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That's a long walk. I feel like we have to practice with that.
这段路好长。我觉得走路这段都需要排练。
So, first off, what an honor, what a privilege to be on this stage, getting to have this conversation with you all.
首先，我很荣幸能站在台上跟大家有这样的对话。
The truth is that I've spent the past three years in college locker rooms,
实际上，过去三年我一直会在大学的更衣室里，
having conversations with young men about the importance of respecting women.
跟一些年轻男生讨论尊重女性的重要性。
I was recently invited to a major university, and as I was being "debriefed" on the way in,
我最近有被邀请去一所有名的大学，在路上他们向我了解情况，
they were telling me what was going on specific to their locker room.
他们同时也告诉了我更衣室里具体发生了什么。
I was informed that there was one player who had punched his baby mama;
我了解到其中一个队员打了自己的养母；
that there were four other players that were facing rape allegations with four separate women;
另外4个队员因强奸了4位女孩而正面临着起诉；
that there were another two players who had filmed and watched one of the rapes of an unconscious girl;
还有两个队员拍摄并观看了一名昏迷女孩被强奸；
and knowing all of this, one of the head coaches came in the day after the election,
了解到这些之后，其中一个主教练在大选结束那天走进来，
and he started the chant, "We can grab women by the pussy because this is America."
开始呼喊：“我们可以随便去摸女人的阴部，因为这儿是美国。”
Well, that is not the America that I know, and the truth is that sexual assault is but a symptom of the problem.
这可不是我知道的美国，实际上性骚扰正是我们讨论的问题的一个特征。
The problem is the mindset of how these young men are being programmed to think about, to talk about, and to treat women.
这个问题就是这些年轻人受到的教育，教育他们怎样思考，怎样说话，以及怎样对待女性。
Before I dive into the whole talk, I feel like I have to preface a few disclaimers.
在开始演讲之前，我想说几件事。
Number one: I'm going to mess up.
一、我这场演讲肯定会搞砸。
I just accepted that that's going to happen.
我接受这个事实。
I'm probably going to blank out at some point, so please be gentle with me.
我可能有时候会卡壳，所以请大家多多包涵。
On top of it, there are brilliant people who have dedicated their entire lives to this conversation,
首先，有些前辈已经把自己的一生都奉献给了这个事业，
and institutions who have paved the way, so I am but offering my humble two cents.
很多机构在为这件事开路，所以我也只是在贡献自己微薄的力量。
Number two: ProtectHer is but a starting place for us.
二、女性保护活动只是一个开始。
We recognize that men are also sexually assaulted, one in 16.
我们知道男性也会面临性骚扰，我知道的一个只有16岁。
We know that the LGBT community is also assaulted, and while those communities absolutely deserve our attention,
我们知道LGBT群体也会面临性骚扰，他们也需要我们的关注，
for the sake of this conversation, I am going to be speaking about "her,"
就这场演讲而言，我只谈女性保护，
because violence against women is a house on fire, and I will be speaking in heterosexual stereotypes.
因为针对女性的暴力就像一座正在燃烧的房子，我会站在异性恋者的角度开始。
Number three: ProtectHer is not implying that women are weak and that we can't protect ourselves,
三、女性保护并不是暗示女性处于弱势，我们无法保护自己
so we need men to come and help protect us.
所以才需要男性来保护我们。
ProtectHer is an invitation for all of humanity to better prioritize the women and girls.
女性保护活动是在邀请全人类一起保护所有妇女和女孩。
Now, what's interesting is that some schools call me because, you know,
很有意思的一件事是，有些学校邀请我是因为，你们知道的，
at the end of the day, they care about what's going on in their locker rooms.
学校很关心更衣室里到底发生了什么。
But before I ever started in locker rooms, I worked in girl empowerment for a decade.
但在我开始更衣室活动之前，我在一个女性赋权机构里工作了10年。
When I was 19 years old, I founded a nonprofit called I AM THAT GIRL.
我19岁的时候成立了一个非盈利组织，叫做“我就是那个女孩”。
We're basically a bad-ass version of scout girls for college girls.
对很多女大学生来说，我们基本上就是情况更恶劣的版本的女童子军。
We have about a million girls involved now, and we just opened up a chapter in our 20th country.
现在差不多有100万女生加入了我们，我们才刚在20世纪揭开新的一页。
So the truth is -- thank you, man! I dig that!
所以事实上--谢谢你先生！我很喜欢！
So, the truth is that I have a name, and a face, and a story for every time someone talks about girls in statistic form.
