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But how are universities to blame for all of this? I mean, they never explicitly asked students to trauma-dump in their essays, and many admissions experts have actually come out and discouraged discussing explicit trauma in essays.
大学应该为此负什么责任呢？它们从来没有明确要求学生在作文里大倒苦水，有很多招生专家其实站出来劝阻学生在作文里谈及明确的创伤。
However, I still don't think that universities are blameless.
但我不认为大学是无辜的。
The reason why the trauma essay is so ubiquitous is because it seems to be working.
创伤作文之所以大行其道是因为它似乎很有效。
Anne Trubek, who helped low-income high school students at Oberlin College write their essays, expresses the ethical dilemma that she faces.
安妮·特鲁贝克帮助欧柏林学院的低收入高中生撰写作文，她说出了她面临的道德困境。
"By pushing students to reveal their horror stories, I risk taking away their dignity, but by not pushing, I could be hindering their chances of getting into their dream school."
“要是我鼓励学生展示他们可怕的故事，我就冒着夺走他们尊严的风险，但如果我没有鼓励他们这么做，我就在阻碍他们被梦校录取的机会。”
Whether trauma essays and acceptance letters are actually causally correlated is impossible to tell from the outside.
创伤作文和录取信有没有严密的因果关系，从外部来看是无法断言的。
So this could all just be speculation and myth.
所以我们只能通过推断或者流言判断。
But in failing to resolutely clear up these speculations and myths about whether trauma essays are rewarded or discouraged, universities are indirectly enabling the rise of the trauma essay and all of its harmful implications.
但是，大学并没有坚决清除这些推测和流言，讨论它们到底鼓励还是不鼓励写创伤作文，所以它们间接导致了创伤作文和后续伤害的层出不穷。
So what are they to do about all of this? Well, first of all, I think that this is a problem that goes much deeper than individual universities, and even perhaps the institution of higher education itself.
那它们该做些什么呢？首先，我认为这不仅仅是某个大学的问题，甚至不是高等教育体系本身的问题。
It's rooted in the cultural obsession with appropriating trauma and making it consumable, as well as the systemic tendency to tokenize oppressed people and their experiences.
它归根结底来源于挪用创伤、让它为人津津乐道的文化执念，还有一个系统上的习惯，总是想标签化这些受压迫的人和他们的经历。
But there are still things that universities can do to make things better.
但为了改善这个局面，还是有大学能做的事的。
First, they can be more transparent about their admissions guidelines.
首先，它们可以让招生标准更加公开透明。
If it's really true that they don't want to reward trauma storytelling just for the sake of it, then they should be more forthcoming about this expectation.
如果它们确实不想奖励无谓的创伤故事，那就应该更直接地表明这个要求。
They could also restructure their prompts to avoid putting pressure on students to talk about past hardships and adversities and instead refocus prompts to ask students about their goals for the future and their academic interests.
它们也可以重新组织一下题目，避免给学生施加压力，谈论过往的艰难和困境，而是将题目聚焦在要求学生谈一谈对未来的目标和学术兴趣。
Secondly, admissions counselors should be trauma-informed and trained in working with BIPOC folk.
第二，招生顾问在与黑人、原住民和有色人种交流时，应更了解他们的创伤，更加训练有素。
As the unofficial gatekeepers to the secrets of getting into your dream college, they should wield their power responsibly and not pressure students to talk about traumatic experiences that they're not yet ready to talk about.
作为保守踏入梦校秘密的非官方守门人，他们应该负责任地发挥他们的力量，不要逼迫学生说出他们还没准备好谈论的创伤经历。
Lastly -- and this one's for anyone who's actually applying to a postsecondary institution sometime soon -- remember that you are more than the bad things that happened to you.
最后，也送给每一位在不久的将来要申请高中后教育机会的申请人，记住，你身上发生的坏事不是你的一切。
I know that when it seems like every other classmate of yours is writing an essay that could be adapted for an HBO original drama, that you may feel like your experiences are not worth talking about.
我知道，你的每个同学都在写那种可以改编成HBO 原创电视剧的作文，你可能会觉得你的经历根本不值一提。
But I promise that they are.
但我可以向你保证，它们值得一提。
You just have to find your voice and use it.
你只需要找到你的发言权，去使用它。
Now as much as I don't want to live that nail-bitingly stressful time of my life ever again, I can't help but wonder: what would I have written about if I got the chance to apply to UBC again? This time absent the pressure to strategically use my immigrant background to gain sympathy points.
虽然我不想再经历那段神经紧绷的时光，但我不禁想：如果我可以再申请一次 UBC （不列颠哥伦比亚大学），我会写些什么呢？这次，不再有巧妙利用我的移民背景博取同情分的压力。
Maybe I would have written about how I overcame my fear of public speaking and became comfortable with being the loudest voice in the room.
也许我可以写一写我如何克服公开发言的恐惧，适应成为在场最愿意发表意见的人。
Or I could have written about watching trashy reality television is what first sparked my interest in political science.
我也可以写一写看很烂的真人秀是激起我对政治学的兴趣的第一个火种。
Or maybe I still would have written about my immigrant story because that was a big part of my life journey and still impacts me to this day.
也许我还是可以写一写我的移民故事，但只是因为它是我人生旅途中的一大篇章，时至今日依然在影响着我。
But I would have done it on my own terms.
但我会用我自己的方式写下这个故事。
Instead of being written as a one-dimensional, trauma-turned-triumph trauma drama, I would have been able to tell a story that actually reflects who I am today and acknowledge the fact that my journey is ongoing and it doesn't begin or end with my racial identity.
我不会把它写成单一维度的、“克服创伤，取得胜利”的创伤大戏，而是让它讲述现在的我是谁，证明我的旅程还在进行中，它不会因我的种族身份开始或结束。
This is the kind of ownership that I wish for everyone to one day have over their story.
这就是我希望每个人都能拥有的对他们自己故事的主导权。
And now it's up for universities to decide whether they get to tell it.
现在就取决于大学给不给他们机会说出这个故事了。
Thank you.
谢谢。
