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Hey psycho family.
嘿，大家好。
Welcome back to another video.
欢迎收看这次的节目。
Thank you so much for all of the love and support that you've given us.
非常感谢你们给予我们的爱和支持。
Psycho 's mission is to make psychology and mental health more accessible to everyone.
我们的使命是让每个人都能更容易地了解心理学和心理健康。
And you help us do that now.
你现在就在帮我们这么做。
Let's begin.
我们开始吧。
An anxious avoidant relationship is one in which one person has an anxious attachment to another person who is avoidant.
焦虑回避性关系，是指一个人对另一个回避者具有焦虑性依恋。
Anxious attachment generally comes from a place of seeking out closeness and intimacy with others.
焦虑性依恋通常来自于寻求与他人亲近和亲密的地方。
This person tries very hard to avoid rejection and abandonment.
这个人努力避免被拒绝和抛弃。
On the other hand the avoidant person seeks a level of emotional distance that conflicts with their anxiously attached partner.
另一方面，回避型的人会寻求一种与焦虑依恋的伴侣产生冲突的情感距离。
Relationships like this are difficult to navigate when both partners have different and conflicting desires.
当双方都有不同且相互冲突的欲望时，这样的关系很难驾驭。
Before we begin, here is a quick reminder that this video is for informative purposes only
在我们开始之前，要提醒一下。本视频只是为了提供信息，
and should not be taken as relationship advice.
不应被视为处理这种关系的建议。
If you relate to this video, please reach out to a relationship counselor or other professional for help.
如果你存在这种关系，请联系一位关系顾问或其他专业人士寻求帮助。
With that said, let's go over five signs of an anxious avoidant relationship.
现在，让我们来看看焦虑回避关系的五个迹象。
One, feelings of suffocation.
一是窒息感。
When you are anxiously attached to someone, you may feel an intense need to be close to them.
当你焦虑地依恋着某人时，你可能会感到非常需要接近他们。
You seek out ways to get closer and feel elated when you do.
你会想方设法让彼此靠近，当你这样做时，你会感到高兴。
However, the avoidant partner may start to feel overwhelmed by the other person's intense desire to be near them.
然而，逃避型伴侣可能会开始被另一个人强烈的渴望弄得不知所措。
While the anxious partner wants closeness, the avoidant partner seeks distance.
焦虑型伴侣想要亲近，逃避型伴侣寻求距离。
Too much closeness can cause the avoidant partner to feel suffocated.
太亲密会让逃避的伴侣感到窒息。
Two, feelings of abandonment.
第二，被遗弃的感觉。
While feeling suffocated is associated with the avoidant partner, abandonment is more of an issue for the anxious partner.
虽然感到窒息与逃避型伴侣有关，但对于焦虑型伴侣来说，遗弃更是一个问题。
The avoidant partner requires a certain level of independence and emotional distance from the other.
逃避型伴侣需要一定程度的独立性和与对方的情感距离。
This can be problematic for the anxious partner, since it bars their desire to be close.
这对焦虑型伴侣来说可能是个问题，因为这会阻碍他们亲近的欲望。
They may feel that their efforts are no longer successful and that their partner is slowly drifting away from them.
他们可能会觉得自己的努力不再成功，他们的伴侣正在慢慢地远离他们。
Number three, concern over the relationship being one-sided.
第三，担心单相思。
The anxious partner may feel that the relationship is one-sided.
焦虑型伴侣可能会觉得这种关系是单向的。
They feel that the other person isn't putting in as much effort into the relationship as they are.
他们觉得对方在这段关系上投入的精力不如他们。
This issue can crop up especially during a conflict where one person wants to get closer and work through a problem,
这个问题可能会突然出现，尤其是在冲突中，一个人想要更接近并解决问题，
but the other person wants to keep their distance.
但另一个人却希望保持距离。
This may lead to an issue where one starts to antagonize the other.
这可能导致一个问题，即一方开始与另一方对抗。
Four, feelings of instability.
第四，不稳定的感觉。
The anxious avoidant relationship does lend itself to feelings of relationship instability.
焦虑回避型的关系确实会让人产生关系不稳定的感觉。
If you are the anxious one, you feel that your partner is becoming distant and uninterested.
如果你是那个焦虑的人，你会觉得伴侣变得疏远，对你不感兴趣。
If you are the avoidant person, you feel that your partner is too clingy and high maintenance.
如果你是那个回避的人，你会觉得伴侣太粘人，而且维护情感的成本太高。
Neither one can get what they want out of each other and this causes mutual feelings of dissatisfaction.
双方都不能从对方身上得到想要的东西，这就造成了双方的不满情绪。
This can become an increasingly toxic situation and cause you two to lash out at each other in misunderstanding.
这会使情况越来越糟糕，并导致你们两人在误解中互相攻击。
And number five emotional toxicity.
第五种情绪的毒性反应。
An anxious avoidant relationship is considered toxic.
焦虑性回避关系被认为是有害的。
You want different things out of each other and may find yourselves fighting about meaningless topics.
你们想从对方身上得到不同的东西，可能会发现自己在为毫无意义的话题争吵。
It can be antagonistic and you might place the problems of your relationship on one another.
这可能是敌对的，你可能会把关系中的问题推到对方身上。
You and your partner's needs are incompatible with one another.
你和你伴侣的需要无法相容。
This makes it extremely difficult to work through and resolve relationship complications.
这使得处理和解决这种复杂关系变得极其困难。
Did you find this video helpful?
你觉得这个视频有帮助吗？
Did it help you recognize any anxious avoidant personality traits in some of your present relationships?
它是否有助于你认识到，在你目前的一些关系中具有任何焦虑回避性性格特征？
Toxic relationships are difficult to navigate.
有毒害的关系很难驾驭。
So it's important to reach out to someone you trust if you think you need help.
所以，如果你认为需要帮助，联系你信任的人是很重要的。
If you found this video helpful please like it and share the video with others.
如果你觉得这个视频有帮助，请点赞并与其他人分享。
Don't forget to hit the subscribe button for more psycho content.
记得点击订阅按钮来获取更多的心理学视频。
The references and studies used are added in the description below.
参考文献和研究都列在了下面的描述中。
Thanks for watching and we'll see you in our next video.
感谢收看，我们在下一个视频中与您见面。
