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Do, do, do, Wheel of Opinions. Yeah! Now, here's how it works.
啦啦啦，转起观点的车轮，来看看游戏规则。
You're gonna hit this button right here, which activates the opinion topic generator,
你要按下这个按钮，它将启动观点话题器，
and it'll land on a random topic. Whatever it is,
之后它将随意挑选话题，不管是什么话题，
I have a feeling you are going to have a good opinion about it.
你要对这个话题说出你的观点。
All right. Are you ready for this? Yes. All right, press the button when you're ready. Here we go.
好的，准备好了吗，好了，请准备好按按钮，来了。
Watch, you'll see. It'll pop up. Technology, watch. I'll do it.
看着这个，看这个时钟，它会自动跳出来，我来吧。
Oh, we almost had spanx, but all right. It was almost spanx. You know what I mean? Yeah,
差一点就是斯潘克，但是还好，
Do you like spanx? Well... No? I got stuff to say about spanx, I mean, Spanx.
你喜欢斯潘克吗？不喜欢？关于它我其实有点要说的，我说的是斯潘克。
Anyways, online dating. No. Online dating, man, I don't like it,
好吧线上相亲，线上相亲，我不喜欢，
cause I feel like that's where I meet a lot of creeps...
因为我在这上面遇到了许多怪人，
dudes that come off like they have, like, the really nice picture
从照片上看一个个很帅，
and you're like, Oh, I can't wait to meet him, and then you go to the Starbucks to meet him,
你会觉得我有点等不急要见他们，之后你去了星巴克约会，
and you're like Oh, my God, he is a booger wolf and...
然后你说老天，他就是个可怕的狼。
Okay, that's good. All right, we're ready for... No, I wasn't finished!
太棒了，我们准备下一个，我还没说完。
His breath smell like he's been eating eggs for days. All right, hey, come on.
他口臭得像吃了好几天鸡蛋，好了，下一个。
No, I ain't finished yet! His beard is ashy! He got an ashy beard. No, I ain't finished yet.
我还没完，他的胡子布满了灰尘，他长着灰尘般的胡子，我还没完。
He tells you he's got good credit, and then you figure out his birth date and look it up,
他说他的信誉很好，之后你了解了他的出生日期，上网一查，
and you find out he's got a credit score of 200.
发现他的信誉评级只有200。
I ain't finished yet. No! I ain't finished is a new character.
我还没说完，别说了，没说完是你的另一个特征。
I ain't finished is a new character. All right, let's go to the next one, ready?
没说完是你的另一个特征，好吧看看下一个。
I ain't finished is a new character. Popcorn, what?
没说完是你的另一个特征，爆米花，什么？
Those strawberry candies with the soft center that grandmas always have.
祖母经常吃的软心草莓糖。
You know those things. Oh, those strawberry candies, those strawberry,
你知道的，这些草莓糖，
them cheap strawberry candies that grandma's always have. They try to give them to you in church,
这些老奶奶们喜欢的廉价草莓糖，她们特别喜欢在教堂给你这些糖，
when you're like, a little colicky, they're like, Hey, take this candy right here.
你会感到隐隐作痛，她们会说拿些糖吧。
And the candy's nasty cause it's old, and it seems like always the kids,
这些糖太难吃了，因为它们很旧，好像只有小孩子，
it's shaped like a little strawberry, so you think, Oh, it's gonna be delicious like a strawberry,
这些糖的形状像草莓，所以你认为一定会和草莓一样好吃，
but it tastes like plastic and sugar. And then it's always in,
但吃起来像塑料和白糖，你总会在...
You know I be raiding kids' Halloween trick-or-treat candies, Yeah.
尤其是在万圣节，我会突袭孩子们的糖果，没错。
And they always be in there, and that's how I know they went to a geriatric's home to get candy.
这些糖果绝对在里面，我就知道他们是在老年公寓里拿的糖果。
And it makes your breath stink! Them candies make your breath smell like you've been eating eggs for three days.
它让我口臭，这些糖让我口臭，就像吃了好几天的鸡蛋。
Oh, hey! I'm not finished! And another thing! I ain't finished yet, and another thing!
好了，我还没完，我还没完！
All right, ready, here we go, one more. The woods? Oh, no. The woods?
好了最后一个，森林？不会吧！
Now, the woods can be a wonderful thing, and it can be a scary thing.
森林是美好的事物，但也很恐怖。
Now, personally for me, if I go to the woods it better have a toilet.
尤其是对于我，如果我去森林，它最好有个厕所。
Also, it better have a place where I can wash my ass. All right, hey!
也要有一个我可以洗漱的地方，好了。
Now, what I like most about the woods is you can get freaky in the woods,
你知道我喜欢森林哪里，因为在森林我会感到怪异，
but I be scared at the same times because what if Jason in the woods?
但同样很害怕，前提是詹森在森林里。
You know what I'm saying? Them scary movies, they always be getting killed in the woods.
你懂得的，在惊悚电影画面中，人们都是在森林被杀害的。
Yeah. But I go to the woods, though. Englewood! Oh, Englewood. Oh, my God.
没错，但我还是喜欢去森林，因为那是恩格尔伍德，恩格尔伍德老天。
That's all the time we have for Wheel of Opinions.
这就是今天的转起观点的车轮！
My thanks to Tiffany Haddish. Who are you? Who are you, man? I'm Tiffany Haddish. We'll be right back...
谢谢蒂凡尼·哈迪斯，你好吗，我是蒂凡尼·哈迪斯，马上回来。
