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When I was 14, my parents intended to marry me off to a man of their choosing. I refused.
在我14岁的时候，我的父母打算把我嫁给一个他们选的男人。我拒绝了。
That choice to defy my family shaped everything in my life and set me on the path to become who I am today.
那个违抗家人的选择改变了我生活的一切，让我成为了今天的我。
But it was very painful at times and continues to be so.
但这有时很痛苦，而且会继续痛苦下去。
My parents were raised in traditional, uneducated Moroccan families where a girl's main value is measured by her virginity.
我的父母在没有受过教育的传统摩洛哥家庭长大，在那里，一个女孩的主要价值是由她的童贞来衡量的。
They emigrated to Belgium, and I was born, raised and educated there.
之后他们移民到了比利时，我在那出生，成长和接受教育。
I did not accept their view of the world.
我不接受他们对世界的看法。
When I said no to them, I paid for it dearly in terms of physical and emotional abuse.
当我对他们说不时，在承受身体和情感的虐待上，我都付出了巨大的代价。
But eventually, I escaped from their home and became a federal police detective who could help protect the rights of others.
但是最终，我逃离了他们的家，成为了一位联邦警探，可以帮助他人，保护他们的权利。
My specialty was investigating cases in counterterrorism, child abduction and homicide.
我的专注领域是调查反恐案件，儿童绑架和凶杀案。
I loved that work, and it was extremely fulfilling.
我爱这个工作，它使我非常有成就感。
With my Muslim background, Arabic language skills and an interest in working internationally, I decided to seek new challenges.
以我的穆斯林背景，阿拉伯语能力和对从事国际工作的兴趣，我决定去寻求新的挑战。
After decades of being a police officer, I was recruited to become an investigator of sexual and gender-based violence
在当了几十年的警察后，我受聘成为了一名性暴力和性别暴力案件调查员，
as a member of the Justice Rapid Response and UN Women roster.
加入了司法快速响应组织和联合国妇女署。
Justice Rapid Response is an organization for criminal investigations of mass atrocities.
司法快速响应是一个对大规模暴行进行刑事调查的机构。
They run on both public and private funding and provide evidence and reports to more than 100 participating countries.
他们依靠公共和私人资金资助，为超过100个参与国提供证据和报告。
Many countries in conflict are often unable to provide a just process to those who have been victims of mass violence.
许多冲突下的国家往往无法为遭受大规模暴力之害的人们提供公正的审判程序。
To respond to that, Justice Rapid Response was created in partnership with UN Women.
为了做出回应，司法快速响应组织与联合国妇女署共同合作。
Together, Justice Rapid Response and UN Women recruited, trained and certified more than 250 professionals
司法快速响应组织与联合国妇女署一起录用、培训并认证了超过250名
with a specific expertise in sexual and gender-based violence, like me.
和我一样在性暴力和基于性别的暴力方面具有特定专业知识的专业人士。
Our investigations are carried out under international law,
我们的调查依据国际法进行，
and our findings eventually become evidence to prosecute war criminals.
我们的调查成果最终成为了起诉战争罪犯的证据。
This mechanism provides hope to victims that justice and accountability may someday be found in the wake of war and conflict.
这一机制给受害者带来了希望，即战争和冲突之后正义和责任总有一天会出现。
Let me tell you about the most challenging work I have ever done. This was in Iraq.
让我来告诉你们我做过的最有挑战的一项工作。那是在伊拉克。
Since the rise of the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, or ISIS,
自从伊拉克和叙利亚伊斯兰国，也就是ISIS的出现，
this group has systematically attacked and tortured many religious minorities and ethnicities,
这个组织已经系统的攻击和折磨了许多宗教少数民族和种族，
such as the Christians, the Shia Turkmen, Shia Muslims, Shia Shabaks and the Yazidis.
例如基督徒，什叶派土库曼，什叶派穆斯林，什叶派沙巴克和雅兹迪。
The persecution of the Yazidis has been especially horrific.
对雅兹迪人的迫害尤其恐怖。
On the 3rd and 15th of August 2014, ISIS attacked approximately 20 villages and towns in Sinjar, Iraq.
在2014年8月3号和15号，ISIS袭击了伊拉克辛贾尔的大约20个村庄和城镇。
They executed all the males over the age of 14, including the elderly and disabled.