所以说起不同的女孩，我心里都有那么一个名字，一张脸，和一个对应的故事。
And it wasn't until three years ago that Yogi Roth and Trent Dilfer called me,
直到三年前，优基·罗斯和特伦特·迪尔佛给我打电话，
and they asked me to come and give a talk to the top 18 high school quarterbacks for a TV show called "Elite Eleven."
邀请我上一个叫《精英11人》的电视节目，去给全国排名前18的高中四分卫演讲。
What I didn't realize was that when it aired on ESPN, a week later, everything with Ray Rice would come out.
我在ESPN直播时没有意识到，一周后，雷·赖斯的事情会曝出来。
And suddenly, I was that girl in the locker room,
突然，我就成为了更衣室里的那个女孩，
having tough love conversations with men about the importance of respecting women.
艰难的跟男生聊着尊重女性的重要性这样的话题。
It probably helped that I worked at FOX Sports and ESPN,
可能我在福克斯体育频道和ESPN的工作经历起了作用，
and that I grew up in Texas where football is a religion, that I grew up with four older brothers.
也可能是因为我在德克萨斯州跟四个哥哥一起长大，在那里橄榄球就是信仰。
My father's the very best man that I know, my husband was a professional athlete for nine years.
我的父亲很擅长橄榄球，我的丈夫也做了九年的职业运动员。
What's interesting is all of a sudden being hired by division one schools all over the country,
有趣的是我突然就接到了全国各地一级学校的邀请，
that I was invited behind the velvet curtain to better understand what was going on with them.
去呆在天鹅绒帘后去听他们自己的故事。
Like I said, some schools were hiring me because they had an incident going on in their locker rooms,
就想前面说的，有些学校邀请我是因为他们的更衣室里发生过一些事情，
and other schools were just legitimately concerned, and I had one head coach call me,
还有一些只是很关心这方面的教育，还有一位给我打电话，
and he said he was worried because he had a daughter,
他说他很担心，因为他自己有一个女儿，
and the way in which these young men were talking about women, that was so disrespectful.
而这些年轻的男孩子谈论女性的方式非常不尊重。
Sure enough, I fly out and I am sitting there, and halfway through my talk
于是我飞过去，跟他们坐下来聊天，聊到中间，
we're sitting in a circle in the locker, you can imagine, the only girl
我们是围成一个圈坐的，可以想象下我是里面唯一一个女生，
and halfway through my talk, one of the guys raises his hand and he says:
聊到一半，其中一个人举起了手说：
"You know, I get it, it's important to 'respect' chicks, but it's cool to fuck chicks."
“我明白你的意思了，尊重女性很重要，但是和女孩儿性交很酷。”
You can imagine, the coach is like, "You gotta be kidding me."
可以设想下那个教练满脸都写着“你开什么玩笑”。
He is sitting there, shaking his head, looking down at the ground.
他就坐在那儿，摇头，看着地面。
And so, I look up at this kid, and I said, "Okay, says who?"
于是我看着这个孩子，说：“好吧，谁说的这句话？”
There is this long pause, and immediately he is looking at his boys left and right who are equally mortified,
中间是一段漫长的沉默，然后他突然开始看左右同样觉得害臊的同伴，
staring down at the ground like, "You gotta be kidding me. We're for sure running sprints now."
他们也都看着地板，一副“你开什么什么玩笑。我恨不得马上离开这儿”的样子。
And so, after a minute of awkward silence goes by, I look up and I say,
然后几分钟尴尬的沉默过后，我抬头跟他说，
"Here is the thing, I am not necessarily disagreeing, I'm just saying you made a really opinionated statement
“是这样的。我并不是在表达不同意，我只是说你刚才的这句话非常武断，
you said, 'It's cool to fuck girls,' I'm just saying, 'Says who?'"
你说'和女孩儿性交很酷'，我只是问你'这句话是谁说的？'”
And finally, he looks up at me and he says, "I don't know."
最后，他抬头看着我说：“我不知道。”
And I said, "Yeah, that's the problem: you're on autopilot and you've been programmed to think that way;
我说：“对，这就是问题所在：你相信这个观点并坚持这样的思维方式；
you were handed a script; someone gave you a definition of cool that's not even yours,
就像有人给你一张纸；上面写着酷的定义，但这不是你自己给出的定义，
and you have the audacity to pawn it off as though you're being original."
你在推广这个定义，就好像这是你自己的想法一样。”
Mother, father, preacher, teacher, I'm not here to tell you how to live your life,
母亲、父亲、牧师或是老师，我不是来告诉你应该怎样过这一生。
I am simply inviting you to be brave enough to author your own life,
我只是请你勇敢一点来主宰自己的人生，
to come up with your own definitions, and to think for yourself.
