It's April. Can you believe it's April?

Spring break is here. People are going crazy.

They're drunk-dancing on tables, getting piercings in places that only a doctor should see.

If you're getting a piercing where you can only see it with a handheld mirror,

I think that you're drinking too much, I think.

People usually come back from spring break with two things-- a sunburn and a hangover.

And I think I know why.

Because the swimsuits are getting smaller and the drinks are getting bigger.

The way drinking has evolved is crazy.

I want to show you what has happened.

In the beginning, people drank out of this, out of a goblet.

And you would drink one glass of wine.

And then you'd get a little buzzed and a little dizzy,

but not from alcohol, from the lead poisoning, really.

These would sometimes lead to wet corset contests.

I-- I almost didn't do it. I didn't think it was good.

I did it anyway. All right.

Then they invented this. This is a shot glass.

And it was so you could get all the alcohol without any of that annoying juice.

And I like it because it's efficient.

And it does the job of a regular-sized drink but in half the time.

Now I'm buzzed. All right.

And from there, things got completely out of control.

This-- you know, I thought this was a joke this morning when I saw it.

But apparently it's not a joke.

How many people have seen this before?

I don't know where y'all go, but I don't have-- it's called a fishbowl cocktail.

And you know the old saying, drink like a fish?

Now you literally can drink like a fish.

This has vodka, rum, tequila, pineapple juice, coconut juice, lemon.

It's a mix of everything except good decisions. All right.

Then someone invented this. And it's called a beer tower.

And this is great if you want to throw a bachelor party for your friend and a going away party for your liver.

And I know what you're thinking.

That's nice, but I don't drink beer.

Well-- oh, god-- then there's this.

So this is a-- this is a yardstick.

It has a strap. And you can walk around and show everyone your drinking problem.

You can just-- All right.

Then, finally, if you need more alcohol, this is a Bongzilla.

Nothing good has ever come after the sentence, want to try my Bongzilla?

All right. I'm going to show you how this works.

I don't drink beer. So I'm going to pour my favorite tequila-- Casa Dragones tequila.

There it is. And so what happens?

How much-- does that whole bottle fit in there? Mhm.

Uh-huh. All right. And then--

Zenor, I don't want to do it. You do it.

Wow! It's amazing.