他们处决了所有14岁以上的男性，包括老人和残疾人。
They divided up the women and girls, raped them and sold them into sexual and domestic slavery.
他们将妇女和女孩分开，强奸她们，并把她们卖做性奴和家庭奴役。
One month later, a UN Human Rights Council resolution led to the fact-finding mission on Iraq
一个月之后，联合国人权理事会的一项决议开启了对伊拉克的实况考察任务，
to investigate and document alleged violations and abuses committed by ISIS and associated groups.
调查和记录ISIS和相关团体犯下的暴力和虐待事件。
I was sent to investigate the atrocities committed against the Yazidis, with a focus on sexual and gender-based crimes.
我被派去调查针对雅兹迪人的暴行，重点关注性犯罪和基于性别的犯罪。
The Yazidis are a Kurdish-speaking ethnoreligious community based in Northern Iraq.
雅兹迪是在伊拉克北部的、讲库尔德语的种族宗教团体。
Their belief system incorporates aspects of Judaism, Christianity, Islam and Zoroastrianism.
他们的信仰体系融合了犹太教、基督教、伊斯兰教和琐罗亚斯德教。
For hundreds of years, Muslims and Christians who do not understand their beliefs have condemned the Yazidis as devil worshippers.
几百年来，不理解他们信仰的穆斯林和基督徒把雅兹迪人当作恶魔崇拜者来谴责。
ISIS thought of them in this way and vowed to destroy them.
ISIS也这样认为，并发誓要摧毁他们。
OK, let's do an experimental thought here.
下面，让我们来做一个思考实验。
I want you to think about your worst sexual experience and recall it in detail.
我想让你们回想一下你最糟糕的性经历，并回顾一下细节。
Now turn to the person to your right and describe that experience.
现在转向你右边的人并描述这个经历。
I know it's difficult, eh? But, of course, I don't expect you to do that.
我知道这很难，对吧？但是，当然，我不希望你们这样做。
You would all be uncomfortable and embarrassed.
你们都会很不舒服，十分尴尬。
And so imagine an 11-year-old girl in the Middle East who was not educated about sexuality,
那么想象一下一个11岁的中东小女孩，没有接受过性教育，
who was taken from her comfort zone, her family, who witnessed the execution of her father and brothers,
从她的舒适区被带离，离开了她的家人，目睹了她父亲和兄弟被处决，
having to describe in detail the rape that she faced in a culture where talking about sexuality is taboo.
不得不详细的描述被强奸的过程，而在她的文化中谈论性是一种禁忌。
Her only way of recovering her honor is to hide the crime, believe she was married against her will,
她恢复自尊的唯一方式是隐瞒那个罪行，去相信她只是违背了自己的意愿嫁了人，
or deny the events out of shame and fear of being rejected.
或者出于羞耻和害怕被拒绝而否认事件。
I interviewed a girl who I will call "Ayda."
我曾面谈过一个女孩，我打算叫她“艾达”。
She was purchased by an ISIS leader, or emir, together with 13 other girls aged between 11 and 18 years old.
她与其他13个年龄在11到18岁之间的女孩一起，被一个ISIS的领导人或称Emir（穆斯林首领）买来。
Amongst the group were her three nieces and two cousins.
这里面有她的三个侄女和两个表姐妹。
The 14 girls were taken to a house full of ISIS fighters.
这14个女孩被带到一个满是ISIS战士的房子。
An imam was present who made it clear that their religion was wrong,
一个Imam（清真寺领拜人）在场，明确的告诉她们她们的宗教是错误的，
and the only good path was to accept Islam and marry a Muslim man.
唯一正确的做法是接受伊斯兰教，并嫁给一个穆斯林男人。
The emir wrote the names of the girls on 14 small pieces of paper.
Emir把女孩们的名字写在了14张小纸片上。
Two ISIS fighters would pick a piece of paper each.
两个ISIS战士会每人抽一张纸。
They would call out the name written on the paper, and those girls were forcibly taken into another room.
他们会叫纸上的名字，然后那些女孩会被强行带到另一个房间。
While the emir and the imam heard the two girls screaming as they were being raped, they began laughing.
