise for the local mosque.
她们也会收集小金币为当地清真寺募捐。
And it was these same women, when I decided to wear my hijab, who supported me through it.
当我决定戴上我的头巾时，同样是这些女性，一直支持着我。
And when I was bullied for being Muslim,
当我因穆斯林身份遭到欺凌时，
I always felt like I had an army of unapologetic North African aunties who had my back.
我一直感觉身后有一只军队在支持我，一只由不低头的北非阿姨组成的军队。
And so every morning at 15, I would wake up and stand in front of a mirror,
所以15岁的每个早晨，我会醒来站在镜子面前，
and wrap beautiful bright silk around my head the way my mother does and my grandmother did.
把美丽光泽的丝巾绕在我的头上，就像我妈妈和祖母做的一样。
And one day that summer 2009, I stepped out into the streets of New York City
2009年夏天的某一天，我在纽约街上，
on my way to volunteer at a domestic violence organization that a woman in my neighborhood had started.
准备作为志愿者参加反家庭暴力组织的活动，这个组织是由我邻居中的一位女性开办的。
And I remember at that moment I felt a yank at the back of my head.
我记得那时我感觉后脑勺一阵猛拉。
Then someone pulled and grabbed me, trying to remove my hijab from off of my head.
然后一个人又拉又拽，想要把我的头巾拉扯下来。
I turned around to a tall, broad-shouldered man, pure hate in his eyes.
我转身，看到一个高高的宽肩男人，眼睛里全是仇恨。
I struggled and fought back, and finally was able to get away,
我挣扎着反击，终于逃脱，
hid myself in the bathroom of that organization and cried and cried.
我躲在那个组织场所的卫生间里，一直在哭。
I kept thinking to myself, "Why does he hate me? He doesn't even know me."
我不停地问自己，“为什么他恨我？他甚至不认识我。”
Hate crimes against Muslims in the US increased by 1,600 percent post-9/11,
在美国，911之后，针对穆斯林的仇恨犯罪上涨了1600%，
and one in every four women in the US will suffer some form of gender violence.
并且在美国四分之一的女性会遭受性别暴力。
And it may not seem like it, but Islamophobia and anti-Muslim violence is a form of gender violence,
也许看上去不像那么回事，但是伊斯兰恐惧症和反穆斯林暴力是性别暴力的一种形式，
given the visibility of Muslim women in our hijabs.
因为穆斯林女性穿戴头巾十分显眼。
And so I was not alone, and that horrified me.
我不是个例，这让我害怕。
It made me want to do something. It made me want to go out there and make sure that no one I loved,
这让我想做一些事。这让我想做些事确保我所爱的人，
that no woman would have to feel this insecure in her own skin.
所有女性都能感到真正的安全。
So I started to think about how the women in my own neighborhood were able to build community for themselves,
所以我开始想，自己街区的女性如何能够为她们自己建造社区，
and how they were able to use the very little resources they had to actually offer something.
以及她们如何能利用仅有的资源做出实事。
And I began to think about what I could potentially offer to build safety and power for women.
然后我开始想我可以提供些什么来为女性提供安全和力量。
And through this journey, I learned a couple of things,
通过这次经历，我学到了一些事情，
and this is what I want to share with you today, some of these lessons.
而今天我想分享这些心得。
So lesson number one: start with what you know.
第一点：从你知道的部分开始。
At the time, I had been doing Shotokan karate for as long as I could remember, and so I had a black belt.
当时，我记得我在打松涛馆跆拳道，并且有个黑带。
Yeah. And so, I thought -- surprise.
是吧，我觉得...哈哈，没想到吧。
I thought that maybe I should go out into my neighborhood and teach self-defense to young girls.
我想也许我应该深入街区教年轻女性自卫技巧。
And so I actually went out and knocked on doors, spoke to community leaders, to parents, to young women,
所以我的确走出去了，挨家挨户地敲门，和社区领导、家长、年轻女性对话，
and finally was able to secure a free community center basement
最终得到了一个免费的社区中心地下室，
and convince enough young women that they should come to my class.
并确保有足够多的年轻女性到我的班级来。
And it actually all worked out, because when I pitched the idea, most of the responses were, like,
这么做的确有用，因为当我推出这个想法的时候，大多数的回应是，
"All right, cute, this 5'1" hijabi girl who knows karate. How nice."
“行，挺可爱，这个一米五、戴着头巾的女孩知道怎么打跆拳道。有意思。”
But in reality, I became the Queens, New York version of Mr. Miyagi at 16 years old,
但事实上，我在16岁，成为了纽约皇后区的Miyagi先生，
and I started teaching 13 young women in that community center basement self-defense.
