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Do you have trouble making friends?
你交朋友有困难吗？
Unsure how to make others like you?
不确定如何才能让别人喜欢你？
You wanna show others how likable you are, but they have to see what's great about you in subtle ways.
你想向别人展示你有多可爱，但他们必须从微妙的方面看到你的优点。
How will they know you're interested in them?
他们怎么知道你对他们感兴趣呢？
What will make them wanna get to know you more?
是什么让他们想要更多地了解你？
What subtle things make someone start liking you as a person?
是什么微妙的事情让别人开始喜欢你这个人？
Want me to let you in on a secret?
想让我告诉你一个秘密吗？
You have some pretty interesting and great qualities, but others just don't know about them yet.
你有一些非常有趣和美好的品质，但其他人只是还不知道而已。
So to help you with that, here are six tips to make others like you.
因此，为了帮助你做到这一点，这里有六个让别人喜欢你的小贴士。
Number one, ask questions to show your interest.
第一，问一些问题来表示你的兴趣。
Do you forget to ask follow-up questions to whom you're speaking with?
你忘了问跟你说话的人的后续问题了吗？
You're in a deep discussion and you're definitely interested in what they have to say, but how can they know you are?
你正在进行深入的讨论，你肯定对他们要说的话感兴趣，但他们怎么知道你感兴趣呢？
Social psychologist and professor at James Madison University, Natalie Kerr, wrote in a Psychology Today article that research shows that people who ask more questions during conversations are perceived as more responsive and are better liked by conversation partners.
社会心理学家、詹姆斯·麦迪逊大学教授娜塔莉·克尔在《今日心理学》的一篇文章中写道，研究表明，在谈话中问更多问题的人被认为反应更灵敏，更容易受到谈话伙伴的喜欢。
A good point indeed.
这确实是一个很好的观点。
Wouldn't you get the impression that your friend is actually interested in your story if they asked to hear more?
如果你的朋友要求倾听更多的故事，你会不会觉得他们实际上对你的故事很感兴趣？
The next trick is to actually actively listen to them and ask follow-up questions when you're curious about something.
下一个诀窍是当你对某事感到好奇时，积极地倾听他们的意见，并问他们后续的问题。
Number two, show you're trustworthy and keep your promises.
第二，表明你是值得信赖的，信守承诺。
Are you trustworthy?
你值得信赖吗？
Do you keep your promises big and small?
你信守大大小小的诺言吗？
According to research, trustworthiness is very important to others when it comes to relationships.
研究表明，在人际关系中，可信度对其他人来说非常重要。
A 2007 research study from researchers at the University of Singapore, Arizona State University, and the University of Florida found that trustworthiness was an extremely important value in relationships for people.
新加坡大学、亚利桑那州立大学和佛罗里达大学的研究人员在2007年进行的一项研究发现，在人际关系中，可信度是一项极其重要的价值。
The study states, "Across different measures of trait importance and different groups and relationships, trustworthiness was considered extremely important for all interdependent others."
该研究指出，“在不同的特质重要性衡量标准以及不同的群体和关系中，可信度被认为对所有相互依赖的人们来说都是极其重要的。
So next time you make a promise, it's a good idea to keep it.
所以下次你许下诺言的时候，最好信守诺言。
It will show others you're trustworthy and they may just like you more for that too.
这会让别人知道你值得信赖，他们可能也会因此而更喜欢你。
Number three, give genuine compliments.
第三，给予真诚的赞美。
When you think of something nice about someone, do you often let them know?
当你想到某人的优点时，你经常会让他们知道吗？
Do you compliment others when you get the chance?
当你有机会的时候，你会称赞别人吗？
It may just make someone's day.
这可能会让他们一天都很开心。
The reward theory of attraction is a good example of how others may start to like you more when you make them feel better.
吸引力的回报理论是一个很好的例子，说明当你让别人感觉更好时，他们可能会开始更喜欢你。
The theory states that people will like those who they associate rewarding events with.