Emir和Imam听着女孩们在被强奸时的尖叫声，他们开始笑。
Both were telling the other girls that the two girls should enjoy the experience instead of screaming.
他们告诉其他女孩，那两个女孩应该享受，而不是尖叫。
After a while, the girls were brought back into the room. They were in shock and were bleeding.
过了一会儿，两个女孩被带回了这个房间。她们受到了惊吓，还在流血。
They confirmed that they had been married and suffered a lot of pain.
她们确信了她们已经结婚了，并且遭受了很多痛苦。
It is important to consider the fact that
重要的是要考虑到一个事实，
they had been raised to believe in sexual intercourse with one man in their lifetime: their husband.
她们生来就被教育自己一生只能与一个男人发生性行为：他们的丈夫。
The only connection that they could make in their shocked state is to define their rape as marriage.
在这种惊吓状态下，她们可以建立的唯一连接就是将他们的强奸定义为婚姻。
Before the next two girls were taken to be raped, Ayda made a terrifying decision.
在下一组的女孩被带走强奸前，艾达做了一个可怕的决定。
As the oldest of the group, she convinced the emir to let them use the bathroom in order to wash themselves before marriage.
作为里面最大的女孩，她说服了Emir允许她们在“结婚”前去卫生间清洁自己。
Ayda had been told by one of the girls that she noticed rat poison in the bathroom.
有一个女孩告诉艾达，她看见在卫生间里有老鼠药。
The 14 girls decided to end their suffering by drinking the poison.
这14个女孩决定通过喝毒药结束她们的痛苦。
Before the poison took full effect, they were discovered by ISIS and taken to the hospital, where they survived.
在毒药彻底发挥作用之前，ISIS发现了，并把她们带去了医院，她们活了下来。
ISIS decided to separate the girls and sell them individually.
ISIS决定分开这些女孩，然后单独一个个的卖掉她们。
Ayda was taken to another house and brutally raped after she attempted again to kill herself with her headscarf.
在又一次试图用头巾自杀后，艾达被带去了另一个房子，被残暴的强奸了。
She was beaten and raped every two days.
她每两天就要被打、被强奸。
After four months in captivity, Ayda found the courage to escape.
被囚禁四个月后，艾达鼓起了勇气逃跑。
She never saw the other 13 girls again. I interviewed Ayda multiple times.
她再也没有见到另外13个女孩。我采访了艾达好几次。
She was willing to speak to me because she had heard from other victims
她愿意跟我说话是因为她从其他受害者那听说，
that there was a woman from the UN who understood her complicated culture.
有一个来自联合国的女人可以理解她们复杂的文化。
I looked into her eyes and listened deeply to the stories of her darkest hours.
我看着她的眼睛，认真聆听了她最黑暗的那段故事。
We established a personal connection that continues to this day.
我们建立了个人联系，并一直持续到今天。
My upbringing made it easy for me to understand her extreme sense of shame and her fear of being rejected.
我的成长经历让我很容易理解她的极度羞耻感和害怕被拒绝的恐惧。
These types of investigations are not only about gathering information and evidence, but they're also about victim support.
这些类型的调查不仅是关于收集信息和证据，也包括对受害者的支持。
The bonds I established with the victims strengthens their confidence and willingness to seek justice.
我与受害者们建立的联系增强了她们寻求正义的信心和意愿。
As she considered her escape, Ayda, like all Yazidi survivors, faced a dilemma:
在艾达考虑逃跑的时候，她也像所有雅兹迪幸存者一样，面对两难境地：
Should she continue to suffer the abuse of her captors,
她应该继续忍受囚禁者的折磨，
or would it be better to return home, where she would face shame, rejection and possibly honor killing?
还是回到家，面对耻辱，拒绝和名誉杀人的可能更好？
I know all too well the pain of being rejected by my Moroccan community in Belgium,
我完全了解我在比利时摩洛哥社区被拒绝时候的痛苦，
and I did not want this to happen to the Yazidi community.
而我不想它发生在雅兹迪社区。
So a group of concerned entities, including the UN, NGOs,
所以一组相关人员，包括联合国，非政府组织，
politicians and members of the Yazidi community approached a religious leader, Baba Sheikh.