并且开始在那个地下室教13个年轻女孩自卫术。
And with every single self-defense move, for eight sessions over the course of that summer,
那个夏天八节课，通过防卫术练习的一招一式，
we began to understand the power of our bodies, and we began to share our experiences about our identities.
我们开始理解自己身体的力量，开始分享关于自身身份个性的经验。
And sometimes there were shocking realizations, and other times there were tears, but mostly it was laughs.
有的时候有惊人的认识，有的时候有泪水，但大部分是欢笑。
And I ended that summer with this incredible sisterhood, and I began to feel much safer in my own skin.
那个夏天之后，我收获了珍贵的姐妹情，并发自内心感觉更加安全。
And it was because of these women that we just kept teaching.
正因为这些女性，我们可以一直开班教授。
I never thought that I would continue, but we just kept teaching.
我从没想过我可以继续，但我们确实一直在教。
And today, nine years, 17 cities, 12 countries, 760 courses and thousands of women and girls later, I'm still teaching.
今天，经历了9年、17个城市、12个国家、760堂课程以及上千名女性，我依旧在教。
And what started as a self-defense course in the basement of a community center
而一开始社区中心地下室的自卫防身课程，
is now an international grassroots organization focused on building safety and power for women around the world: Malikah.
现在已经成为国际性民间组织，聚焦于为全世界的女性建构安全和力量：Malikah。
Now, for lesson number two: start with who you know.
现在，讲讲我学到的第二点：从你知道的人开始。
Oftentimes, it could be quite exciting, especially if you're an expert in something and you want to have impact,
经常，这可以很有意思，尤其当你是某个领域的专家，想要发挥影响，
to swoop into a community and think you have the magic recipe.
猛地进入一个社区，觉得自己有魔法配方。
But very early on I learned that, as esteemed philosopher Kendrick Lamar once said,
但是我很早之前就知道，备受推崇的“哲学家”肯德拉克·拉马尔曾说过，
it's really important to be humble and to sit down.
谦卑并坐下来是十分重要的。
So, basically, at 15 years old, the only community that I had any business doing work with
因此，15岁的时候，和我基本有来往合作的团体，
were the 14-year-old girls in my neighborhood, and that's because I was friends with them.
只有附近14岁的女孩们，因为我和她们是朋友。
Other than that, I didn't know what it meant to be a child of Bengali immigrants in Brooklyn or to be Senegalese in the Bronx.
除此之外，我并不了解在布鲁克林作为孟加拉移民孩子或在布朗克斯作为塞内加尔移民的孩子意味着什么。
But I did know young women who were connected to those communities,
但我认识和这些社区有联系的年轻女性，
and it was quite remarkable how they already had these layers of trust and awareness and relationship with their communities.
而且了不起的是，她们已经和社区建立起信任、意识和联系。
So like my mother and the women in her neighborhood, they had these really strong social networks,
所以就像我母亲和她邻近区域的女性那样，这些年轻女性拥有十分强大的社交网络，
and it was about providing capacity and believing in other women's definition of safety.
并能提供能力，相信其他女性对于安全的定义。
Even though I was a self-defense instructor,
尽管我是一个自卫训练师，
I couldn't come into a community and define safety for any other woman who was not part of my own community.
我不能进入一个社区，为不是自己社区的女性定义安全。
And it was because, as our network expanded, I learned that self-defense is not just physical.
因为，随着我们网络的扩张，我学到自卫不仅是身体上的。
It's actually really emotional work. I mean, we would do a 60-minute self-defense class,
而是心理上的。我的意思是，我们会做60分钟的自卫课，
and then we'd have 30 minutes reserved for just talking and healing.
然后我们会留30分钟单纯聊天治愈。
And in those 30 minutes,
在那30分钟里，
women would share what brought them to the class to begin with but also various other experiences with violence.
女性一开始会分享参加课程的原因，但是也会分享和暴力相关的其他经验。
And, as an example, one time in one of those classes,
比如说，有一次在其中一堂课上，
one woman actually started to talk about the fact that she had been in a domestic violence relationship for over 30 years,
一位女性开始倾诉，说30多年来她一直处于一段家暴关系中，
and it was her first time being able to articulate that because we had established that safe space for her.
这是她第一次有机会说出来，因为我们为她提供了一个安全的空间。
So it's powerful work,
这份工作充满力量，
but it only happens when we believe in women's agency to define what safety and what power looks like for themselves.
