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TV He drives for the basket, two seconds, he's up, it's good!
Mike Jason and Ben: (cheering)
TV And the Knicks tie it up! We go into overtime!
Jason: Alright here we go!
Maggie: Jason! Chrissy and I are getting tired of waiting out in the car. You said the game
would be over in thirty seconds.
Jason: Great news, honey, the Knicks just tied it up, we're heading into overtime!
Maggie: No, we're not. We're going to Chrissy's playschool.
Jason: Hon...honey, hey, relax, relax, there's not gonna be any traffic out there. Everybody
who calls himself an American is watching this game.
Maggie: Jason! What's more important here, this silly game or Chrissy's first day at school?
Jason: Hey, hey, hey, did I mention it was overtime? I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming.
Carol: Good, you guys are still here. Here Chrissy, it's my old animal pencil case, with the
elephant eraser and the zebra sharpener.
Maggie: Oh, it's so sweet of you, isn't it hon... Honey!
Jason: Yep, yep, yep. Just putting on my coat.
Maggie: You're wearing your coat.
Jason: OK, then we have a couple more minutes.
Mike: Dad, did you take me to my first day at pre-school?
Jason: Yeah, yeah. Missed the seventh game of the world series because of you.
Ben: What about me?
Jason: Missed the Reagan-Carter debate. That's why you've always been my favourite.
Maggie: Look Jason if you don't wanna go...
Jason: I wanna go! I'm coming! I wanna go! I've been waiting for Carol to stop babbling here
so we could hit the road.
Carol: Mom, Dad, I just think it's wonderful that you two are willing to start all over again with
Chrissy, at your age.
Just yesterday there was a segment on Operah, People with Kids.
Teacher: Is everybody ready for the toothbrush?
Kids: Yeah!
Teacher: Everybody brush your teeth! Ready, this is it! Up and down, all around, everybody
sit!
Maggie: Jason, they're so young.
Jason: Course they're young, honey, they're two.
Maggie: Not the kids, the parents.
Jason: Oh, they're not all that young.
Laurie: Excuse me, Dr. and Mrs. Seaver, I'm Laurie McNeill, I used to date Mike.
Jason: Oh, yeah, hi Laurie.
Laurie: Hi. Hi.
Maggie: Hi. And you have a beautiful baby.
Laurie: Thank you, this is Canaan.
Maggie: Hi Canaan.
Jason: Yeah, look at that, he's got dimples just like Mike.
Laurie: Yeah, there's a reason for that.
Jason: Huh?
Laurie: His Daddy has dimples like Mike's too.
Maggie: Oh, his Daddy does!
Laurie: Yes.
Maggie: Oh.
Jason: Oh, that's wonderful.
Laurie: It was nice seeing you guys.
Jason: Oh, so that's what a stroke feels like.
Teacher: Hi, I'm Sally Garner, welcome!
Maggie: Hi, Maggie and Jason Seaver and this is Chrissy.
Teacher: Hi Chrissy, I am so glad you are in our class.
Maggie: Well thanks.
Teacher: You know all the young parents can certainly profit from your mature experience.
Maggie: Mature! Well, we do plan to pass on so much of what we learned during world war
two.
Teacher: Really?
Jason: Na, na, na, na, I think my wife was just making a little joke there.
Teacher: You remind me of my mom, she's always making jokes that nobody gets.
Maggie: How nice.
Teacher: Come on Chrissy! I have some new friends over here that I want you to meet.
Jason: Come on Maggie, don't take it personally. She's just a kid. Maggie!
Maggie: Jason, we're the oldest parents here.
Jason: We are not! Come on, there's a guy our age. Hello, that looks like fun.
Man: It sure is. Hang on, honey.
Maggie: Your daughter sure is adorable.
Man: Granddaughter. Granddaughter. Yep, my kids stuck Grandpa with babysitting duty again.
But obviously you two know how that goes.
Maggie: It's ten fifteen, Jason, ten fifteen.
Jason: Maggie, easy, come on, Ben's only fifteen minutes late for his curfew.
Maggie: I don't need this after the day had!
Jason: What does the day we had have to do with Ben blowing curfew?
Maggie: Everything. Jason, do realise that we're going to be creaming kids for missing curfews
for at least another sixteen years. By then I'll look like one of the Golden Girls.
Jason: Maggie, don't even joke about that.
Maggie: I'm not, Jason, do you realise how old I'll be when we're going through this with
Chrissy?
Jason: Yes. A year older than me. Bad time for that one.
Mike: Hi guys, I'm not here, don't wait up!
Jason: Wait, wait, wait, you're going out now? Come on, it's after ten!
Mike: Come on, Dad, the party won't be going good till at least one or two.
Maggie: Mike!
Mike: Guys, guys, lighten up! Weren't you two ever young?
Maggie: Not that I can recall.
Mike: What'd I say?
Jason: Oh, just the worst possible thing at the worst possible time.
Mike: I didn't mean it.
Jason: You've got a gift. Get out, Mike.
Mike: You got it.
Jason: Honey, come on, I think you're over reacting... You know sometimes I'm glad Ben is
such a klutz; it makes him easier to catch.
Maggie: No, let me. I'm in the mood to chew somebody out.
Jason: Better him than me.
Maggie: Ben Seaver! Freeze! Do you happen to know what time it is, young man?
Ben: My watch says eight thirty. Good night.
Maggie: It is ten fifteen, Ben.
Ben: Well that's why the night seemed to drag on and on.
Maggie: I said, freeze, Mr. And I want the truth.
Ben: Oh, Mom, Dad, I'm sorry; I didn't think you'd still be awake.
Maggie: Oh, you think it's tough to stay up past ten!
Ben: It always has been.
Jason: So, you just figured you'd just sneak in; nobody'd be the wiser, huh?
Ben: Isn't the important thing here, that I'm home safe?
Maggie: Who says you're safe?
Jason: Ben, Ben, Ben, don't you think your mother and I are gonna get just a little tired of
having this conversation over and over again?
Ben: Well, then imagine how I feel.
Maggie: Ben, can the wise-guy stuff, I am in no mood.
Ben: Well then maybe we should talk about this in the morning...when you're fresh.
Maggie: I am plenty fresh. Now Ben, this is getting old, you have got to learn to listen. Now,
what do you have to say for yourself...and it better not be any back-talk.
Ben: Well...
Maggie: And don't tell me you're sorry.
Ben: Mom...
Maggie: I'm waiting!
Jason: Maggie...
Maggie: What?
Jason: why don't you and I have a word in the kitchen?
Maggie: Ah, Jason, I am busy here.
Jason: Maggie, the kitchen!
Maggie: Why?
Jason: Because I don't want Ben to see us arguing!
Maggie: Ben, if you move, or even think of moving before we get back, I'll...I'll do something
incredible! What is it Jason? What? I was just on a roll out there. I mean, he's gotta know that
we can keep up with me, that we're one step ahead!
Jason: Aw, Maggie, come on! The kid was just fifteen minutes late.
Maggie: Oh, just fifteen minutes late! Just fifteen minutes late! Well the next thing you know,
he's a hundred and fifteen minutes late...and then he stays out all night, and then he falls into
group of hardened criminals and the next thing you know, he's hiding out at the Vatican
embassy!
Jason: Sweetheart!
Maggie: Oh, you think I'm being irrational, don't you?
Jason: Well, I...
Maggie: Ha! Don't you? Huh?