政客和雅兹迪社区的成员，联系了一位宗教领袖，巴巴·谢赫。
After many meetings, he realized that these girls
在很多次会面后，他意识到这些女孩
had not disrespected their religion by being forcibly converted to Islam and married to ISIS fighters.
没有因为被强迫转入伊斯兰和嫁给ISIS战士就背叛自己的宗教。
Instead, they have been abducted, raped and sexually enslaved.
相反的，她们被囚禁、强奸和当作性奴隶。
I am happy to report that, after our meetings,
在我们的会议后，我很高兴的报告，
Baba Sheikh announced publicly that the survivors should be treated as victims and embraced by the community.
巴巴·谢赫公开宣布这些幸存者应该被当作受害者，受到社区的拥护。
This message was heard throughout the community and eventually reached the survivors being held captive by ISIS.
整个社区都听到了这个消息，而且最终传到了被ISIS囚禁的那些幸存者耳中。
After his declaration of support, the survivors were motivated to escape from ISIS as Ayda has done,
在他宣布后，这些幸存者有了逃离ISIS的动力，就像艾达一样，
and many young Yazidi women took the bold step and returned home to their communities.
还有很多年轻的雅兹迪女性迈出了大胆的一步，回到了她们的家和社区。
Baba Sheikh's public pronouncement saved the lives of many young Yazidi women, both in captivity and after their escape.
巴巴·谢赫的公开声明拯救了许多年轻雅兹迪女性的生命，无论是被囚禁的还是已经逃离的。
Sadly, not all religious leaders agreed to talk with us. Some victims had far worse outcomes than the Yazidis.
不幸的是，不是所有的宗教领袖都同意与我们交谈。一些受害者有着比雅兹迪人更惨痛的结果。
For example, only 43 of the 500-600 victims from the Shia Turkmen community were able to return home after escaping ISIS.
例如，在什叶派土库曼人社区的500-600个受害者中，只有43个人能够在逃离ISIS后回到家。
Some of them were advised by their family to stay with ISIS or commit suicide in order to save the honor of the family.
她们中一些人的家人劝她们留在ISIS那或者自杀来维护家里的名誉。
Germany established a project to support survivors of ISIS
德国发起了一个项目，来支持ISIS的幸存者，
by providing psychosocial support and housing for 1,100 women and children, including Ayda.
为1100名女性和孩子提供社会心理支持和住所，包括艾达。
I visited Ayda several times during my work.
我在工作中去看了艾达几次。
I am so proud of her and the other victims. The progress they have made is remarkable.
我为她和其他受害者感到骄傲。她们的进展显著。
It is really moving to see how many of them, despite their struggles, have benefited from this program.
尽管她们有很多挣扎，但是看见她们中那么多人受益于这个项目，非常令人感动。
The program includes individual and group counseling, art therapy, music therapy,
这个项目包括个人和小组咨询、艺术疗法、音乐疗法、
sport activities, language courses, school and other integration efforts.
体育活动、语言课程、学校和其它一体化的内容。
What I observed was that removing the victims from an area of conflict
我观察到的是，把受害者从冲突区域
to a country at peace had a positive impact on all of them.
转移到一个和平的国家对她们有非常积极的影响。
This project caught the attention of other countries, and they were interested to help more Yazidis.
这个项目引起了其它国家的关注，他们也希望帮助更多的雅兹迪人。
The Yazidi women and girls still call and text me to tell me about their grades at school, fun trips they've taken,
雅兹迪妇女和女孩仍然在给我打电话，发信息告诉我她们在学校的成绩，参加过的有趣的旅行，
or to inform me about their future dreams, like writing a book about what they have faced with ISIS.
或者告诉我她们未来的梦想，像是写一本关于她们面对ISIS的书。
Sometimes they are sad and feel the need to talk again about the events.
有的时候她们很伤心，感到有必要再次谈论这些事件。
I'm not a psychologist, and I have faced secondary PTSD from their horrific stories.
我不是心理学家，她们恐怖的经历让我面临了二级创伤后应激障碍。
But I keep encouraging them to talk, and I keep listening, because I do not want them to feel alone in their suffering.
但是我继续鼓励她们去说，我继续去聆听，因为我不想她们孤独的面对痛苦。
Through these anecdotes, I see a bigger picture emerging.