提出自己的看法，自己去思考。
He came up to me after the talk, and he gave me a really awkward hug,
谈话结束后他来找我，很尴尬的跟我拥抱了一下，
and he said, "Thank you," and I looked at him, and I said, "For what?"
说：“谢谢你”，我看着他问：“谢我什么？”
And he said, "No one has ever asked me to think for myself. I want to thank you for the invitation."
他说：“从来没有人告诉我要独立思考。我想谢谢你的邀请。”
Now, I have a thousand stories of adventures, being the only girl in the locker room.
现在我有成千上万个这样的故事，故事里我都是更衣室里唯一的女性。
I have stories that would make you laugh, and make you cry, and they would make you cringe, and they would break your heart.
我知道的故事有的让你笑，有的让你哭，有的让你害怕，有的让你心碎。
But more than anything else, they would leave you hopeful.
但更多的是让你觉得充满希望。
You see, I was put on the planet to empower women.
我来这个世界就是为了给女性权利。
I was made known of that at a really young age,
所以我才在很小的时候就知道这一切，
but it wasn't until I stood in a room full of alpha dudes that I realized that I'd been missing the point, only preaching to half the sky.
但直到我站到一间充满雄性荷尔蒙的更衣室，我才意识到我一直都弄错了重点，我只是在给一半的人说教。
That violence against women is not a women's issue, although we are incredibly capable creatures.
针对女性的暴力不仅仅是女性面临的问题，尽管我们有能力保护自己。
Violence against women is a human issue, and it requires all of us participating.
针对女性的暴力是全人类的问题，需要我们所有人参与进来。
And the truth is, the majority of these young men feel that they have never been invited to sit at our table.
实际上，这些年轻男性中的大部分人，从来没有人邀请他们来跟我们坐在一起。
And because I'm not Santa, and I can't fly to every single school
我不是圣诞老人，我没办法飞到每个学校，
although Lord knows I have tried, I have spent 220 days a year on the road for the past three years.
虽然我的确尝试过，过去三年我每年有220天是花在路上。
So, we created the first ever ProtectHer program, that can be integrated into college locker rooms,
所以我们创立了第一个保护女性项目，它将和大学更衣室结合起来，
to invite young men to broaden their definition of manhood.
邀请年轻男性拓宽他们对于男子气概的定义。
Because we believe that in order to protect the dorm rooms, that we have to activate the hearts and the minds of the locker rooms.
因为我们相信，为了维持宿舍和谐，我们就必须激活更衣室的心灵和思想。
A few things that I have learned being in the trenches with these guys is first and foremost,
在这些谈话中我意识到了一些事情，首先并且最重要的是，
we have to make them aware of their programming.
我们必须让他们意识到自己在被灌输一些概念。
We have to get the most distracted generation in history to pause long enough to be introspective, to ask the hard questions: "Says who?"
我们必须让这历史上最容易精神不集中的一代人，思考足够久的时间来反省自身，来问出这个艰难的问题：“这句话是谁说的？”
We know that they consume ten hours of media a day.
我们知道他们一天会在社交媒体上花10个小时。
Media that glorifies violence against women, that's inherently disrespectful, that's hyper sexualizing and objectifying.
这些社交媒体鼓吹对女性的暴力，它从一开始就充满了不尊重、性别化和对象化。
We know that they consume 3,000 brand images every day,
我们还知道，他们每天要从3000多个品牌形象中获取信息，
spoon-feeding them a definition of manhood that's been hijacked by a cheap Cologne-wearing Ken doll,
这些东西给他们灌输的男子气概的定义就是一个喷着廉价古龙水的肯娃娃。
lacking a moral constitution, self-respect, and authentic confidence.
没有道德观念，没有自尊，没有真正的自信。
We know that the majority of these young men learn about sex through porn.
我们还知道现在大部分的年轻男性对性的了解来自于黄片。
So, maybe we can stop being so shocked because they're doing exactly what we, as a society, are programming them to do, and they're doing it very well.
所以，当看见他们把社会希望他们去做的一一践行，还践行的这么好时，我们完全没必要惊讶。
So maybe, as a society, we can better educate them on sex and healthy relationships.
所以社会应该用更好的方式交给他们性的观念和健康的两性关系概念。
We need to have a conversation about identity.
我们要谈谈人的特质。
We have to broaden their definition of manhood
我们要拓宽他们对于男子气概的认知，
because the consensus in the locker room, right now, is very easy and pretty achievable.