该理论指出，人们会喜欢那些与他们联系在一起的有奖励事件的人。
Or if your behavior makes them feel rewarded, then they'll like you more for it.
或者，如果你的行为让他们感到有回报，那么他们会更喜欢你。
If you're often in a good mood and in turn make them feel better, that's a reward.
如果你经常心情好，反过来又能让他们感觉好一些，那就是奖励。
If you don't shy away from complimenting them when they've done something kind, that's a reward.
当他们做了好事时，如果你不羞于赞美他们，那就是奖励。
They'll simply feel better being around you.
和你在一起，他们会感觉更好。
Number four, let them know you exist and be around them more often.
第四，让他们知道你的存在，多跟他们在一起。
Do you want someone to like you?
你想让别人喜欢你吗？
Well, they first need to know you exist.
他们首先需要知道你的存在。
According to the mere-exposure effect, the more we're repeatedly exposed to something, the more familiar we become with it and people will start to prefer the very thing they're more familiar with.
根据接触效应，我们重复接触某样东西的次数越多，我们对它就越熟悉，人们就会开始喜欢他们更熟悉的东西。
So make yourself be heard and seen.
所以，让你自己被听到并被看到。
Stay around for those coffee conversations during lunch break, invite some people out to an event you're going to, let people develop familiarity with you.
在午休时留下来喝杯咖啡，邀请一些人出去参加你要参加的活动，让人们对你变得熟悉。
Number five, befriend their friends.
第五，和他们的朋友交朋友。
If you have a shared friend, you already have something in common, and perhaps an easier way to get to know someone.
如果你有一个共同的朋友，你已经有了一些共同点，也许是了解一个人的更容易的方式。
This is similar to the triadic closure.
这类似于三元闭包的概念。
If there are connections A to B and B to C, then there is a likelihood of the connection from A to C to be created as well.
如果存在A到B和B到C的连接，那么也有可能创建从A到C的连接。
So if you really wanna be friends with someone and realize you know someone they're friends with, let them know.
所以，如果你真的想和某人做朋友，并且意识到你认识他们的朋友，就告诉他们。
You'll not only have something simple to both relate to, but you may also have a better chance of becoming friends with that person as well.
你不仅会有一些简单的关系，而且你也有更好的机会和那个人成为朋友。
And number six, let them know you like them or enjoy their company.
第六，让他们知道你喜欢他们或享受他们的陪伴。
How often do you let others know you like them?
你多久让别人知道你喜欢他们一次？
People have an easier time liking someone who likes them back.
人们更容易喜欢喜欢他们的人。
So let them know you appreciate them.
所以，让他们知道你很欣赏他们。
Let them know you enjoy their company or give them a hug or a wave when you see them next.
下次见到他们时，让他们知道你喜欢和他们在一起，或者给他们一个拥抱、向他们挥挥手。
They'll have an easier time liking someone who they know genuinely appreciates and likes them back.
他们会更容易喜欢那些他们知道真心欣赏和喜欢他们的人。
Wouldn't you wanna know if they liked you?
你难道不想知道他们是否喜欢你吗？
So which tips will you use when making new friends?
那么，在结交新朋友时，你会使用哪些小贴士呢？
How will you let others know you appreciate them?
你将如何让别人知道你欣赏他们？
Will you give out genuine compliments when you think of them?
当你想到他们时，你会给予真诚的赞扬吗？
Let us know in the comments below.
在下面的评论中告诉我们。
We hope you enjoyed this video.
我们希望你喜欢这个视频。
And if you did, don't forget to click the like button and share it with a friend.
如果你确实喜欢，别忘了点赞，并与朋友分享。
Subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification bell for more content like this.
订阅Psych2Go，点击通知铃，就能看到更多这样的内容。
As always, thanks for watching.
一如既往，感谢您的观看。