通过这些故事，我看到了更大的画面出现。
These women and girls are healing. They are no longer afraid to seek justice.
这些妇女和女孩在痊愈。她们不再害怕寻找正义。
Without hope there can be no justice, and without justice there can be no hope.
没有希望就没有正义，没有正义就没有希望。
Every 3rd and 15th of August, it's my remembrance day,
每年8月的3号和15号都是我的纪念日，
and I reach out to the Yazidis to let them know that I'm thinking about them.
我会联系那些雅兹迪人，告诉她们我在想念她们。
They're always happy when I do that. It's an emotional day for them.
她们总是很开心。对她们来说，这是激动人心的一天。
This past August, I spoke with Ayda. She was so happy to announce that
这个8月，我跟艾达聊了天。她很开心的告诉我
one of her nieces who was abducted with her was finally released out of ISIS hands in Syria and returned to Iraq.
跟她一起被囚禁的一个侄女终于在叙利亚从ISIS手中被解救，并且回到了伊拉克。
Can you believe that? After four years?
你们能相信吗？在四年后？
Today, her biggest wish is for her whole family, now located across three continents, to be reunited.
如今，她最大的愿望就是，遍布在三个大陆的家人能够重聚。
And I hope they will. When I think about the survivors I work with,
我希望他们可以。当我想起我工作中的那些幸存者，
I remember the words of an Egyptian doctor, writer and human rights activist, Nawal El Saadawi.
我记得纳瓦尔·萨达维，一位埃及医生，作家，人权活动家说过的话。
In her book, "Woman at Point Zero," she wrote,
在她的书《零点女人》中，她写道：
"Life is very hard, and the only people who really live are those who are harder than life itself."
“生活很艰难，唯一真正生活的人是那些比生活本身还坚强的人。”
These victims have been through unimaginable pain. But with a little help, they show how resilient they are.
这些受害者经历过无法想象的痛苦。但是有了一点帮助，她们展示了自己的韧性。
Each has their own perspective on what kind of justice she seeks,
每个人对于她要寻求什么样的正义都有自己的看法，
and I believe deeply that a credible justice process is key to how she reclaims her dignity and finds closure with her trauma.
而且我深深相信，可靠的司法程序是她们恢复尊严并结束创伤的关键。
Justice is not only about punishing the perpetrator.
正义不只是惩罚肇事者。
It's about victims feeling that crimes committed against them have been recorded and recognized by the rule of law.
也能够让受害者感觉到施加在他们身上的那些罪行已被法治记录和承认。
For me, it has been the experience of a lifetime to work with these survivors.
对于我来说，与这些幸存者一起工作是我这一生难忘的经历。
Because I share their sorrow, their language and their culture, we connect on the deepest human level.
因为我理解她们的悲伤，她们的语言和文化，我们在最深的人性层面连接起来。
This itself is an act of healing: to be heard, to be seen, to be given compassion instead of condemnation.
这件事本身就是治愈行为：被倾听，被看见，被给予同情，而不是谴责。
When we get so close to people in pain, it creates pain for the investigators, too.
当我们如此接近处在痛苦中的人们时，这也会给调查人员带来痛苦。
My work is challenging, heartbreaking and trauma-inducing. But let me tell you why I do it.
我的工作具有挑战性，令人心碎，易引发创伤。但是让我告诉你们我为什么要做。
When I meet the survivors of these mass atrocities, when I hold their hands and look in their eyes,
当我遇见这些大规模暴行的幸存者，当我握住她们的手，看着她们的眼睛，
it does not erase my own pain, but it does make it almost worthwhile. And there's nothing I would rather be doing.
这并不能消除我自己的痛苦，但这让一切都是值得的。我已经别无所求。
When I see these brave survivors struggling to connect again to their own self-worth,
当我看见这些勇敢的幸存者努力重新与自我价值、
to their families, to their place in a society that values them,
家庭和重视他们的社会建立联系时，
it is an honor to bear witness; it is a privilege to seek justice.
可以作为见证人是一种荣幸，能够去寻求正义是一种荣誉。
And that is healing, too -- for all of us. Thank you.
而且这也是一种治愈--对我们所有人都是。谢谢。