因为目前更衣室里人们的核心认知是非常容易达到的。
It's be as rich as you can, be as famous as you can, and bang as many girls as you can.
那就是赚最多的钱，成最响的名，还有上最多的女孩。
Now, it's interesting, because my husband had a brilliant idea, he said, "What we have to do"
有件事很有趣，我丈夫有个很好的主意，他说“我们要做的”
and my husband is here, he is a 6'9" poster boy of feminism.
我丈夫就在那，他高6尺9，依然支持女性主义。
And his brilliant suggestion was, "We have to get these young men to stop viewing women just as sexual objects,
他的建议就是，“我们要让这些男孩不再把女性仅仅当作是性爱工具，
but to remind them that women are human beings, too."
要让他们意识到女性也是人。”
He said, "So honestly, if I were you, I would just pull pictures of their girlfriends, and sisters, and moms from social media.
他说：“所以如果我是你，我会从社交媒体上找到他们女朋友、姐妹还有母亲的照片。
I'd put it in your presentation."
放在演讲荧幕上。”
That's my husband voice, by the way.
顺便说下，我刚是在模仿他的声音。
It was this brilliant idea. So, for the first talk that I ever gave for Elite Eleven,
这个主意非常好。于是在《精英11人》进行的第一次谈话中，
I pulled pictures of all the women that they love, and I put up a slide,
我把他们爱的女人们的照片找出来，放了一张幻灯片，
and it says, "One in four girls will be sexually assaulted on a college campus."
上面写着：“大学里四分之一的女孩会面临性骚扰。”
And of course, their eyes glazed over, like, "Here we go, we're going to have this conversation."
当然，他们一眼扫过去，就露出那种“看吧，又是这种演讲”的表情。
Then I click the next slide, and I said, "But it's different when it's her."
然后我点击了下一张说：“但如果把主人公换成她们那就不一样了。”
And I memorized ten to fifteen names, I said, "It's different when it's Sarah, and when it's Lauren, and when it's Jenny."
我记住了10到15个名字，我说：“如果主人公是萨拉，是劳伦，是珍妮的时候，那就不一样了。”
And now these guys are looking at their 16-year-old sister. Half the guys in the room started crying.
现在这些人才看着他们16岁的妹妹。房间里一半的人开始哭。
We have to reframe this issue to make this extremely personal to them.
我们要把这个问题变成他们的个人问题。
Number three, we have to have a conversation about respect.
三、我们必须要进行一场主题为尊重的对话。
You can't give something that you don't have.
你无法把自己没有的东西交给别人。
We have to imbue these young men with more self-respect, so that they're able to treat others with more dignity.
我们要教给这些年轻人尊重自己的概念，这样他们才能给别人以尊重。
What dawned on me was that we are not teaching enough emotional education in school right now,
我渐渐明白现在学校并没有给学生足够多的情绪方面的教学，
we are certainly not teaching these young men how to create an authentic confidence,
我们完全没有教给这些年轻人如何建立真正的自信，
so they are sourcing it from exactly where they know how.
于是他们就自己从别的地方学。
Through performance, through popularity, and through possessions.
他们学会从成绩、受欢迎程度和财产上获得自信。
We have to broaden a definition of confidence that is not contingent on social media highlight reels and external validation.
我们应该让他们明白，自信不是来自于社交媒体上的精彩瞬间集锦和外界的认可。
Number four: We have to have real talk with these guys.
四、我们应该跟他们进行真正的对话。
I have yet to come into a locker room where they use words like "consent" and "bystander."
我还没有走进过一个有人用“同意”和“旁观者”这样的词汇的更衣室。
Those are words that we use, in our shiny star studded PSAs.
我们用的这些词汇，都是出于公益广告中的明星。
I have yet to hear of a guy come in, and raise his hand,
我还没见过有人走进来，举手，
and be like, "There's this really great opportunity for us, bystanders, to intervene."
说：“这是一个很好的、让我们旁观者可以干涉的机会。”
I have never heard of a guy be like, "We were in the middle of hooking up, I'm not gonna lie, I paused,
我也没见过有人这样说：“我们做爱正做到一半，真的，我停下来，
I was like, 'I just wanna make sure that I officially have your consent moving forward.'"
问她，'我就是想正式征求下你的意见，你是否同意我继续做下去。'”
That's not me poking fun at the intention behind these words.
我没有取笑这些词引申含义的意思。
That's just we have to give them real language and real tools for the moments that we are asking them to be brave.
