WHAT HE SAYS: “If you feel undervalued, ask for a raise。”
WHAT YOU HEAR: “Ugh, your problems are so simple – just fix it。”
WHAT HE MEANS: “Work’s bothering you? Let me help!” The truth is, men tend to see themselves as problem solvers in romantic relationships, and so what comes across as condescending1 can actually be your guy’s way of trying to help。
他说:“如果你觉得报酬低,可以要求加薪。”
你的理解:“哎,你的问题这么简单——只要解决就好了。”
他的意思是:“工作让你感到困扰吗?让我来帮助你!”事实上,在恋爱关系中,男人往往视他们自己为问题解决者,所以他看起来傲慢的表现实际上是你的男人在试图帮助你的方式。