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1) What’s Said: “Maybe you’re not trying hard enough.”
What’s Heard: “This can come off sounding like you’re passing judgment on effort,” says Anderson. “It’s better to encourage a single person to explore new relationships to the extent they are comfortable and to extend themselves in ways that feel natural and not forced.”
说者：也许你没好好争取。
听者：你在贬低她的个人能力，你觉得她是个不上进的人。