只是我们应该用他们可以理解的语言来教他们学会勇敢。
We have to work with them, and be in conversation with them,
我们应该跟他们一起，跟他们交流，
to offer them language when they see something sketchy, being able to say, "Yo, we don't do that."
教给他们那些词汇，好让他们在面对不好的行为时说：“我不会那么做。”
That in the middle of hooking up, to give them language like, "Yo, I just wanna make sure that you're cool with us having sex."
做爱一半时，要让他们学会问：“我就是想知道你和我们做爱是不是很爽。”
Because as long as we're talking to them like academic robots, I think we're setting them up to fail.
因为如果我们像只会照本宣科的机器人那样教，只会得到失败的结果。
And as far as a few calls to action, anyone in media,
还有一些我号召大家一起做的事，每个用社交软件的人，
please stop crucifying coaches and universities when this stuff happens in their locker room;
如果别人学校的更衣室里发生了类似的事，请不要过分攻击学校和老师，
we're at pandemic levels, this is happening everywhere.
大家其实都一样，这样的事情在任何地方都会发生。
Instead, just celebrate the universities who are doing it right, so that we can inspire others to follow suit.
我们应该做的是表扬那些做的好的学校，从而鼓励更多学校向他们学习。
For coaches and educators, please invest in programs like these, that are preventative medicine,
从校长到老师，请推广我们这样的项目，因为这些就是预防针，
we cannot continue to triage these symptoms, putting band-aids on bullet wounds.
我们无法给这些现象分类，用创可贴治枪伤。
For parents out there, you hold all the power in your wallets.
对于家长，请捂紧你的口袋。
Demand that, in order for you to pay tuition, these schools have to invest in the safety of both your daughters and your sons.
为了让你花更多的钱在教育上，这些学校才会愿意投资保障你们女儿和儿子的安全。
For students out there, ask your administration to invest in these kinds of programs.
对于学生，请让学生管理机构投资类似项目。
And for student athletes out there, say that you are not going to sign with any university that isn't making prevention a priority.
对于学生运动员群体，请告诉他们你不会跟任何一个不把预防问题发生放在优先位置的机构签合同。
For policy makers out there, if you have to have a driver's license to drive a car,
对于政策制定者，如果你必须拥有驾照才能开车，
why would you not have to take a mandatory sexual assault prevention program, in order to attend a college or play sports?
为了让学生好好上学或参加运动，为什么不建立一个性骚扰预防体系呢？
For the National League team owners, would you be so audacious as to sign a ProtectHer pledge
对于全国棒球联盟各队的老板，请签署女性保护的承诺书，
that says that you won't draft any students who have sexual assault convictions.
保证绝不聘用任何一个有性骚扰记录的人。
To be a professional athlete is a privilege, it's a real-life superhero in this country,
职业运动员是很光荣的，是这个国家现实生活中的超级英雄，
and you literally have the ability to change the entire game with those kinds of standards.
你们有利用这些规则来改变整个运动的能力。
Lastly, ProtectHer is a battle cry, it's a belief system,
最后，保护女性是一句口号，是一个信仰体系，
it is a cultural identity that is rooted in the inherent respect for women.
是植根于对女性尊重之中的文化认同。
Right now, as we sit in this auditorium,
就在此刻，我们坐在这个大厅的时候，
we have women and bad-ass men all over the country, marching, standing at their capital, saying that this is the shift...
外面还有很多女性，还有很多坏人在游走，他们手握着资本说这就是变革的时刻，
saying that this is the shift that our country wants to make, and it's easy for us to sit in an auditorium,
这就是我们国家的变革时刻，坐在大厅里很容易，
and it's easy for us to hear these different talks and to be inspired by them,
听见不同的说法、被这些说法所激励也很容易，
but the truth is, this kind of audacious shift in culture is going to demand that the warrior,
但实际上，这些文化上的转变需要你们中的斗士，
that the gladiator, that the protector in you and in me rises to the occasion to create a new definition of normal,
辩手，还有保护者站出来制定新的道德准则，
where girls, and women, and all people are treated with dignity and respect.
让女孩、妇女、所有人都能得到尊重。
Because the truth is that men are not simply the problem when it comes to violence against women,
因为在针对女性的暴力中，男性不仅仅是问题，
they're also the cure, and we have never needed them so much.
他们也是药方，我们从未像此刻这样迫切的需要他们。
So, for the real men out there, consider this your invitation. Thank you so much.
所以对于在座的各位男士，请把这当做我对你们的邀请。非常感谢大家。
