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According to Smith, any sort of non-reproductive sexual behavior hashistorically been seen as perverse. These days, though, many people are okaywith sex that isn't reproductive. We're less okay with emotional attachmentsthat aren't socially productive, and so it seems the distaste is strongest forthe small subset of men who consider themselves to be in romantic relationshipswith their dolls, rather than just using them for sex. We expect a relationshipto involve mutual consent, a kind of equality and reciprocity that isimpossible with a doll. By its very nature, the relationship is one-sided—ateeter-totter with only one person sitting on it.
据史密斯说，历史上任何不以传宗接代为目的的滚床单都被认为是邪恶的。近年来，很多不生孩子的人也很性福。跟缺少情感的替代品（玩偶）在一起不是有效的社交行为，更令人强烈厌恶地的是他们认为同玩偶是种很浪漫的关系，而不仅仅只是性行为。但我们期待的双方认可互惠平等的关系，是不可能在玩偶身上得到的。由于这种本质，这段像跷跷板样平衡呃关系就只有一个人坐在一边。
But realistic dolls often do inspire real affection, and even devotion. Somemen assign personalities and preferences to the dolls they design (Davecat'sdolls even have Twitter accounts), and they talk about them as one would a livepartner. "There is genuine empathy here,” Smith writes, "what the Germans callEinfurlung, an entering into the feelings of an other."
但现实中玩偶也激发了真正的情感，甚至忠诚。一些人设计的娃娃还设定了个性和喜好（戴维猫的玩偶有推特。）他们像生活伴侣一样谈论她。“这是最典型的移情心理，”史密斯写道“德国人称之为Einfurlung（大约好像是恋物癖这类意思），进入了另外一种感情。”
A love for one's own creation, though, is also, in a way, self-love, ornarcissism. "This is why so much of it has to do with masturbation," Smithsays. "These things are not unconnected."
虽然，个体用这种爱自己或者说自恋的方式创造了爱。“这也是为什么那么多人手淫，”史密斯说“这些事物之间并未没有关联。”
Narcissistic or not, that attachment can become isolating. Smithpoints out that, especially in the age of technology, intimate relationshipswith objects aren't so uncommon. "Think about the way you use your iPhone," hesays. "You hold it, and you stroke it, and you scroll. You're holding it toyour ear as we speak. It's kind of a part of you. It's an extension of you." But things are different when the object is human-shaped and the relationshipis sexual. Owning a doll can have "social and psychological consequences formen who want to develop these intimate and erotic relationships with aninanimate human form. I don't want to pathologize anyone, but I think there's adanger around the way that processes like that objectify men's relationshipswith themselves in a way that restricts an authentic emotional intelligence."
不管是不是自恋行为，替代品（玩偶）都会让人变得更加孤僻。史密斯强调，尤其是在科技时代，同物体的亲密关系很常见。“想想你用‘爱疯'的方式，”他说，“你拿着它，抚摸它，来回翻转。当我们说话时你拿它贴着耳朵，就好像它是你的一部分，是你的身体的延生。”而跟人形物体滚床单则是不同的一件事。玩偶拥有者“同无生命人形物品发展出的这段亲密而色情的关系中，社交和心理占据重要地位的需求得到了满足。我不想说谁病态，但这确实很危险，男人们用他自己想要的方式来物体化一段关系，这制约了真正的情感发展。”
Sarah Valverde, a researcher and mental health therapist, did her mastersthesis in psychology on the demographics and psychological characteristics ofsex doll owners. She says that many of the men she surveyed for her researchfelt shame or embarrassment about owning sex dolls. But contrary to popularstereotypes, they were just as satisfied with their lives, on average, as thegeneral population, and didn't suffer higher-than-normal rates of depression orother mental illness. Owning a sex doll "is certainly a deviant sexual behaviorfrom our norm," she says. "But unless it's all-consuming and it impacts otherareas of life, we really can't define it as a disorder."
SarahValverde研究员和心理健康专家 ，她的硕士论文是关于玩偶拥有者心理特性的。她说她研究调查很多略显害羞尴尬的娃娃拥有者，与传统观点相反，他们对生活满意的满程度与普通人持平，没有遭受过抑郁症或其他精神疾病的苦难折磨。拥有一个性爱娃娃“无疑阻止了我们的出轨行为”她说，“除非它到处出现并影响到其它方面，不然我们真不应该定义它为障碍。”