但只有当我们相信女性有能力为自身定义安全和力量时，这才会发生。
All right, for lesson number three -- and this was the hardest thing for me
好，我学到的第三课--对我来说是最难的，
the most important thing about this work is to start with the joy.
对这项工作来说最重要的就是快乐地开始。
When I started doing this work, I was reacting to a hate-based attack,
当我开始这个项目时，我要回应充满仇恨的攻击，
so I was feeling insecure and anxious and overwhelmed. I was really afraid.
所以我充满不安、焦虑、备受打击。我当时十分害怕。
And it makes sense, because if you take a step back,
这是合理的，因为如果你退一步，
and I can imagine that a lot of women in this room can probably relate to this, the feeling,
我能想象这里很多女性也许都能感同身受，
an overwhelming feeling of insecurity, is oftentimes with us constantly.
这种强烈的不安全感，经常伴随着我们。
I mean, imagine this: walking home late at night, hearing footsteps behind you.
我的意思是，想象一下：在夜里走回家，听见身后响起脚步声。
You wonder if you should walk faster or if you should slow down.
你在想是要走得快一点还是慢下来。
You keep your keys in your hand in case you need to use them.
你紧紧攥着钥匙以备不时之需。
You say, "Text me when you get home. I want to make sure you are safe."
你说，“到家时给我发个信息。我想确保你安全到达。”
And we mean those words. We're afraid to put down our drinks.
而我们对此十分认真。我们害怕，不敢放下饮料。
We're afraid to speak too much or too little in a meeting.
我们害怕在一个会议中讲得太多或是太少。
And imagine being woman and black and trans and queer and Latinx and undocumented and poor and immigrant,
想象一个女性，或者黑人、跨性别者、同性恋、拉丁裔或是未注册的、贫穷的移民，
and you could then only imagine how overwhelming this work can be, especially within the context of personal safety.
那么你才能明白这项工作多么沉重，特别是关于个人安全的工作。
However, when I took a step to reflect on what brought me to this work to begin with,
然而，当我思考这项工作的初衷时，
I began to realize it was actually the love that I had for women in my community.
我意识到一切始于我对我社区之中女性的爱。
It was the way I saw them gather, their ability to build for each other,
她们的团结，她们支撑彼此的能力
that inspired me to keep doing this work day in and day out.
激励我每天继续这项工作。
So whether I was in a refugee camp in Jordan or a community center in Dallas, Texas or a corporate office in Silicon Valley,
所以不管是在约旦的难民营里，还是在德克萨斯州达拉斯的社区中心里，或是硅谷公司的办公室里，
women gathered in beautifully magical ways and they built together
女性汇聚在一起，充满美丽和魔力，
and supported each other in ways that shifted culture to empower and build safety for women.
互相支持，以此转变文化，为女性赋权、构建安全。
And that is how the change happens. It was through those relationships we built together.
这就是改变如何发生的。通过我们共筑的关系发生。
That's why we don't just teach self-defense,
因此我们不只是教自卫术，
but we also throw dance parties and host potlucks and write love notes to each other and sing songs together.
我们也会举办派对，组织聚餐，给彼此写爱心便签，并且一起唱歌。
And it's really about the friendship, and it's been so, so fun.
这一切都关乎友谊，而且很有意思。
So the last thing I want to leave you with is that the key takeaway for me in teaching self-defense all of these years
所以最后我想分享一点，是我在这几年教授防身术中学到的关键一点，
is that I actually don't want women, as cool as the self-defense moves are, to go out and use these self-defense techniques.
那就是尽管防身术招式很酷，但实际上我不想女性走出去会用到这些自卫技巧。
I don't want any woman to have to de-escalate any violent situation.
我希望任何女性都不用去化解任何暴力情况。
But for that to happen, the violence shouldn't happen, and for the violence not to happen,
但是如果要达到这一点，暴力就不应该出现，如果想要不出现暴力，
the systems and the cultures that allow for this violence to take place to begin with needs to stop.
那么允许暴力发生的系统和文化需要开始停止。
And for that to happen, we need all hands on deck.
要达到这一点，我们需要所有人的参与。
So I've given you my secret recipe, and now it's up to you.
所以，我已经告诉了你们我的秘密配方，现在这取决于你。
To start with what you know, to start with who you know and to start with joy.
从你知道的事务开始，从你知道的人开始，带着乐趣开始。
But just start. Thank you so much.
但最重要的是要开始行动。非常感谢。
